Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

Stumbling Along

Saturday, March 24, 2007

Post-BDM. Mal makes a delivery on a familiar moon. Inara reflects. M/I. PG-13

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3470    RATING: 9.0 (PG13)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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Dedicated to AWindsor. Hope this makes you feel better, dear!

Thanks to TamSibling for taking a look.

***

Stumbling Along

She dreamed about Nandi again last night. It's being back here on this desolate moon that does it. She woke up with her heart pounding even though it was a peaceful little dream: a sweet memory from seven years back, or was it eight? Mal sleeps next to her, snoring softly with his mouth open. She lifts his arm, trying to burrow into the warmth of his bare chest. He turns away from her in his sleep.

When she wakes up again, the far side of the bed is cold. She wants to sleep longer but she promised Simon she would go to the market with him, and it's already half past nine.

Simon orders flowers like he does supplies for the infirmary-with authority and precision.

"You didn't really need me," Inara insists as the vendor wraps up the stems. "You were fine on your own."

Simon smiles and plucks two hibiscus flowers from the laden cart.

"These too, please," he says. He nudges the red bloom behind Inara's ear and drops the white in her shopping bag. "Will you give that to River? She's too old to want a flower from her big brother. I think she'd prefer it from her friend."

"Of course," Inara says, touched. "And thank you."

"Zoe. Do you think . . .?"

"No," she says, shaking her head a little, and after a moment he nods.

"No, you're right. That would be . . . "

He offers a half smile and a crooked arm, and Inara tucks her hand inside, allowing him to lead her. Simon negotiates the crowd with a straight back and sure feet. He seems stronger, less twitchy, as Mal would say. As though he can lose himself in this noisy, sweating market that is ripe with the scents of fish and vegetables and humanity.

Maybe the market has a cloistering effect on Simon, but Inara feels trapped. Once upon a time, five years ago, or two or ten or a hundred for all it matters, Ina

Comments
Saturday, 24 March 2007 01:33
Absolutely beautiful! I loved it. The whole thing is just great.

I think you've touched on some really great moments that Post-Miranda would be plaguing Mal and Inara. And Nandi's death was never really dealt with - at least not from Inara's point of view.

This is just so beautiful and full of Joss' voice - kudos my dear!

Oh, and the swimming for an hour thing - priceless Mal!
Saturday, 24 March 2007 01:44
Loved this fic as I've loved all your work. Fabulous Mal voice and River was just perfect. You write the kind of fic that is so true to form I can see it playing out scene by scene.

I always thought that when Inara cries in Heart of Gold, she is really crying for herself, because she knows she is no longer a real companion. If she were, it wouldn't have made any difference that Mal slept with Nandi.
AWINDSOR
Saturday, 24 March 2007 02:01
*happy dancing, probably with some singing involved*

*claps like a four year old*

My fic! Okay, okay, if we're gonna get all technical like, YOUR fic.

And what a lovely fic it is.
Beautiful imagery and dissonance(?) if that makes any sense. Like I was confused at parts but in the good way, like we're not in just one linear time here, we're ghosting back and forth. :) Me gusta mucho.

I would love to see more of your Inara/Nandi back story.
So absolutely lovely.

Saturday, 24 March 2007 02:51
This was so good and it was really nice to have them return to the Heart of Gold and see how things were going along. I was surprised that Petaline and Inara had that distance between them then thought it made it all seem so much more real, not everyone likes everyone else and some friction tends to bring a truer voice. Inara's thoughts about Nandi and her own jealously over Mal finding a spark of comfort with someone not her at least seems to have had the positive outcome of bringing her to a point where she can allow herself to have a relationship with him that isn't just about the sex. Neat-o. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Saturday, 24 March 2007 04:10
Masterful bit of work here, Kaynara...and I have to chime with the others when they talk about the effect of having the post-BDM crew come back to the Heart of Gold and explore how things have changed or stayed the same for both the crew and the staff of the Heart of Gold.

Gotta say though that dangling the idea that "Nandi" was not her real name and having both Inara and Mal see it is quite evil...but in a good way. Such a small thing goes a long way to building a subtle mystique to the Guild and how it operates by suggesting that it assigns its trainees new names for their presumed future service. Also impressed by how you had Inara think and start dealing with how it's not the sex that truly upset her but the knowledge that Mal trusted Nandi with information about his life and times before he met Inara, but not her....realistic, complex and totally in character;D

BEB
Saturday, 24 March 2007 04:22
My favorite fics are the ones that feel so right for the characters that I sometimes forget they aren't canon. Now that I've read this, it's hard to imagine any other state of affairs for our BDHs. I like the place that Mal and Inara are in here--they're both learning their way around a real relationship for the first time in years. They clearly enjoy each other, but they've both got lotsa issues, and you give them the weight they deserve.
I like that you touched on Mal's relationship with River, which is one of my favorites in the series. The line about waiting an hour to swim was priceless.
Someone else mentioned that the Inara/Petaline dynamic felt realistic. I can certainly see how Inara might resent a woman whom she feels cost her a friend. Way to not sugarcoat things.
Only shadow of a complaint would be that I don't think Mal would say "wanna make out?" in River's hearing. And that's a bitty little quibble.
Thank you so much for a good read.
Saturday, 24 March 2007 05:25
This was so stark and realistic and just...I loved a damaged Inara more than anything, because it just feels so real to me. Someone that outwardly perfect is just waiting to be dissected on the inside. You do it perfectly. I think you write Inara very spot-on, and your Mal has some shining moments as well, namely the "wanna make out" and the lost in the woodsyness of him being River's father-figure.

There's a lot I love about this, and I have a tremendous amounf ot respect for the easy way you seem to achieve insight into a very difficult character to decipher. Kudos!
Saturday, 24 March 2007 12:04
Lovely work, Kaynara! It's always a happy day when you post.
Sunday, 25 March 2007 19:37
"No speeding," "- slow the hell down!"

"you're yelling"

love the Mal and River bickering...very sweet and true to life. I like how you just let River be a teenage girl here...with all the awkward first sexual contact. And how she has a distinct and different relationship with Inara than her relationship with Mal. I can see the three of them (post BDM) almost forming their own little emotional triad within the larger family)

As usual, you've written Inara's POV beautifully. I have to agree with the others that have commented, my favorite Inara is the unraveled one. I'm not sure if that makes her any less of a mystery or more of an enigma.

WHELP
Monday, 26 March 2007 04:27
I liked it, a bit bleak but hey, you gotta plump the depths of a character's feelings every now and then eh? Fun times
KAYLEELILITH89
Monday, 26 March 2007 04:41
I like how you keep Mal/Inara relationship still a kind of a mystery, I mean you know there together but you don't know there next step.

Brilliant, job on writing River I thought her character in thie was hilarious.

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