Spinning Out-Chapter 01:
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
3 months post BDM. The crew of Serenity lands on Persephone for the first time in five months and finds they need to come up with new papers on the ship or have their home impounded by Eavesdown Port Authority. Mal talks to the entire crew before an inspection of the ship. PG-for mild language, adult content, and angsty character developement. 2,700 words.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 3410 RATING: 9.0 (PG) SERIES: FIREFLY
Spinning Out
By
GoramMan
Chapter 1: Port Introspection
Mal massaged his temples, “I’m real sorry but we just weren’t around when the new rules came. We haven’t found our way back to Persephone for almost five months. If you would just let us land I’m sure we can suss it all out.” He was pleading with the Eavesdown Port Authority. They wouldn’t allow Serenity to land without a new registration.
The woman on the screen scowled at him in total apathy, “In that case sir, you will need to purchase a temporary registration wavier. They are fully refundable once you have your required papers.”
“And just as before, lay’n 800 down on that piece of paper makes it impossible to get the other piece of paper, not to mention food and fuel to make the visit worth while. Look please, I can understand your situation. But we have a situation too. That situation gets added to your situation if we’re put on the drift in lower orbit. Let us set down and find work. We can make everything right afterwards.”
The woman set her jaw forward, “Alright Captain Reynolds. We will suspend payment on the wavier but you must have everything in place by noon tomorrow. You will not be permitted to leave before then. If you fail to produce a registration to port authority by that time we will impound your ship. Thirty
Oh, and punctuation is one of my pet peeves, but I won't mark you down for that. :)
Yin-Yang, go ahead and tell me if you see some reoccuring mistakes. I'm a big boy and we will probably never meet in RL so there can be no embarrassments.
Mal's vid to Inara is novel, I haven't see that done before, I take it she is back at the Training House teaching and Mal's not completely happy with not having her with him. Yeah, I can see him being impatient with that arrangement.
A few grammatical errors, but other than that a good read.
Leiasky: It makes me happy that I have the attention of somebody such as yourself.
Nina: Thank you very much for the compliments and the correction. I spelled it in MS word like you did, I think, but it kicked out vies. That should teach me not to write and post past midnight.
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