Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

I killed the ship that killed us

Sunday, July 16, 2006

Middle of the night story telling. I'm bored and this got stuck in my head. No beta obviously. Book's POV of the attack at Haven. One shot. Stole some dialouge from the BDM. Ratings would be shiny. Comments would be shinier.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2903    RATING: 9.0 (PG)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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It's not cold. Not really. Wasn't warm either. Truth be told there wasn't much of anything to feel. Actually, there was nothing. No heat, no cold, no softness or hardness, no sense of gravity, no light glowing through the lids of his eyes, no wind. "What place has no wind?" he wondered. With that, he opened his eyes.

And then he remembered.

He remember the first scream. It seemed out of place for where they lived. It was always quiet there. It was never silent though; there was always the hum of the pump, the breeze which was always present in the valley. Laughter that would sometimes echo through the buildings made roughly of sheet metal and clay, through the hills made of stone, through the mine shafts that wormed their way into the belly of the moon.

The first scream though, it shook him. A level within himself, a level he never visited willingly, recognized that scream. Barely, almost unconsciously, he thought of how the others wouldn't place it's meaning immediately. But he knew - it was the sound of fear of the unknown coupled with the sound of the species desire to survive. It was the scream of a person who suddenly felt cheated out of their life. It was the scream of someone who felt betrayed by fate.

Already running he knew that his community, his new family had not even registered the gravity of the situation. He ran. His body which he kept in shape moved with the grace that never really left him. The strength he cultivated when it seemed to no longer have a purpose. And then the screams coupled with the sounds of metals screaming through the air. Metal that embedded itself in dirt, ricocheted off of rock, burrowed into flesh. Those sounds danced in the air partnered with the screams of panic.

Time slowed. It was a short distance, his legs pumping to the turret. Such a short distance, such a short amount of time... yet his mind managed to spin on so many thoughts. He thought of the danger of the shuttle, the whine of it's engine as it turned to make another attack. He recognized the soun

Comments
Sunday, 16 July 2006 10:54
Absolutely stunning! I so totally loved this, every word and every line perfect. I loved the insight into Book and his familiarity with the hand of death from what is now his enemy, seeing it from the other side of the fence as it were. Explains so much about how he knows so much about guns and the inner workings of the Alliance without having to scroll through reams of exposition. So very neatly put and the emotional tag at the end made me want to cry. Bravo, Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Sunday, 16 July 2006 11:40
That was absolutely amazing ECAmber i mean you really nailed this, and the syncing of the movie and your story is great really lived in stuff. It would have made a great scene.
Sunday, 16 July 2006 16:25
This was some great imagery here. How you wove it into the scene we actually saw in the movie was wonderfully done.
Sunday, 16 July 2006 16:32
Phenomenal. It was amazing, and engaging, and I was afraid there, at the end, with the repitition of the "It's not cold. Not really. Wasn't warm either. Truth be told there wasn't much of anything to feel. Actually, there was nothing. No heat, no cold, no softness or hardness, no sense of gravity, no light glowing through the lids of his eyes, no wind. "What place has no wind?" he wondered. With that, he opened his eyes." line, that maybe he would relive that scene over and over again.

amzing
Sunday, 16 July 2006 18:59
Oh...I seriously hope Book doesn't have to relive shooting down that attack shuttle repeatedly as pennance....he deserves some better:(

Still...this fic was amazing in it's natural study of Book and his thoughts about returning to an older self in order to defend his newer self and his loved ones:)

BEB
Monday, 17 July 2006 06:26
Wow! Thanks everyone for such generous and kind feedback! I feel like there's something here I should add, for whatever it's worth.

As I've reread this I realize that I've had a hate/love relationship with this story. I really think it's one of my better ones (one of the best truth be told). But I HATE the implications (that yes, Book does repeat this scene as pennance). I agree, Book deserves so much better and I wish it had ended differently. But this is a story that wrote itself. In my world Book isn't even dead, or if he has to die then he's in the best of all places possible. This is one of those dark one shots where hope just isn't given to the reader. Maybe, in a way, it makes it more powerful. Anyway, glad you enjoyed reading it and thanks again for the feedback!
Monday, 17 July 2006 17:35
"You've made people scream like this,"
-I loved this line, as we all know he is a Shepherd partially because of his past sins (he used to be a BlueHand in my story).

I really like the descriptive language you used in this fic. I have never read any of your stuff before but when I get the chance I will probably go check it all out.

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