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Unfinished Business -- Chapter Five

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Second Opinion

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 4496    RATING: 9.0 (G)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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Unfinished Business

Chapter Five

“I don’t know why you had to come along,” Simon said, sullenly, as the shuttle took flight, River at the stick.

“Cap’n ain’t about to let his shuttle go wanderin’ off without some . . . responsible supervision,” Kaylee replied, looking out the window. “Don’t take it personal. He wouldn’t let me take it out alone, either.”

They sat in a stony silence as River adjusted her altitude. She wore her ‘piloting’ helmet, with the goggles up, and hadn’t said a word since the other two had entered and strapped in.

They were still fighting.

Kaylee had found some old friends that she barely knew and had gotten thoroughly drunk, stumbling back to Serenity in the meager hours before dawn, incoherent but unmolested. She had protested mightily when River had shaken her awake this morning, but she had promised she would go with her. In truth she was still a bit drunk.

For his part, Simon had taken a few extra shifts in the first aid tent, where he saw to all manner of minor wounds that happen when you mix alcohol, drugs, and heavy equipment together out in the middle of the rugged wilderness – mostly sprains and cuts. He actually enjoyed it more than he thought he would – it was the closest thing to an emergency room he’d seen in a year, and he didn’t have to worry about the Feds coming after him while he practiced medicine. And, of course, the utter lack of paperwork made it professional bliss.

He was surprised at the mixed proficiencies of the other two medics on duty – they had extremely strong clinical skills, but their scientific knowledge was lacking more than he was used to in colleagues. One had been a field medic during the war with a mobile surgical hospital, the other had been a commercial corporate transport medic until he had been caught smuggling narcotics, and had to enter the demimonde. Still, Simon learned a lot about ‘space medicine’, as the two talked shop, telling war stories all night.

He got to bed significantly earlier than Kaylee, and had

Comments
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 16:12
Special thanks to Juul for the review of Spellmonger (in the comment section of Chapter Four). If you're interested in reading a pretty good book about wizards and goblins (it's better than it sounds, I promise!) then you can find it here:

http://www.lulu.com/content/436079

So many of you have wished that you could somehow compensate me for all of my hard work . . . this is one way. And you get a darn fine book about wizards and goblins, too.

Next chapter: Zoe takes her own trip.

How am I doing?

ScrewtheAlliance
KITTYKAT26
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 16:21
I'll definately be buying your book to support you. As usual, your work is creative,riveting and I can just picture it in my mind! ;)
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 16:31
I loved Dr Shin. What a warm, sensible humanitarian of a doctor - his diagnosis of River was really well charted and his advice to Simon perfect. I especially loved his telling Simon to stop grieving for the girl River had been and start getting to know her as she is now. Couldn't have put it better myself, Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 16:33
Really heavy with the medicine, but very interesting explanation of all that's happened to River. And I think you've captured Simon's inability to see her as anything other than his 14-year-old sister ... the poor guy - he thought for sure he could get her back, but he's missing the point.

He did more for her in getting her out of that place and giving her a home than any surgery could hope to accomplish!

More please!
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 16:53
OK, Simon. You made your point last night, and I think even Mal agreed with you. Now you're just pissing everybody off.

I wince everytime SImon opens his mouth now. I think a lot of us go for the "true love forever" concept with Kaylee, but in here there seems to be the very real chance she'll get fed up with him completely and kick him out the airlock.

And now he has to learn to deal with not being able to fix River. I forsee a rough few chapters for the doctor.

How's Mal doing with his rousing party? For some reason, party-Mal cracks me up.
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 19:01
Great as always and your other book is on my list of things to buy. Like your writing enough to give it a try. With what has happened lately the dynamic of the crew should be interasting with Simon trying to cope with this new information and fix things tih Kaylee. Not to mention when kaylee tells the rest of the crew, wonder if they will take that as a good or bad sign about river that thats it. From here on out she just has to learn to deal with things.
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 19:08
Facinating stuff...

"Try to stop grieving for the little girl you knew, and start getting to know the young woman who’s here, now."

Love it.

And... Zoe next? Ouch.

