Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL
Back Stories I, Chapter 11/14
Monday, June 4, 2007
Ginger reflects on her time with the Alliance; Wash and Zoë deal with hot pursuit and a crazy captain.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 3844 RATING: 9.0 (PG13) SERIES: FIREFLY
Disclaimer: It belongs to Joss and all those business people. I’m just playing.
Rating: PG to NC17. I will not put warnings on each chapter, because I don’t want to give things away. In general, don’t be getting into any of this if you’re not prepared for adult storylines, violence, explicit sexual content, and - oh my - bad words.
Many thanks: to several fireflyfans.net members: and for hours of beta reading and entertaining discussions of many things. , , and provided additional beta time on the early chapters. The talented did the lovely artwork. (Ain’t it nice?) and http://www.chinesetools.com provided many colorful Chinese phrases. One of fine fics provided a useful plot bunny. (I won’t tell which yet!) Finally – kudos to for her inspirational fic . Links: Prequels: The Fish Job () () and Easy Tickets () (). Timing, pairings, and canon blurbs are in my .
Monday, 04 June 2007 20:24
OK, I swear I’m gonna give up on LJ soon. Well… no I won’t, I just need to whine. It seems every other day I can’t post or can’t comment. What the heck is going on over there?
Uh… regarding this chapter a little, and the few to follow a lot… I really do want to get onto Book 2, but I’m having a hard time getting the end of this one to behave. I am trying to push myself through it and keep up with the posting, but if I start running a day or two late, that’s why. And I have a feeling some of it is going to be a bit rough… oh well.
So, I don’t want to talk too much about the thickening plot, lest I spoil. Oh, but I got lots in store, if I can just motor through and get to it. The ball is just starting to roll…
BEB – I get what you meant now! Thanks for clarifying, and yes, you’re totally right about Inara. And I should see Eternal Sunshine, huh?
DesertGirl – I remember you mentioned something about Secret Agent Inara, (in an email? I don’t recall…) but I only grinned evilly.
Nosadseven – heyya! Good to see you back!
Uh… regarding this chapter a little, and the few to follow a lot… I really do want to get onto Book 2, but I’m having a hard time getting the end of this one to behave. I am trying to push myself through it and keep up with the posting, but if I start running a day or two late, that’s why. And I have a feeling some of it is going to be a bit rough… oh well.
So, I don’t want to talk too much about the thickening plot, lest I spoil. Oh, but I got lots in store, if I can just motor through and get to it. The ball is just starting to roll…
BEB – I get what you meant now! Thanks for clarifying, and yes, you’re totally right about Inara. And I should see Eternal Sunshine, huh?
DesertGirl – I remember you mentioned something about Secret Agent Inara, (in an email? I don’t recall…) but I only grinned evilly.
Nosadseven – heyya! Good to see you back!
Monday, 04 June 2007 21:57
I really dislike Will. Someone needs to kill him dead - the long and painful way.
And I was starting to feel pity for Ginger too. . .
Really wanted Zoe to hit Mal for his attitude. He's angry yes, but he should be more trusting of her. If Simon, River and Book are on his ship, and Zoe's ok with it, he needs to calm down. But, he did at the end - mostly.
And River - Simon needs to take a firmer hand with her. Because peeking into another's thoughts is whats making her freak out. What she learns from their thoughts are making her jump to those conclusions. She may KNOW peeking is wrong, but she needs to not do it. And someone needs to tell her that.
Still loveeee your Wash though. You write him so well!
And I was starting to feel pity for Ginger too. . .
Really wanted Zoe to hit Mal for his attitude. He's angry yes, but he should be more trusting of her. If Simon, River and Book are on his ship, and Zoe's ok with it, he needs to calm down. But, he did at the end - mostly.
And River - Simon needs to take a firmer hand with her. Because peeking into another's thoughts is whats making her freak out. What she learns from their thoughts are making her jump to those conclusions. She may KNOW peeking is wrong, but she needs to not do it. And someone needs to tell her that.
Still loveeee your Wash though. You write him so well!
