Title: Unpredictable

Author: Ana Sedai

Rating: PG

Character(s): Mal, River, Simon, Kaylee

Prompt: 100 - Fire

Word Count: 1,000 (Whew! Just made it.)

A/N: 13/100 for Joss100. Feedback is God. I give burnt offerings to it on a daily basis.

Summary: Unpredictability may be the spice of life, but it tends to give Simon indigestion.

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“Captain, are you insane? Have you forgotten what happened the last time you took her out on a job?”

“Why, yes I do, Doctor. As I seem to recall, she saved our collective asses from Reavers. Am I missin’ something?”

“Just the part where she almost got killed!”

“Look, Doc, I appreciate your concern, but in case you’ve forgotten, River’s able to tell when we’re gettin’ cheated and the like, and Badger ain’t ever been what you’d call on the ‘up-and-up’ with us. Zoë and I’ll have four guns between us, and River’s more’n able to take care of her own self in a situation, should it come to that. Final word is that she’s ready, she’s comin’, and that’s that!”

By this time, Mal and Simon were toe-to-toe, glaring at each other, with their faces about two inches apart. Kaylee, attracted from the kitchen by the shouting, took one look at the testosterone tornado brewin’ in the cargo bay and decided to jump in before one (or both) of her two favorite men ended up with a bloody nose. Again.

She marched into the bay.

“Simon, Cap’n, shouldn’t River should make up her own mind about this? I mean, she is eighteen ‘n all. She’s not so crazy anymore. She’s grown up now.”

Both men’s heads swiveled towards her simultaneously. It was funny, actually. Simon looked annoyed that she wasn’t squarely on his side. Mal just looked annoyed that she’d interrupted him mid-rant.

He opened his mouth, then promptly shut it as he got a strange expression on his face, like he’d figured something out that he hadn’t considered before.

Kaylee wasn’t blind. River and the Capt