Not Mine : All the characters and little plot references belong to Joss and Co.

Just a Note : *** = flashback or scene skip

***** Mal’s voice dropped to the tone that made something inside her flutter, “Inara, I ain’t lookin’ for nothin’ from you,” he told her as he took hold of the pole and swung around to within inches of her. He lowered his hand to stroke his fingertips along the railing beside her, “I’m just feelin’ kinda truthsome right now, and I..”

She swallowed, falling prey to the image of his fingertips stroking along her skin, and damned her all too vivid imagination as she returned to the sound of his voice, “...Life’s just too damn short for ifs and maybes.”

From deep within her Inara found her voice to respond, “I learned something from Nandi, not just from what happened, but from her. The family she made, the strength of her love for them, it’s what kept them together.”

She felt naked before him, stripped bare by the depth of emotion in his voice , left to stand before the Captain without her practiced guard, she feared her true feeling were now all too clear to him. She slowly lifted her dark eyes to face him, “When you live with that kind of strength you get tied to it. You can’t break away, and you never want to.”

Mal’s hand tightened it’s grip on the cold railing beside him. A noose, not dissimilar to the invisible one causing a lump in his throat and stealing his breath.

“There’s something I should have done a long time ago,” she said softly, “And I’m sorry for both of us that it took me this long...I’m leaving.”

She turned from him, tears welling in her eyes and walked away, leaving him rooted to his position without the strength to call after her.*****

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Inara folded her arms, wrapping her golden robe around her ivory floor length nightgown as the memory returned to her. She could see the heartache in his eyes all over again. Caused by her. She hadn’t meant it as retribution for her own pain