Monday, 04 June 2007 22:35
LJ and FFF.net now! Apparently I can't comment here either, since it just ate my big, long comment *sighs*
Anyway, I said something along the lines of Great part! Poor Zoe, I think this is even harder on her in someways than it is on Mal - at least he forgets! Loved Jayne and Wash, very interested to see what's going to happen with Will and Ginger!! I even went back through The Fish Job to refresh my memory about a certain character, and was totally sucked in again, and ended up reading most of it over *G* Evil Mal4Prez, making your stories that good!! ;o)
As for LJ, the lj_maintenance comm reports that they have been 'attacked' by a high level of 'distributed denial of service' (or DDOS) traffic since last thursday or so, and it is impacting LJ's performance so that 'some' users are having difficulty posting, or posting anything longer than a few lines, or even accessing LJ at all. Apparently they are working on the problem, and those of us who can't post *waves* just have to wait it out and be annoyed and frustrated... :o/
Anyway, I said something along the lines of Great part! Poor Zoe, I think this is even harder on her in someways than it is on Mal - at least he forgets! Loved Jayne and Wash, very interested to see what's going to happen with Will and Ginger!! I even went back through The Fish Job to refresh my memory about a certain character, and was totally sucked in again, and ended up reading most of it over *G* Evil Mal4Prez, making your stories that good!! ;o)
As for LJ, the lj_maintenance comm reports that they have been 'attacked' by a high level of 'distributed denial of service' (or DDOS) traffic since last thursday or so, and it is impacting LJ's performance so that 'some' users are having difficulty posting, or posting anything longer than a few lines, or even accessing LJ at all. Apparently they are working on the problem, and those of us who can't post *waves* just have to wait it out and be annoyed and frustrated... :o/
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 04:27
“Zoë,” he said softly. “What if there’s nothing he can do?”
That line is a heartbreaker for sure. Excellent fic - and really wondering when Will gets his just rewards. You've got plenty of loose ends to tie up, each one deliciously evil. That's ok, though, it'll be worth the wait.
That line is a heartbreaker for sure. Excellent fic - and really wondering when Will gets his just rewards. You've got plenty of loose ends to tie up, each one deliciously evil. That's ok, though, it'll be worth the wait.
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 05:25
So I am thinking that this Utex thing would be the greatest item to have in my bag. Imagine a satellite phone, radio transmitter, cortex terminal, video projector, camera, and blackberry all rolled into one, how terrific. I wonder if it would work up a narrow sandstone canyon. Wait a minute I bet it would have a gps too. Do you think it would make my kids stop asking for ice cream every time we leave the house?? Maybe wash the dishes? I think I’ll go scan the cortex and see if such a thing exists, perhaps the Sharper Image? Although knowing me I would need River to explain how the thing works in “Captain Dummy Talk.” Or maybe purchase “Utex for dummies” from Amazon.
It’s late I think I am getting a bit punchy. All jesting aside, another great chapter. Looking forward to reading more. - Heidi
It’s late I think I am getting a bit punchy. All jesting aside, another great chapter. Looking forward to reading more. - Heidi
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 07:55
This is excellent. I feel such sympathy for Mal and the loss of his memories. Yet it's much harder for the rest of the crew as they have to live through it every day.
Keep going - it's fabulous!
Keep going - it's fabulous!
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 08:22
Brilliant with moments of downright creepifying. I don't agree with Leiasky about wanting to hit Mal for his attitude, with the mental grinder he has been going through it is not as if he is lashing out because it so much fun for him. Zoe understands though it is breaking her to keep going because there are such firm and fast friends and to have him not remember so much is wearing in the extreme. I think River understands most because she knows what it is to be broken, to have others not understand the tortured landscape of her mind. I don't think Simon needs to take a firmer hand with River, the way he spoke to her in this part was perfect and both calmed and informed her which is what she both wants and needs. I loved Wash in this and did smile at Jayne even if I didnt' completely agree with him.
I am all kinds of anxious about that odious creep Will pursuing Serenity and also feel some sympathy for Ginger. Not sure if that will last if she does as Will wants, and I just know Will is not going to be content to have a 'watching brief'. I would so love Zoe to get hold of Will and rip him to tiny little shreds or maybe Mal coming face to face with that *tamade hundan* will shock his brainbox back into place in a way medicine never can.
