Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

Cold

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

A short musing on Mal's thoughts when he brings Tracey home, via a prompt and a word limit, which I broke. 200+

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2798    RATING: 9.0 (PG)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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My pal Hez prompted me to write this, which is good to shake the brain loose and get me to think about finishing DTRH. Meanwhile, Mal's standing in front of Tracy's parents after bringing their son home. We see the snow falling down. What's he thinking? It was supposed to be 100 words, but, yeah, right.

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Damn but he was cold. Yi qui iceball they stuck people on, expected 'em to make do. If he had folk livin' here, he'd do his damndest to get 'em off, too. But with a plan that had a chance in di yu of workin'. Gorram Tracey'd never had a lick of sense, never.

That'd be his ma, leanin' over him. Use to send him letters sayin' to mind his superiors 'n come home safe. Son of a bitch never much minded anyone less he was gettin' his ass shot off and was callin' for help, the wang be dan. Was always tellin' him to look out. Never mattered. Boy carried trouble like he had a magnet for it. Turns out was only a magnet for Mal's bullet 'n threats aside, that was wrong. That was twenty kinds of wrong. This was Tracey, no more sense 'n a Fed's rear end. Made you want to dust him yourself with the stuff he'd pull, but then he'd show with lifted hooch 'n everyone would have a laugh.

Sure as hell wasn't Mal was supposed to end him. Verse knows he'd seen every sad-ass sadistic twist on wrong in the past ten years but none of it... Hell.

Was glad Kaylee gave Tracey's daddy the recording. Said more'n he could, 'n he didn't much feel like talking.

Wasn't Mal was supposed to end him.

He looked to Zoe. It shouldn'a been us.

Shouldn'a been us.

But maybe best it was.

Damn, but he was cold.

Comments
Tuesday, 10 June 2008 21:54
Wonderful!
Tuesday, 10 June 2008 23:05
Truly lovely! The last line was perfect. It's Mal on so many levels.
Tuesday, 10 June 2008 23:19
So sad but then Tracy never did have a lick of sense. Ali D
You can't take the sky from me
Tuesday, 10 June 2008 23:27
Beautifully done! Wonderful things come in small packages!
Wednesday, 11 June 2008 00:37
Love your writing as always!
Wednesday, 11 June 2008 15:53
Love your writing as always. This was simple and poetical and said so much through the imagery instead of words. Sigh. Now how is Simon doing on his hijacking?



Wednesday, 11 June 2008 19:54
Way to get in the nudge, Katesfriend! LOL!

Interesting snapshot into Mal's mind. I like the depth of feeling, and the kind of distraction too. With the cold. They play together well. I have some criticism, not sure if it's just my brain being slow today so maybe I'll PM it to you.

Oh, and...

*nudge*

*nudge* *nudge*

:)

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