Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

Eidolon (Chapter 37)

Monday, October 1, 2012

A wind clear and sweet stirred the air, humming as a shimmering, ever-shifting blaze of color flashed from one horizon to another. The breeze carried with it a distant song, rising over the hills and through the vales like a soulful hymn from his childhood. (Flight)

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The two watchers waited for their backup, motionless, ready for her move - still smiling, always smiling, like carrion birds expecting the fear to drown her. A murder of toothsome crows, shrikes impaling her on long thorns. They surrounded her. She saw the others drifting like shadows, the seen and unseen, tangled up in wires sharp as knives, victims of a gallows whim. Ghosts of lives stolen, including her own, haunted her like a hall of reflections and infinite nested images.

Just one outcome in thousands. So many possibilities from one origin, and only one path ever chosen. Wavelengths painted in prism. A butterfly flapped its wings, and a veil dropped from clear skies. A field of chrysanthemum and peonies grew around her, golden and electric, filling the austerity with vivid hue. She could feel their confusion. Pale imitations. Their idea of deliverance was a steady aim.

She had walked willfully into this ambush. Visions of triumphs had been clearer than the tragedies, so much closer. She let her thoughts wander and the microcosm bled away to grey until she encountered herself, dancer lithe and poised to strike. Which was the reality? She seemed herself a raven, dark hair spun around her in the simile of wings and feathers, a grim psychopomp and harbinger of ill tidings. Wū ​yā​ zuǐ . Not her. Not the girl she had been, unrecognizable now, but the figment carved from herself, the cruel marionette.

Just a trick of the mind. Physics had no law here. River reached for the whirling tempest within her and struck first, releasing it onto the hapless landscape. The hurricane tore though the illusion, and a circle of judgment like those used by the patriotic tribunals was swept from amid the swirling fog. Three small children recoiled from where they stood around her, retreating from the exposure and onslaught. Startled. A brunette boy, all wild fringe and almond eyes; another ashen and empty; and a girl with hair like fire. All orphans wearing form-fitting Academy slate, no family to miss them. The but

Comments
BYTEMITE
Monday, 01 October 2012 23:45
Thanks to EB for help on this one. :)
Wednesday, 03 October 2012 06:09
The ending of this made me cry, you made me cry, Byte.

I'm going to go back and read again because I know I missed something.
BYTEMITE
Wednesday, 03 October 2012 15:49
I tried to hit some of the important issues that Mal's been carrying with him, and give him some closure here. He takes on so much blame, and assumes that the 'verse and everyone around him would be better off if he wasn't around. He dismisses the alternative, this more positive viewpoint for now because he can't really process it, but on some level he's heard.

I also gave River a little bit of closure, even though it's upset her. More on that coming up.

Anything I can help clarify?
Wednesday, 03 October 2012 23:53
I really like Mal's dream-like conversation with Wash and Book both admitting they missed each other. And it was good that River got a bit of closure. With so much going on in these last three chapters I was really worrying that those *tamade hundan* might catch them again. Great work, Ali D :~)
"You can't take the sky from me!"
BYTEMITE
Thursday, 04 October 2012 01:51
They just squeaked by. Told you it would turn out. :) Though I also wasn't particularly reassuring.

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