Blue Sun Room FICTION - ADVENTURE
Comments
Thursday, 18 January 2007 10:53
Remember to let me know about any errors and ill get right on it
Part 3 should be ready in a week
Part 3 should be ready in a week
HORATIOFROG
Thursday, 18 January 2007 13:17
I for one am really liking this tale. It's keeping me on my toes, and your characterizations are quite good.
If I may, though...you might want to use some sort of system to differentiate which character you have speaking. I can follow along okay, but there's times I get confused as to who's talking.
Looking forward to the next part...:)
If I may, though...you might want to use some sort of system to differentiate which character you have speaking. I can follow along okay, but there's times I get confused as to who's talking.
Looking forward to the next part...:)
Thursday, 18 January 2007 21:16
There's some mighty good stuff here, jeraxus...but you really need to have someone look over your chapters before hand that could help iron out the rough formatting and lack of clear indication about who's speaking and when. You have some really great ideas down here...but they're getting lost in the jumble.
BEB
BEB
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