Ni ta ma de tian xia suo you de ren dou gai si.

Jayne took another pull from the bottle in his hand. He couldn’t get the picture of River’s back outta his brain.

He didn’t mean to hurt her. That was the whole idea of buyin’ a whore in the first place, so he could get rid of some of that heat that was burnin’ him up without hurtin’ her. Without makin’ things too complicated.

Fei hua. Things was already complicated.

He put his head on the table, resting his forehead in the crook of his arm.

There she was. Hair swingin’. Runnin’ like she was bein’ chased.

He wondered if it shoulda been him chasin’ her, ‘stead a the doc.

He lifted his head back up after a minute. Looked at the barman, who looked back at him real bored.

“Don’ worry. I ain’t gonna-“ he sat up. The bar pitched and rolled. He watched it until it settled back down, then looked back at the barman. “I ain’t gonna wax all poetical atcha. But I reckon… I reckon you should be made awares that change… things changin’… is a tah mah de.”

The barman’s face didn’t move. Jayne didn’t know if he hadn’t heard him or hadn’t understood him or if he’d forgot to speak aloud. Didn’t much care.

He took another drink. Had some idea of fallin backwards an’ didn’t remember much else.

***

River didn’t leave her room. Not when Simon tried to bait her with leftover birthday cake. Not when she heard two people dragging someone down the hall and tossing that someone on Jayne’s bed.

Not when she got messy images of arms and legs and her hair swinging as she ran and she knew he was dreaming about her.

There was a knock at the door. Simon pushed it open when she didn’t answer.

“Mei mei?”

She knew how strange she looked. Felt his concern as he looked at her. She was sitting on the bed, turned away from the door, cradling her hand in her lap. She was staring at her palm.

Wondering if he was still there, under her fingernails.

“Lily’s invited all of us to dinner. No doubt she wants us to help clean up after las