Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

The Treasure of Lei Fong Wu -- Chapter One

Friday, September 2, 2005

What's that attacking? Oh, no! Can it be? EXPOSITION! AAAAHHHRRRHH!

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 11005    RATING: 9.0 (PG)    SERIES: FIREFLY

Tweet

The Treasure of Lei Fong Wu

Chapter One

Lei Chin Yi watched with steady eyes through a crack in the door as the three big men came down the hall – and to the wrong apartment.

Not that this tentament was long on exact addresses – in fact, it was worse than the slave dorms on the other side of Meridian City. Crowded with “guest workers” and low-paid contract labor, the Company didn’t care too much if the mail got through to the right place. So there was little organization, standardization, or labeling. If you wanted directions to somewhere on the East Side, you got them by landmark.

But this, this was incompetence, and Chin Yi silently shook his head. Unprofessional. Disgraceful. A good hit-man knew the right place to hit, and a squad of three should have had enough brain cells between them to ask directions. Everyone in the neighborhood knew where Lei lived. To make that kind of mistake, to disturb an old lady like they were about to, that was almost unforgivable. His father would have had the men punished for such sloppy work.

But standards had slipped inside the Tong since his father’s day. With Tortoise in charge of the gang, muscle had been chosen for political reasons, not for competence. Lei knew all three of the thugs. Not one of them should have been given anything more complicated than bouncer detail at a brothel. But since Tortoise had come to power, standards had slipped. He rewarded personal loyalty over effectiveness, and these three cutthroats had been promoted to jobs only seasoned killers should have held.

Chin Yi eyed them again, preparing himself for the storm that was to come. He had been ready for this move for months. Ever since his father, Lei Peng Wu, had mysteriously died, leaving the leadership of the Yellow Ribbon Tong open to question. Chin Yi was a candidate, of course – he had been in the business since he was a child, and had studied the subtleties of effective criminal management since he was a thirteen at the knee of his venerable father. He had

Comments
Friday, 02 September 2005 00:35
OK, I came in a little early. Hope you don't mind. I probably won't post QUITE as often with this one, but it will still be pretty quick, all things considered.

Comments! Keep 'em comin'! My head's starting to deflate a little!

StA
Friday, 02 September 2005 00:40
You're starting the next one already?! You're really sucking around for a divorce. I'll comment tomorrow after I use your story as my sanity-preserving salvation at work.
ANONYMOUS
Friday, 02 September 2005 01:07
Fantastic! I'm eager to see where this leads.
Friday, 02 September 2005 02:23
GLEE!
I just emailed you telling you that I loved kaylee's lament and I come back and see you've started a new one already!

I got so excited that I'm commenting before reading, but I gave it a 10 anyway. I'm sure I'll love it.
ANONYMOUS
Friday, 02 September 2005 02:23
Ah, now I have a baseball bat named after me! How cool is that? I'm honored, StA! ...and more than a little surprised at you starting this one so soon after "Lament." I admire how quickly your creative mind works. Looking forward to the next one!

-- BlueBomber, who is out-of-town and too lazy to go back and sign in
Friday, 02 September 2005 02:29
You're certainly writing this for newcomers as well as diehards.

DARNGER: It's Kaywinnit Lee Frye, not Kaylee Winnit.
Friday, 02 September 2005 04:10
What could go wrong, indeed!

You are too good to us! I didn't expect to see chapter 1 so soon! Don't get in too much trouble with the missus, though ... I don't want you to have to stop writing altogether!
Friday, 02 September 2005 05:31
Us? Mind if you're early? Never !!!

