Silly Subplots
POSTED BY: Zicsoft
UPDATED: Wednesday, March 29, 2006 17:14
VIEWED: 11710
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Shows like Firefly need lots of silly subplots. Here's my submission.
One day while Serenity is parked at a busy spaceport, a cat sneaks aboard and makes itself at home. This little stowaway is discovered once the ship is back in deep space, and is wildly popular. Kaylee goes all googoo with it. Book saves it choice scraps from the kitchen. Even Jayne is known to talk to it when he thinks nobody's listening.
The one holdout is Mal, who hates cats, and would like nothing better than to stuff this one out an airlock. Only fear of a mutiny prevents him from doing so. So of course the cat, with the famous perversity of its species, attaches itself to the captain, following him around, cuddling up to him whenever he sits down. At first he shoos it away loudly, but unpleased looks from the crew force him to grit his teeth and try to ignore this little shadow.
At the end of the ep, Mal's had a particularly bad day, has had fights with everybody else on board, Lonely, depressed, and exhausted, he goes to his cabin, and flops down on his bunk. Immediately, the cat joins him. He starts to chase it away, but then grudgingly makes room for it. As we blackout, he's seen scratching the cat between the ears -- and talking to it.
JOSH, WHERE'S MY CHECK???!!!
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Yes, Joss.
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Dammit, Z! That was my idea. Except in my version it was a futuristic space kitty with two heads. And Jayne was allergic to it so he had to take off all his clothes so Kaylee could rub him down with Calamine and then...
"I was gonna get me an ear, too." - Jayne
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Actually I can see this happening, especially in (hopefully) future seasons. With Joss I wouldn't be surprised.
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"How will this end?"
"In fire."
--Babylon 5, 'The Coming of Shadows'
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No two-headed space kitties allowed in this universe, sorry. I guess psychic kitties are OK, as long as their eyes don't glow.
JOSH, WHERE'S MY CHECK???!!!
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Okay, the kittie will have one head only. Hey, maybe they could get the invisible Miss Kitty Fantastico to guest star. As long as Jayne still gets naked.
"I was gonna get me an ear, too." - Jayne
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Quote:
Originally posted by JaynesGirlfriend:
Hey, maybe they could get the invisible Miss Kitty Fantastico to guest star.
Whatever happened to MKF anyway? She was one of the most awesomeest characters ever.
________________
"I love to see a young girl go out and grab the world by the lapels. Life’s a bitch. You’ve got to go out and kick ass." —Maya Angelou
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Here's what I will add (cat lover's
please pardon)...
Simon, the ship's doctor - who has part of his lineage of southern Asian descent, gathers up some medicinal herbs from the ship's stores; and, to the rest of the crew's delight, creates a wonderful cantonese dish of Tiger, Phoenix, and Dragon. Only one crew member objects, claiming a bias against the diffusion of Asian influence for the last 400 years; but was subsequently made to walk the plank.
subplot of subplot...
quite apparently, a mutant strain of spacefaring "mad cat disease" was introduced aboard after the consumption of the aforementioned delicacy. Mad Cats, as you might well know, affects not the brain, but the reproductive systems - it also shortens the gestation period of the host. As you would imagine, the effect is quite pronounced on species with much shorter gestation periods. Within the matter of weeks, everyone onboard finds that they are pregnant and the entire ship is filled with fur balls.
Oh wait, I guess that one has already been done in about 18 different episodes of ST.
Quote:
Originally posted by Zicsoft:
Shows like Firefly need lots of silly subplots. Here's my submission.
One day while Serenity is parked at a busy spaceport, a cat sneaks aboard and makes itself at home. This little stowaway is discovered once the ship is back in deep space, and is wildly popular. Kaylee goes all googoo with it. Book saves it choice scraps from the kitchen. Even Jayne is known to talk to it when he thinks nobody's listening.
The one holdout is Mal, who hates cats, and would like nothing better than to stuff this one out an airlock. Only fear of a mutiny prevents him from doing so. So of course the cat, with the famous perversity of its species, attaches itself to the captain, following him around, cuddling up to him whenever he sits down. At first he shoos it away loudly, but unpleased looks from the crew force him to grit his teeth and try to ignore this little shadow.
At the end of the ep, Mal's had a particularly bad day, has had fights with everybody else on board, Lonely, depressed, and exhausted, he goes to his cabin, and flops down on his bunk. Immediately, the cat joins him. He starts to chase it away, but then grudgingly makes room for it. As we blackout, he's seen scratching the cat between the ears -- and talking to it.
JOSH, WHERE'S MY CHECK???!!!
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Okay, I just read Shack's recap over at TWOP and as well as being evidence that I'm not the only one who thinks Adam Baldwin's a honey it reminded me of the most obvious and inevitable of silly subplots. We all know Kaylee's a pretty girl. Girly's a hottie, but apparently the show doesn't want us to know that yet. Eventually however Kaylee's going to have to be made over so the viewers can be shocked at how darn pretty that girl is.
And what better way to do that than to have Kaylee masquerade as a Companion? Kaylee all done up like Inara plus she's gotta fend off unwanted sexual advances? That's what I call funny, folks! Or sexual harrassment, take your pick.
"I was gonna get me an ear, too." - Jayne
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Quote:Actually, Jewel Staite could have just as easily been cast as Inara -- before she put on the extra weight she needed to play Kaylee. But if Kaylee were to pose as a companion, it'd be a bit too campy.
Originally posted by JaynesGirlfriend:
And what better way to do that than to have Kaylee masquerade as a Companion? Kaylee all done up like Inara plus she's gotta fend off unwanted sexual advances? That's what I call funny, folks! Or sexual harrassment, take your pick.
This business of Kaylee's chubbiness makes me think Whedon wants to do some stories where a woman's self-image is an issue. This is the sort of thing he would have been into when he minored in Women's Studies, and obviously what he hand in mind with his first choice for the actress to play Willow -- a stocky, conspicuously Jewish-American actress. The network wanted somebody more glamorous and less ethnic. Allyson Hannigan was the resulting comprimise.
JOSH, WHERE'S MY CHECK???!!!
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