Take Turns Writing: "The Perils of Ebo"

POSTED BY: Succatash
UPDATED: Wednesday, September 8, 2004 00:30
VIEWED: 15183
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SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 3:05 AM

THE PERILS of EBO

(Continued from: http://fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=17&t=4979)

As the group huddled around the card trying to read it and figure out who this Kat person (or thing) was, there was a sudden explosion.

Teela, Tash, and TJ were thrown off away from all of the people with bodies, who landed in a big pile.

The pile of people with bodies lay still for a while, collective tying to catch its breath when the Hippi said slowly, "You, know, while were down here, we might as well have an orgy."

The pile of bodies quicky sepperated.

"Ok," one of the heads in the jar of three said, "Roll call! Curly?"

"Here," answered the bald head.

"Larry?"

"Here," answered, the other head.

"Moe...here, obviosly. because I'm moe. Girl Hippi #1?"

"Here."

"Girl Hippi number 2?"

"Here."

"Bigger guy?"

"Present."

"Ok, good people," Moe said, "Any withstanding injuries?"

There were no takers.

Ebo cocked her head in wonder at the organization of the other gruop.

Girl Hippie #2 noticed Ebo's look and explained, "This sort of thing happens to us all the time. We've sort of formulated a routien for when ever stuff goes wrong."

Ebo raised an eyebrow, "This sort of thing happens to us a lot too."

"Whats your routine?"

"Speak up if your not here!" Ebo shouted then listened for a responce, she didn;t get one. Satisifed she said, "Good. You guys know the drill, If your bleeding, try not to move around too much. I'm not cleaning up the mess."

A voice spoke from the shadows. "Hello, I'm Kat the Destroyer."

SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 3:21 AM

The woman emerged from the shadows. She was dressed like a belly dancer, but she wore dozens of sharp knives up and down her arms and legs.

"Does anyone want to dance?" she asked sweetly.

LINDALE

Thursday, May 27, 2004 3:46 AM

"Sure." said the Hippie, and he and Kat burst into a complicated line dance.

"How are there shadows? I thought we were alone in the desert." said Ebo.

"Well, we are, except for the Holiday Inn across the road here. That casts a pretty big shadow. C'mon, let's talk to this Kat person. Think the Holiday Inn will have a stable for the mustangs?" Teela asked the Big Guy.

"Why not? It's convenient to the plot..."

Sure enough, the nice lady at the front desk found a place for the horses. After thanking her, everyone went over to Kat, who by this time was done dancing.

"So, who are you?" They asked.

"I'm the answer to your problems. Bigger Guy, you need to pop ahead 40 years, right? And Ebo, you're still looking for that pesky tablet, 'less I'm mistaken. Well, first thing's first. Bigger Guy, if you'll follow me-"

"Excuse me!" said 'Tash. "Your name is Kat the Destroyer. Emphasis on the Destroyer. Why are you helping us? and why should we trust you?"

"You guys are fellow evil-doers, at least according to this email I got about Cheney and some alien senators. I'm always willing to help out my collegues, assuming they'll return the favor." Kat replied.

"What-- What do you want?" said Ebo, a bit frightened.

"To be quite honest, the thing I want more than anything else, at this particular time, is some one on one time with the Hippie and his Golf Stick." Kat answered, with a coy smile.

The Hippie nodded, "I'll take this one for the team." and, arm in arm with Kat, he walked over to the inn.

-A while later-

Just as everyone was getting incredibly bored, the Hippie returned with Kat, whose knives were slightly askew.

Now all business, Kat instructed Bigger Guy to follow her. Once out of sight of everyone, she pushed him through a doorway that luckily doubled as a time machine as well as a portal. They stepped out into an airport much like the one Bigger Guy had fought Big Guy in, only more futuristic... and there, looking somewhat the same, somewhat older, was the group he'd left behind only moments ago. Kat gestured, "well, go ahead. You heard the mountain." At which time, Bigger Guy burst into song again.
Puzzled, FutureEbo, who looked exactly like RegularEbo, what with the being a robot, said, "wait a sec, didn't you do that the last time we were here? What's with you and singing?"

