Mal sat on the edge of his bunk, mind churning. Zoe's visit had healed him in some indefinable way. Problem was, he'd given up for a reason. An hour ago, he'd been more miserable than he could measure; now, he was simply terrified.

Zoe was still following him, and he was in no shape to lead. He took a deep breath. "Well, son, you're just gonna have to change that," he told himself. "Buckle down and face it, 'cause there ain't no way around it."

Seeing her had brought to the fore something that worried him deeply. Zoe was here too. If she ever had to go through something like that, and worse, if it had anything to do with him.......

He'd figured out just one way to handle life in this place, and that was to shut down and give in. If they tied you down, you'd best get used to it. If they locked you up, you were gonna stay locked up until they decided otherwise, and if they felt like beating you 'til you were half dead, then you'd better get ready to endure it.

Mal looked down and saw his hands shaking. Planning a way out of this prison and into some sort of a life for him and Zoe meant thinking plainly, and that was the thing he most desperately longed to avoid. Hope meant another part of him that could be shattered, and when you cared about the future, it became something else that could be snatched away.

"- find what happiness you can. Just 'cause it may be snatched away the next minute doesn't mean you can't have it." Zoe's words echoed clear as day in his mind. He supposed she was right, as usual.

He flinched as a voice startled him out of his reverie. "Nice to see you showing some signs of life, sir." Mal looked out through the bars of his cell, forcing himself to meet the eyes of the young guard sitting in the hallway.

"And why exactly would that be?" Mal asked harshly.

The guard looked nonplussed. "Um.....I....uh....You been looking so miserable in there, I just kept hoping you'd maybe pick up a bit."

Mal studied hi