Great beginning to what I'm sure will be another great piece. Looking forward to it!
Friday, 02 September 2005 10:33
Very cool loved your last story and was hoping your new one would start on their vaction.
Friday, 02 September 2005 13:11
This is already shaping up to be another gorram masterpiece! I loved Wash's dialogue with the Captain and sympathised with Kaylee not wanting to leave Serenity. I would have expected her to want to be watching over the shoulders of those bonded fellows as they rebuild Serenity's core. Can't wait to see what happens next! Hope that gorram legacy isn't going to be more trouble than it is worth. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Friday, 02 September 2005 19:46
damn you're good!
Saturday, 03 September 2005 01:28
Astutely shiny.
ANONYMOUS
Saturday, 03 September 2005 09:35
WOOT!

And I mean that!
KAYLEEROCKS
Saturday, 03 September 2005 23:57
Whee! I'm so glad you started a new story after Kaylee's Lament (i commented on almost every one--known as Anonymous then tho)! I love your writing it's absolutly FANTASTIC, but I'm better at explaining my critisicsms than what i like about stories. I only had one constructive critiscism for this:

Mal doesn't keep Simon and River around cause their 'useful.' Maybe he did in the beginning but not anymore. He now does it because he's a good man and does what's right. Not to mention he's keeping the Alliance from getting something they want :)

Shiny! Keep writing, keep flying
Sunday, 04 September 2005 06:54
I can't believe you're already starting another one of these. Your creative genius is singular. I just have one suggestion. When you finish a chapter, it would be really cool if you went back to the previous chapter and added an "on to chapter x" link. Gee, can you tell that I have had experience with usability testing? =)

Lookin' forward to reading the next chapter (which I see is already up...)
Sunday, 04 September 2005 13:20
Kayleerocks, I tend to agree. But is Mal ready to admit that to himself? To do so would be to acknowledge that his sentimentality has overridden his practical nature. This is an important question, especially in light of his questioning of his own identity. He has to justify it to himself somehow, because keeping that kind of heat around just because he likes them and he's a good man doesn't fit his interior map -- yet -- but keeping them around because they are useful to him and his crew does. And screwing the Alliance, while fun, is only as much fun if he can do it without being bound by law.

Just some ideas. Perspective is a tricky thing. Watch this space for future developments.

Thanks for reading,

StA
Monday, 05 September 2005 19:20
i stopped checking to see if you had writen anything for fear of finding nothing. boy, was i glad to be proven wrong. keep it up! thanks for taking your time to share this with us.
KAYLEEROCKS
Tuesday, 06 September 2005 01:49
Well when you put it THAT way... :d
Tuesday, 06 September 2005 15:20
Mmmmm, new story!!
Thursday, 08 September 2005 21:04
ye-AH! always a pleasure StA! off to read 2-4!
Friday, 16 September 2005 03:31
Glad your back, it took me a while to find out that it was you ScrewTheAlliance, but now that's over I'm gonna do some readin'.
Sunday, 06 November 2005 22:35
Yay! I just finished Kaylee's Lament and now we have a sequal! And since I am late in starting I have 32 chapters of goodness to catch up on!

Sunday, 06 November 2011 22:02
Ooo this is seriously SHINY!!! I loved Mal and Wash talking at the beginning, I couldn't stop laughing! And Little Kaylee not wanting to leave her girl! I really like your writing style, I read your fic 'Kaylees Lament' a while back, but I didn't have an account at the time so I couldn't comment, LOVED that one too btw. I might have to go back and reread it so I can comment. But first, I'm going to finish reading this one:D:D
LEARETH
Saturday, 20 July 2013 01:15
The new Blue Sun Room format, well newish for me since I hadn't visited in about 2 years, has removed all your paragraph breaks.
Sunday, 30 March 2014 08:50
Fantastic! I really enjoy your series, and just finished "Kaylee's Lament".
However, Leareth is correct. All the paragraph breaks are indeed gone. However, that isn't much of a deterrent c:
Sunday, 30 March 2014 08:51
Fantastic! I really enjoy your series, and just finished "Kaylee's Lament".
However, Leareth is correct. All the paragraph breaks are indeed gone. However, that isn't much of a deterrent c:

Post Your Comments

You must log in to post comments.