You really know how to pile on the angst, and then we have poor Kaylee worrying that she will be one of the next people the Captain forgets. Ow! Please let there be a light at the end of the tunnel because I just know you are taking us somewhere even darker. Fabulous writing, Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
I am all kinds of anxious about that odious creep Will pursuing Serenity and also feel some sympathy for Ginger. Not sure if that will last if she does as Will wants, and I just know Will is not going to be content to have a 'watching brief'. I would so love Zoe to get hold of Will and rip him to tiny little shreds or maybe Mal coming face to face with that *tamade hundan* will shock his brainbox back into place in a way medicine never can.
You really know how to pile on the angst, and then we have poor Kaylee worrying that she will be one of the next people the Captain forgets. Ow! Please let there be a light at the end of the tunnel because I just know you are taking us somewhere even darker. Fabulous writing, Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 11:59
Phew, what a chapter. Poor Mal. I can't say that enough. You really like to torture him, don'tcha? But this was an excellent chapter.
Loved Ginger at the begining. Nice insight into her, she really feels like she fits into the 'verse. And I HATE Will. But I think Ginger is redeemable.
As for the rest of it, loved it. Really loved Jayne's atitude and Wash's voice - you got those down pat. Only problem - Kaylee was hardly in this chapter. Lol. But that's just me being a whinge.
TEN
xxxx
Loved Ginger at the begining. Nice insight into her, she really feels like she fits into the 'verse. And I HATE Will. But I think Ginger is redeemable.
As for the rest of it, loved it. Really loved Jayne's atitude and Wash's voice - you got those down pat. Only problem - Kaylee was hardly in this chapter. Lol. But that's just me being a whinge.
TEN
xxxx
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 14:31
Thanks for the LJ info 2x2! It's like you say - I can post little short bits, depending on what's in them. I know there's been issues with some communities getting axed because they allow porn, and it's making me wonder if some evil bot is rejecting my stuff based on content. Which is ridiculous - there's not anything like smut in this! *grrrrr*
Chazzer - no worries! We'll catch up with Kaylee in the next chapter! :)
Chazzer - no worries! We'll catch up with Kaylee in the next chapter! :)
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 16:19
Mal4prez,
I probably should watch “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” as well if I am going to recommend it. And I am glad I managed to clarify my point…one critique that’s been levelled me by numerous university TAs is that I write stuff under the assumption the idea is clear (in essays and papers) when it really isn’t;)
Now…to the chapter at hand: first off, I have to say that for all the brilliant dialogue and descriptions you have crafted here, the one that truly hit me the hardest for emotional impact is the last line where Mal asking “Zoë? What if there’s nothing he can do?” and Zoë can’t give him an answer. I was immediately struck with a picture of Nathan/Mal partially in shadow and partially illuminated with starlight, his back to Zoë, as he asks that heart-wrenching question as I read that line. The scene in itself is an Emmy-winning kind of thing, to be honest about my opinion :D
Secondly…I like what you’re doing with Ginger. She’s the kind of ambiguous character Joss and his merry band of scribes loved to use to discuss Very Big Ideas. We want to like her because she’s not too far removed background-wise from Jayne or Kaylee – in that she’s from a Rim planet or moon where her natural skills would go to waste once she got married (Kaylee), so she decided to seek her fortunes elsewhere (Jayne) – but her inability to risk her life and her future to actually embody the kinds of behaviour the Alliance wants its citizens and its official representatives to have by dealing with Will weakens the love we want to feel, IMO. I too seriously hope she can get back into our good graces by helping the BDHs out when Will wants to smite them for making him look bad.