But a "looking forward to it" ouch ;)
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 19:17
Oh my God, the first part has to be the best fight I have ever read in a work of fiction. And then the second part is the best medical description I've read of River's mental state.

Love Dr. Shin. You have a fabulous way of creating the most marvellous original characters.

Gotta confess, if the price is Kaylee no longer thinks Simon is so swai in return for getting more of these 3-way fight scenes, then by all means make Simon a lonely man.
GGCRONO
Wednesday, 18 October 2006 22:15
I, too, shall be purchacing this here goblin/wizard book as soon as I have a bit more coin to chuck 'round.

As to how you're doing? Pretty damn well, I'd say. Please continue to do so. :)
Thursday, 19 October 2006 03:41
Oh...you doing mighty fine, Screw! Wait...more than fine...brilliant! I honestly was busting a gut from the 3-way snipefest during the shuttle ride, especially during the parts where Kaylee (or was it River?) remarking she burned through her pity during a pitstop to the commode;D

And thank you Jesus! Simon finally gets clued in by a medical professional that River's been badly fucked with (pardon my obscenity) and she's gotta learn how to deal on her own. No magic surgery...no wonder drug...just time, supportive family and living life the best way she can! Bring on the chapters filled with Simon's slow and hilariously painful coping, Kaylee's frustration and River's countdown to the big 1-8:D

BEB
Thursday, 19 October 2006 17:14
The 'fight' was wonderfully written as was the whole scene with Dr. Shin. Hope Simon isn't too stubborn and takes the man's diagnosis to heart.

Simon and Kaylee definitely need to sit down and talk. But no doubt you'll drag out their arguement to keep the tension level high. Every relationship has its highs and lows, and it'll be interesting to see how you resolve this little rift between them.
NEILEI
Friday, 20 October 2006 02:57
This chapter was great fun too. I am still missing Wash somethin awful and am hurtin with Zoe, but I loved the by-play between the two doctors:
And . . . well, for the last month or so, she’s been our pilot. I don’t mind telling you, that makes me nervous sometimes.”

“Actually, with her reflexes and cognative abilities, she’s probably the best pilot in the Black already. I’d take it as a good sign. I’d even encourage it. But I won’t lie to you: she’s a wild card. She’ll have quirky little issues and bizarre personality idiosyncrices for years to come.

I can just see River as the best pilot in the black. The Kaylee/Simon/River dialogue was so true to the characters, and I am about as irritated with Simon as they are.

I am enjoying this corner of the 'verse that you have made. Very Shiny - Let's all be bad guys!
Friday, 20 October 2006 06:34
I have said this before, but it bears repeating, your writing is wonderful! It makes my day when I see that there is a brand new chapter waiting to be devoured. Thank you, from a grateful reader.
Friday, 20 October 2006 06:49
A passionate writer will go to the trouble to research something like neurology, certainly well enough to spend several convincing paragraphs. Assuming, of course, you don't already have a degree. I love that you don't resort to handwaving or just ignoring detail issues, but give your readers an honest effort, successfully. And this is on top of authentic characterization.

I so love your stories.
Friday, 20 October 2006 11:59
Heh. My degree is in Religious Studies, but my wife worked in a Neurology lab at Duke, working on Alzheimer's research for two years. She helped me with some hard stuff, and then Wiki and a few other sites supplied some details. But I can't stand "Black Box" writing. Remember, "God is in the Details."



Or, was that, "The Devil is in the Details"? I forget.

Thanks for the comments. Good ego strokes means more chapters quicker.

Screw
Monday, 13 November 2006 07:36
Yeeeah. Um, I didn't understand a whole lot of that. Too much hippocampus. But I do dearly love Shin. It seems to me that he's saying a lot of the things Campbell was saying the last time he opined on the subject of River.

Off that subject, the three-way fight is the shuttle was just plain lovely.

BTW: I thought we HAD the Devil vs. God Re: Details discussion already! It made Book throw up his hands, remember? ;)
Friday, 29 December 2006 17:02
“No,” Simon said, crossly, “let my parents sleep in on the Saturday she was conceived.”
he knows it was a saturday? strange boy...and mmm, medical-y stuff. makes my brain do a dance of joy.

b

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