Time to Go. (public service message: this may be a goodbye thread)

POSTED BY: RionaEire
UPDATED: Monday, April 8, 2013 20:12
VIEWED: 19952
PAGE 3 of 8

PREV PAGE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 NEXT PAGE

NIKI2

Thursday, March 21, 2013 12:30 AM

"You too planned to leave because of your disagreement with one person as I recall not so very long ago." The DIFFERENCE, dear, is that Frem said quite deliberately vicious things about and to me, accused me of having a hidden agenda, of having lied (more than once), and many, many more very overt things, all of which were demonstrably not true and I carefully chronicled where he was wrong. Most especially he claimed I posted something AFTER it had been proven wrong, which was flat-out untrue and easily shown to be so.

Cav, by contrast, offered an opinion, a slightly sharp one perhaps, but not overtly vicious in any way. To compare the two is laughable.

I also spent considerable time and effort trying to sort things out with Frem, explaining how he'd misunderstood and even attempted to sort it out with him in private. You took one post and ran with it as an excuse to completely quit the forum; you have every right to do so, no disagreement, this place isn't necessarily healthy we all agree. But to see the reason you give for being so upset and feeling you need to leave made me shake my head. It doesn't make a lot of sense.

You have every right to leave or stay, I'm not saying you should do either, I just think it's pretty silly to take such offense and make such a big deal out of it, compared to all the truly offensive and insulting things that fly left and right around here--and you did write somewhere that "people" were cruel or unkind or something about a personal experience you shared...that just doesn't jive with what actually happened.

Never said you shouldn't be insulted, Byte. SNARKED that you felt insulted in another thread, when by far the most insulting things had been said to and about us on the other side and the remarks you found insulting weren't even directed at you.

Am I feeling well? Cute. Nice try, but better players have done it more effectively. And less transparently. I feel fine; what I am is suddenly very sick of the games I think both of you play and how you back one another up, and just today, less willing to be charitable toward people who play little games. Tomorrow I will make more effort to be pleasant.

But today, "2 years of my emotional investment in a community", that just makes me giggle. What exactly are we supposed to provide as a "return" on that "investment"? I guess I didn't get the contract, 'cuz folks, if this place is an "investment" for you, hooo, boy, we're the LEAST of your problems! I just envision some kind of huffy middle-aged woman with her nose in the air, "well, I NEVER...!"

What a laugh. I'm outta here. Enjoy your huff.

BYTEMITE

Thursday, March 21, 2013 2:03 AM

Niki, listen to me, I'm dead serious here. I took out the "are you feeling well" thing in my previous post precisely because I didn't want to come across that way, but I'm very concerned.

You're starting to sound like me, and it is freaking me out. In fact, a lot of people on the board are. This is either some kind of "giving me a taste of my own medicine thing" or I have done something very, very wrong.

And the second alternative is too horrifying for me to ignore.

It has suddenly become blindingly obvious that I am a bad influence on this board, and that there's only one thing I can do that will help.

I am very, very sorry. For everything.

MAL4PREZ

Thursday, March 21, 2013 2:19 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by BYTEMITE:
Niki, listen to me, I'm dead serious here.

You're starting to sound like me, and it is freaking me out. In fact, a lot of people on the board are. This is either some kind of "giving me a taste of my own medicine thing" or I have done something very, very wrong.

And the second alternative is too horrifying for me to ignore.

That you're imagining things? You are. Well, not imagining, but misinterpreting.

If you ever had any respect for me, believe this now: there is no problem with you. You don't need to be a part of the little bout going on in other threads. I find you much more open minded and flexible than CTS, and I wish you had not taken any of my statements to her as applicable to you.

You said it yourself: you do NOT have the beliefs as her. (I should be saying this there - maybe I'll cross post.) You don't blame a voter for everything that goes wrong based on a single vote. So why did you take my criticisms or that statement on yourself?

Really, you are not a problem here, and you are not a bad influence. The only one making that judgement of yourself is you. Like all of us, everything you experience goes through a filter. Your filter is quite strong though. Your self-hatred is hurting you more than anyone else ever could.

I have never seen anyone on these boards get down on you like you get down on yourself. I wished you'd cut yourself some slack!

RIONAEIRE

Thursday, March 21, 2013 4:24 AM

Byte, I know you feel like what you wrote above, but I doubt that your influence could rub off enough on people on here to be the cause of unrest in this thread or others. I for one have never felt your influence to be harmful to me personally in any way, I know that it does feel quite volitile around here for now, but it always blows over I guess. I bet tomorrow or in a few days everyone will be back to how they normally are. If its anyone's fault it is mine, I've stirred the pot so to speak. But after this thread I won't be on here to stir the pot anymore, so others will have to stir it instead. I don't think you're the one who stirred it today though, at least not in this thread.

"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya

MAGONSDAUGHTER

Thursday, March 21, 2013 6:31 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by BYTEMITE:
Niki, I think that Riona is someone with such a personality and upbringing that she's really not used to people disagreeing with her, so when it happens, it becomes actually quite upsetting even if there wasn't any negativity that we intended.

Yeah, I think that is true for some people, Byte. Nicely put.

I guess all of us have to work out whether this forum is useful of destructive for us personally and whether we want to participate in it or whether we need a break.

Personally, I found this to be a very contructive forum (for myself at least). I haven't felt attacked, except for Kane maybe, but he was nuts. Even PN can occasionally be amusing.

