Sequel to The Way

Disclaimer: all things Firefly/Serenity are the property of Whedon et al. I’m just playing with his toys.

Rating: NC-17 for some parts. My first time writing NC-17 so bare with me. You’ve been warned.

Note: the title is from Jeffrey Foucault’s “Thistledown Tears”. Great tune and the vid by Here’s Luck does it complete justice.

Chapter one

“Jayne. Jayne? Can ya hear me?”

There was a silence on the ship that was disconcerting. River could feel it. She had walked the halls, stood in the hold and had asked it out loud, but could not understand why. Even suited in the vacuum of the black, she still could not discover the reason for the silence.

Until she stood on the catwalk railings with her ear to the ceiling, like she had that time before, did she realise. It wasn’t that the people were quiet, tip-toe like, but Serenity was, too. The hum of comfort was gone.

Serenity was sad and River didn’t know how to fix her.

She went to Kaylee to see what the ship was telling her, but the mechanic couldn’t hear. Her own thoughts were filled with anguish and sorrow. Zoe had shut down her emotions, what little she allowed, to keep herself from breaking. River respected that barrier and sometimes wished she could do the same; maybe then she wouldn’t be crazy.

Mal was locked, too. Hidden the key to where only Inara could find it.

Maybe, just maybe, Simon could help her this time.

She watched as he administered more sedatives to Jayne to keep him from feeling. Simon had tried the same with her, and it worked for a little while, but then the voices would return and she would get lost in the shuffle. Felt like the only time she was found was when she was causing pain.

Standing with her hand moving up the door, she continued her observation of her brother until he noticed her. “River. Is everything all right?”

She waited a moment before answering, letting her feet glide over the threshold into the lab that she