Thirdly, the Simon-River scene in the infirmary (and its immediate predecessor, with Simon in the infirmary and River hiding nearby outside) was definitely a well-played moment. We get to see just how Mal’s condition and Jayne’s comments are affecting her, in how she dives into Simon’s mind to find what she’s glanced at before…and we see how the consequences of that action pan out in her manic plea to Simon about not leaving “Serenity.” Simon’s handling of the situation can be seen as a little too soft-handed, but I really think that how you had him talk River down and explain things to her does the double duty of educating and chastising her in a manner where she doesn’t feel persecuted or like she’s being lectured at. That and Simon’s witty retort about Zoë not letting him leave until Mal’s been healed ;D
Finally, much as Jayne was in all kinds of fine form here, I really have to hand it to you about how you handled Wash in the scenes where he was featured! Especially during the escape from the Southbourne Docks, when he uses Alliance technology to trick the patrol ships into busting the Stingers without reeling “Serenity” in with them, we get to see Wash craft and execute a plan all in the span of minutes that actually beats out anything tactically-minded Mal or Zoë could come up with. I really like to think that, given enough time, Joss & Co. would have shown just how dangerous Wash can be when he puts his mind to it. Zoë wouldn’t marry no fool ;D
BEB
I probably should watch “Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind” as well if I am going to recommend it. And I am glad I managed to clarify my point…one critique that’s been levelled me by numerous university TAs is that I write stuff under the assumption the idea is clear (in essays and papers) when it really isn’t;)
Now…to the chapter at hand: first off, I have to say that for all the brilliant dialogue and descriptions you have crafted here, the one that truly hit me the hardest for emotional impact is the last line where Mal asking “Zoë? What if there’s nothing he can do?” and Zoë can’t give him an answer. I was immediately struck with a picture of Nathan/Mal partially in shadow and partially illuminated with starlight, his back to Zoë, as he asks that heart-wrenching question as I read that line. The scene in itself is an Emmy-winning kind of thing, to be honest about my opinion :D
Secondly…I like what you’re doing with Ginger. She’s the kind of ambiguous character Joss and his merry band of scribes loved to use to discuss Very Big Ideas. We want to like her because she’s not too far removed background-wise from Jayne or Kaylee – in that she’s from a Rim planet or moon where her natural skills would go to waste once she got married (Kaylee), so she decided to seek her fortunes elsewhere (Jayne) – but her inability to risk her life and her future to actually embody the kinds of behaviour the Alliance wants its citizens and its official representatives to have by dealing with Will weakens the love we want to feel, IMO. I too seriously hope she can get back into our good graces by helping the BDHs out when Will wants to smite them for making him look bad.
Thirdly, the Simon-River scene in the infirmary (and its immediate predecessor, with Simon in the infirmary and River hiding nearby outside) was definitely a well-played moment. We get to see just how Mal’s condition and Jayne’s comments are affecting her, in how she dives into Simon’s mind to find what she’s glanced at before…and we see how the consequences of that action pan out in her manic plea to Simon about not leaving “Serenity.” Simon’s handling of the situation can be seen as a little too soft-handed, but I really think that how you had him talk River down and explain things to her does the double duty of educating and chastising her in a manner where she doesn’t feel persecuted or like she’s being lectured at. That and Simon’s witty retort about Zoë not letting him leave until Mal’s been healed ;D
Finally, much as Jayne was in all kinds of fine form here, I really have to hand it to you about how you handled Wash in the scenes where he was featured! Especially during the escape from the Southbourne Docks, when he uses Alliance technology to trick the patrol ships into busting the Stingers without reeling “Serenity” in with them, we get to see Wash craft and execute a plan all in the span of minutes that actually beats out anything tactically-minded Mal or Zoë could come up with. I really like to think that, given enough time, Joss & Co. would have shown just how dangerous Wash can be when he puts his mind to it. Zoë wouldn’t marry no fool ;D
BEB
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 18:23
BEB - I love you LOL! The last line was something completely different until the day I posted, which was odd because the rest of this final Zoe/Mal scene has been written, pretty much as is, since like February. The Simon/River scene was the latest added, just over the weekend... Anyway, I'm so glad the recent changes worked for you! I worry when I don't have time to go over and over things.
Your description of Nathan/Mal at the end is really perfect. Oh, if only we could see our captain on screen again! :(
Your description of Nathan/Mal at the end is really perfect. Oh, if only we could see our captain on screen again! :(
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 18:29
I love this story -- the voices are so good. And I am very impressed with how you are managing the pov problem -- good on ya.