NIKI2

Thursday, March 21, 2013 4:26 PM

Geeez, Byte, get a grip! First and foremost, don't bother getting "concerned", we're not friends and I'm not going to spend time trying to make you feel good. I certainly don't look to YOU to tell me I'm doing fine with my bipolarity--you might as well have said it straight out, your efforts at subtlety were pathetic. I'm just fine--the only difference now is that I'm aware my frustration level goes up faster; it's no problem, I just don't choose to pussy-foot around at the moment. I don't respect people who play games; I respect people who are up front and honest, and you two haven't been, in setting up little "experiments" and judging us all...especially Riona, trashing the entire membership because Cav made some remark that hurt her feelings. Good gawd. Talk about a "poor me" thread!

There's no way I sound like you, you're all about how horrible you are, how evil and dangerous and so forth and we'd just better watch out! I don't threaten anyone, I don't play games or set up tests for people like you do, and I'm certainly not interested in giving you a taste of whatever you think is your own "medicine"...you sure do take things personally!

Mal4 is right; neither you nor anyone else here is important enough on their own to change anything...I'm amazed you think you're that powerful! No, I'm not...see above paragraph. Don't give yourself so much self-importance, kiddo, NOBODY here is that important.

"A lot"? I find that hard if not impossible to believe, and they must all be talking to you off the forum, because there's nothing here and what I'M getting in PM and e-mail is exactly the opposite.

If what you said about Riona and disagreement is true, this is the LAST place on Gawd's Green Earth she belongs! She's more than welcome to get offended or insulted by me, as is anyone, but it's pretty ridiculous to say what Cav wrote is driving her off the board or complain about what she got for an "emotional investment" in this place, and even moreso to claim that she was mistreated/attacked/whatever for her personal experience in that other thread. It simply IS NOT THERE! It's about as reasonable a thread as any I've seen here, and I find the timing and her claims highly suspect, that's all.

I've never figured what the hell you get out of trashing yourself CONSTANTLY, and I'm not nearly as nice as Mal4; I think quite possibly it's some kind of subconscious desire to be more important than you think you are, or gain pity, or something--hell, I duno, but it's pretty silly and you've been doing it for a long time. By now you're WELL aware that insisting you're some kind of monster gets no response except for people to tell you you're not and for those who are kind to feel bad for you and wish you'd like yourself more. In my opinion, you have something invested in your "monster" personna, and you state quite clearly that you have no intention of ever doing anything to try and make yourself happier. So what your purpose is in continuing your claims escapes me. It does something for you, obviously, or you wouldn't keep it up, but nobody's buying it, and you don't influence anything any more than does anyone else.

All this is just plain silly and we've all wasted far more time on it than it deserves. I'd like to get back to the far more interesting real world, so go right on with your games, I hope they give you whatever it is you seek.

BYTEMITE

Friday, March 22, 2013 5:05 PM

I did not know that your medications had changed, and I was not asking about your bipolar disorder or making snide insinuations. It hadn't even occurred to me that this could be anything to do with bipolar disorder. And I do not use people's struggles with mental illness as ammunition against them in an argument.

You were acting unusually, from my experience with your usual composed behaviour, and so I asked. I wanted to know if something had you stressed out, or if something had happened to you or a friend. Sometimes it pays to not assume that someone's behaviour is entirely the result of oneself or arguments at hand when that behaviour is upsetting.

My threats were never serious - and generally either excuses to post silly pictures or deliberate attempts to foster dislike towards myself. As for my little games, and my little girl immaturity, I can assure you. I have ALWAYS been upfront and honest about all of them. And that the only games that I played with YOU were the ones where I was TRYING to burn my bridges, and where I said as much. It has never been about judging people or hurting people, and there was a long time there where I was trying to do everything I could to tell you all that I can be controlling and that I was concerned I might be a sociopath.

My fun little games are the ones where I lose. I have nothing to gain here, and I can see that my behaviour has been more destructive than I ever anticipated.

SIGNYM

Friday, March 22, 2013 5:29 PM

RIONA

Quote:
Upon further reflection, Cav is definitely who I'm really mad at, he insinuated that I don't care about Irish culture

I think what he said... along with many others who said the same thing... is that you don't KNOW Irish culture. You know only what pleases you. If you re-read the posts in that thread with that interpretation in mind, I think you will see this in many of the responses, just phrased more gently.

NIKI2

Friday, March 22, 2013 6:43 PM

Quote:
Niki, listen to me, I'm dead serious here....I'm very concerned.... and it is freaking me out...And the second alternative is too horrifying for me to ignore.

Quote:
I wanted to know if something had you stressed out, or if something had happened to you or a friend.

The two do not jive.

Here I had hoped this silly thread had managed to die for lack of interest. You should let it do so.

CAPTAINCRUNCH

Friday, March 22, 2013 6:49 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by SIGNYM:
RIONA
Quote:
Upon further reflection, Cav is definitely who I'm really mad at, he insinuated that I don't care about Irish culture
I think what he said... along with many others who said the same thing... is that you don't KNOW Irish culture. You know only what pleases you. If you re-read the posts in that thread with that interpretation in mind, I think you will see this in many of the responses, just phrased more gently.

There are many ways to inspire people to learn more. Cav's was the the dismissive, shoddy, can't-be-bothered-I'm-going-to-score-some-points-on-you selfish way. Frem on the other hand is great when he tries to impart wisdom, it's like he's bringing you something special, a cake even, not trying to belittle like Cav did. Does Cav KNOW Irish culture? That's a pretty big thing to know.

PREV PAGE 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 NEXT PAGE