Repost.

Disclaimer: I don’t know whether the rumours are true (Yes, still. Or maybe I’d rather not believe), but they all belong to Joss regardless. GillianRose, Platonist, everyone this weekend I’ve bothered and brainstormed with: Thank You.

This is a follow-up to one of my other stories, February, which is much more hopeful. Heavy poetics and angst warning here. I really tried to make this a happy Valentine's Day fic; not to be. But, it's not as tragic as it COULD be, so that's saying something! Right?

Remember me when I am gone away, far away into the silent land, no more to hold me by the hand, nor I half turn to go yet turning stay. (Christina Rossetti)

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Diamond dust, fine and shimmering and cold, sifted through her numb fingers like sands in an hourglass. The Bodhi Tree carved beside her into the uppermost eave of the pagoda stretched out its branches to catch her as she leaned out over the ornate gilded railing, murmuring words of farewell. May the next life be a painless one, free of the suffering that you have endured.

With all her sisters around her, she never felt so alone, drowning in that ocean of light with no shore. She watched the trail scatter over the gardens, towards the city lights and stars that twinkled like fireflies ready to carry away her spirit.

When the ashes of her own life departed House Madrassa, there was nothing left for her there now, no position in the Guild that could tempt her to stay. Much as she loved Sihnon’s beauty, the rest of the ‘verse was waiting for her, and she had little time to see it all. So in sorrow she left, embarking upon a ship, her own Firefly, to answer that call from the stars. Two years later she was still alive. She could hardly believe it, at times. Especially not with the ever present peril the nán yĭ rěn shóu captain always courted; he seemed determined to die before she could.

Was it karma? What unspeakable crime had she committed in t