You know what this reminds me of, a little, is watching Ilian disintegrate in Lois McMasters Bujold's "Memory." (If you don't already know and adore Miles Vorkosigan you need to make his acquaintance ASAP. He's not as pretty as Miles but oh, my, what a mind. And there're a bunch of books -- enough for a couple of weeks anyway.)
You know what this reminds me of, a little, is watching Ilian disintegrate in Lois McMasters Bujold's "Memory." (If you don't already know and adore Miles Vorkosigan you need to make his acquaintance ASAP. He's not as pretty as Miles but oh, my, what a mind. And there're a bunch of books -- enough for a couple of weeks anyway.)
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 18:29
That should have been "as pretty as Mal" in the last comment. Sorry.
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 18:43
Vorkosigan... that's a good sci-fi name. Or a good sci-fi creature name LOL! So, is this a movie? Or a book? I've never heard of it!
There are a few stories I've drawn from for this, but I'm not going to own up to them till I'm done posting. That spoiling problem...
Oh - and welcome Miss! (I saw that you just signed up.)
There are a few stories I've drawn from for this, but I'm not going to own up to them till I'm done posting. That spoiling problem...
Oh - and welcome Miss! (I saw that you just signed up.)
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 21:35
Oh damn. Sorry I didn't comment on the last chapter, I had to do stuff and I was also being lazy.
I love the begining in Ginger's POV. I like her, despite the fact that she hijacked Serenity. She seems to know right from wrong. Kinda like our BDH's.
Mal is gonna get all kinds of confused everytime he happens to get a glimps of Simon, River or Book. I assume they'll try to keep hidden most of the time, but the ships not that big. And Mal's bound to happen across one of 'em.
If Mal forgot Kaylee, it would break my heart. I hope his memory loss doesn't go that far.
How far could his memory loss go? Could he, at one point, think that he is, like, 5, or even never born!? That would be gnha! There are no words to describe that feeling. But I need to stop fretting, I'm trusting that it will never get that far.
I love the begining in Ginger's POV. I like her, despite the fact that she hijacked Serenity. She seems to know right from wrong. Kinda like our BDH's.
Mal is gonna get all kinds of confused everytime he happens to get a glimps of Simon, River or Book. I assume they'll try to keep hidden most of the time, but the ships not that big. And Mal's bound to happen across one of 'em.
If Mal forgot Kaylee, it would break my heart. I hope his memory loss doesn't go that far.
How far could his memory loss go? Could he, at one point, think that he is, like, 5, or even never born!? That would be gnha! There are no words to describe that feeling. But I need to stop fretting, I'm trusting that it will never get that far.
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 21:56
About Vorkosigan: There is a series of novels by Lois McMasters Bujold which are known collectively as the Vorkosigan Chronicles. They posit a 'verse much like that of our BDHs -- no aliens, etc -- and they are wonderful.
They are girl books in guy drag,i.e. there is lots of tech and blood and guts but lots of relationships and psychology, also. Miles, like Mal, is haunted.
Miles Vorkosigan is the hero, and the son of the heroes whom we meet in the first book, Shards of Honor. We meet him as a miserable adolescent in the Warrior's Apprentice, where he single-handedly invents an entire mercenary force and an alternative identity. They are thought-provoking, hilarious and heartbreaking. It was missing Miles that brought me to Firefly -- through my own adolescent daughter.
She said, come on Mom, it's almost as good as Miles and it is.
Thanks for the welcome.
They are girl books in guy drag,i.e. there is lots of tech and blood and guts but lots of relationships and psychology, also. Miles, like Mal, is haunted.
Miles Vorkosigan is the hero, and the son of the heroes whom we meet in the first book, Shards of Honor. We meet him as a miserable adolescent in the Warrior's Apprentice, where he single-handedly invents an entire mercenary force and an alternative identity. They are thought-provoking, hilarious and heartbreaking. It was missing Miles that brought me to Firefly -- through my own adolescent daughter.
She said, come on Mom, it's almost as good as Miles and it is.