Bigger Guy shrugged, and was about to reply when he heard the mountain- "Very well, Your quest is complete."

Kat grabbed him, called to the others, "Nice to see y'all again, but we've gotta run", and walked back through the doorway/time machine/portal. Walking back to RegularEveryone, she said, "Now that that's taken care of, you're still looking for that tablet, right? Here it is, I found it last week while I was cleaning house. Have fun with that."

Excitedly, Ebo looked at the tablet. "So, this is supposed to have the definitive answer to the meaning of life, at least according to the Little People Things, right? hunh. That's interesting."

"What? What does it say?" cried Larry, Moe, and Curly.

SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 4:36 AM

"Does anyone have a bandaid?" asked the Hippie. He had cuts all over his arms and legs. "Never dance with a Destroyer," he muttered. He looked around, "Hey, where's the Bigger Guy? I was going to pull out my ukulele."

EBONEZER

Thursday, May 27, 2004 4:42 AM

Ebo looked at the tablet. In large, block letters it said:

42.

That couldn't be right. Ebo read it again:

42.

"Well son-of-a-bitch!" Ebo shouted, and smashed the tablet.

"What did it say?" Teela asked.

"It said crap. We need to make up a better one for the mountain people."

"But shouldn't we just tell them what it said? It could be important."

"But it had no cinematic meaning. It was borring. Were just going to jazz it up a bit."

Tash looked sideways at Ebo, "Is something wrong? You've been acting entirly to intelligent lately."

"Have I?," Ebo stated.

"Why?"

"Charchter development?"

"Thats not a logical reason. A persons IQ does not flucutate according to the will of the person. Or of the person writing the person. Or according to the will of the person telling the person who's writing the person what the person is supposed to do."

Ebo tillted her head, her eyes glazed over, and she said in a detatched tone, "A what now? I need that in Ebo dummy talk."

Tash bubbled happliy, "I fixed Ebo. She's back to her useless self again."

-----------------------------------

Four out of five dentists reccomend calling Ebo a girl.

SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 5:12 AM

Kat walked over to Ebo and patted her on the rump. "We're going to get along just fine," she said with a smile.

EBONEZER

Thursday, May 27, 2004 5:15 AM

"Ow!" Ebo shouted and hopped away from the knives stuck to Kat. She tripped over the pile of broken tablet pieces and fell sprawling to the ground.

"Ow!" She groaned and looked at the peiced of the tablet, "Who's the dumb loser who put those there?"

Teela sighed, "Yep, she's back to her old self again..."

-----------------------------------

Four out of five dentists reccomend calling Ebo a girl.

SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 5:33 AM

Kat the Destroyer looked flustered and she blushed. "Sorry... but where I come from, that's how we..."how you say... Give Five?"

She began to cry out of embarrassment. The Hippie put his arm around her to be nice.

"Hey!" cried Kat. "You just asked me to marry you, where I come from!"

EBONEZER

Thursday, May 27, 2004 5:36 AM

Ebo grinned, "Oh, its ok. Thats pretty common where i come from too. But those knives are sharp and pointy."

Kat grinned sheepishy and said, "I can be more careful."

"Hey!" Ebo said, "How do you offend someone where you come from? I like subtly offending people."

"Oh, well thats simple," Kat grabbed Ebo around the wrist, "there you have it. Thats very offensive where i come from."

"Hey!" Tash yelled from his jar, "Leggo my Ebo!"

-----------------------------------

Four out of five dentists reccomend calling Ebo a girl.

SUCCATASH

Thursday, May 27, 2004 5:42 AM

Tash turned back to his private meeting with Teela, Tash Jr. and the other Jar of 3 heads.

The Big Guy and the two Hippie Girls suddenly returned with their arms full of firewood.

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