Thanks for the welcome.
Tuesday, 05 June 2007 22:09
Well, what can I say that hasn't already been? Unfortunately, my reading time is limited, so I can't always comment. Rest assured, I've not yet missed a chapter. Your work is fantastic. I've also learned a couple of formatting tricks by reading your work.
I love reading the recaps Zoe lays down for Mal, sometimes adding little tidbits as they come to her. The part about the ear, adding it on as if it were an inconsequential. That made me laugh. And I enjoy Ginger's history. She reminds me of Zoe in her strength, talents, and independence.
Please keep up the excellent work.
Rob O.
I love reading the recaps Zoe lays down for Mal, sometimes adding little tidbits as they come to her. The part about the ear, adding it on as if it were an inconsequential. That made me laugh. And I enjoy Ginger's history. She reminds me of Zoe in her strength, talents, and independence.
Please keep up the excellent work.
Rob O.
Wednesday, 06 June 2007 06:19
Hank's gun! I feel so fulfilled.
I really enjoyed this chapter - so much going on! While I appreciate the structure of the single POV chapters, the shifting POVs really keep things moving.
Your Jayne always cracks me up (just as he does in the show), and his amusement at the thought of Mal and Simon's new 'first' encounter rings hilariously true. And his reluctant semi-acknowldgement that the crew may well be next on the list of the forgotten was perfect.
As I've mentioned in previous comments, I can't get enough Mal and Zoe interaction, and I love seeing her upfront with him, as wearying and pointless as that may be. Their conversation in the shuttle was aching and dramatic, but also funny at times (e.g., "Niska really don't like you, sir."). I really enjoyed it!
I love thinking of all the directions this story can go - and of course, seeing where you actually take it.
I also appreciate the time and work you're putting into this. I know how things done for enjoyment can take on a whole different feel come crunch-time. Thanks for keeping us entertained!
I really enjoyed this chapter - so much going on! While I appreciate the structure of the single POV chapters, the shifting POVs really keep things moving.
Your Jayne always cracks me up (just as he does in the show), and his amusement at the thought of Mal and Simon's new 'first' encounter rings hilariously true. And his reluctant semi-acknowldgement that the crew may well be next on the list of the forgotten was perfect.
As I've mentioned in previous comments, I can't get enough Mal and Zoe interaction, and I love seeing her upfront with him, as wearying and pointless as that may be. Their conversation in the shuttle was aching and dramatic, but also funny at times (e.g., "Niska really don't like you, sir."). I really enjoyed it!
I love thinking of all the directions this story can go - and of course, seeing where you actually take it.
I also appreciate the time and work you're putting into this. I know how things done for enjoyment can take on a whole different feel come crunch-time. Thanks for keeping us entertained!
Monday, 11 June 2007 14:06
Hey! Way behind, haven't been online in forever, and trying to catch up. Brilliant as always. Nice job with Ginger; again you really make us care about her and understand her well.
Mal & Zoe kill me as always, as do the crew wondering who the captain will forget next, but I have to say what I love about this chapter is the Wash/Zoe inversion. I have a sneaking suspicion you had too much fun writing <i>“Can’t talk!” Wash told Zoë. “Running now!” </i> ("Not now, dear.") and <i>“Zoë – we’re on!” Wash yelled as he punched the controls to close the hatch</i> plus the ensuing Wash-takes-controlness. Hee, go Wash! (Notice homespun is blocking out the bad things, too. Also blocking out whether or not italic formatting works. Hope so.) On to read the next...
Mal & Zoe kill me as always, as do the crew wondering who the captain will forget next, but I have to say what I love about this chapter is the Wash/Zoe inversion. I have a sneaking suspicion you had too much fun writing <i>“Can’t talk!” Wash told Zoë. “Running now!” </i> ("Not now, dear.") and <i>“Zoë – we’re on!” Wash yelled as he punched the controls to close the hatch</i> plus the ensuing Wash-takes-controlness. Hee, go Wash! (Notice homespun is blocking out the bad things, too. Also blocking out whether or not italic formatting works. Hope so.) On to read the next...
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