Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

CHECK MATE: Endgame (22/22)

Thursday, September 2, 2004

A (maybe) unexpected outcome to the showdown between Mal and Simon. A revelation. A baby. And a hunt for a cure for River.
Oh and one anglo-Saxon swear word.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3982    RATING: 9.0 (PG13)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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Disclaimer: Joss is the one true author. My imitatiion is sincere flattery.

For skripka who showed me things in Firefly I might otherwise not have seen.

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CHECK MATE: Endgame.

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If it were not for the piercing screams, Kaylee might be able to persuade herself that those two sharp pops were just the engine misfiring after all its recent exertions. But screams mean trouble, an' no mistake.

Zoe, Jayne, Book and now Wash – to his immense surprise – know the sound of gunfire when they hear it. The screaming just tells them which direction to head in. Mal's bunk.

They all pile in, expecting the worst. Expecting River to have shown more deadly prowess with a firearm and fearing for Mal's life. The scene before them is something else entirely.

Simon is half-sitting, half-collapsed on Mal's desk – the blotting pad conveniently soaking up the blood spilling from a wound in his thigh – and trying to fend off the slaps his naked sister is raining down on him. “Stupid boob! Stupid. Thought we loved Daddy? No touching guns. Playing doctors, not doctors and nurses. Gave him the smoother. You said .” She picks up the empty syringe on the table beside him. “The Captain needs to rest.” Simon groans.

Mal has had time to pull on his pants but is otherwise undressed. He's clutching his upper arm tightly and glaring at his medic with ice-cold rage. A thin ribbon of red trickles out between his fingers.

“Want to tell me what's happened here, son?” Book asks mildly.

“Nothin' to earn me a place in your special hell, let me tell you that.”

Jayne isn't interested in explanations. He's on Simon in an instant. Ignoring his cry of pain, the mercenary pushes him to the ground, rolls him onto his front and pulls both arms up behind his back. He sits down heavily on the medic's back, making him wince and moan.

Mal blinks at the big man's speed and efficiency. At the way he never hesitated. If he's sometimes had doubts about Jayne's loyalty in the past, they evaporate now. Th

Comments
Thursday, 02 September 2004 12:11
Whoa... Good myth.

Thursday, 02 September 2004 12:52
Great job as usual. Loved mal's interaction w/ .... well everybody:)
Thursday, 02 September 2004 15:23
See, the only problem with a really good story is that is ends. I really enjoyed this one, and I hope you've got another one all lined up and ready to go!!!
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 02 September 2004 16:29
Good work on this one from start to finish. The characters went places I never expected they could go and I still believed it. Keep it up!
Thursday, 02 September 2004 18:03
*sniffle*!

Aawww... that was sweet, sad, funny, hopeful, satisfying... sparkly/shiny. I read slowly so as to savor in detail, knowing it was the last chapter. You brought a literal tear to my eye at the end--very powerful writing, so well done.

"Who on this boat hasn't toyed with the idea of shooting Mal at one time or another?" --Delightful way to express it, and express why they're all concerned that Simon's bleeding but no one seems much concerned that Mal got shot too.

The Wash/Zoe interaction played out well--each concerned that the other would hate him/her for the past allegiances.

"Organs other than his own?" --Total LOL moment--almost choked on my coffee! I did see you foreshadow the Simon/Mal thing in the last chapter (and quite deftly, I might add), just wasn't sure where/how you meant to play it out. I thought the whole bit was right on target, from Zoe's 'wake up moron' hint to Mal, to Mal's pushing the issue with Simon, uncomfortabling him into realizing he was off kilter about it.

"But the past is what makes us who we are" --plus Mal's hearty dose of denial that followed that line. Many layers and character depth in that small exchange. Nice.

"Mal regards her with a mixture of irritation and suspicion. What is the woman playin' at now? 'Havin' the baby, Sir' --dang! Could you have said that any better? I don't think so. It hit the mark on the characters and their relationship so precisely, concisely, and amusingly, that it struck me as a just outright masterful bit of writing.

And then the end scene... Mal seeing the others, happy and healing with he and River off to the side, disconnected, isolated, estranged, still damaged but reforming (reglueing) into something/someone new. *sniffle* again--that's the moment that really got me.

Super job, Kispexi2, thank you so much for sharing the story and sincerely hope to see more!



Thursday, 02 September 2004 18:06
And my review is darned near as long as some stories posted here! *blush* Ah, well--hit 100,000 words on my BSJ story today, guess I'm just wordy. ;-)
Thursday, 02 September 2004 19:38
Excellent, and so gorram shiny I may be blinded for WEEKS! Loved this, so many subtle little layers just adding to the whole gorgeous confection of it. Well done, can't wait to see what you come up with next. Adored the way you wrote everybody especially River. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 02 September 2004 21:18
Wow...wow. I must say, hon...that this has been one hell of a ride. Never has a story pulled me from one emotion from the next, laughter, anger, sorrow. All weaved together beautifully. The character interactions on spot, and I loved your Mal. And damn it, I need another one. Cause its damn too pretty to end here. ~LOL~ Bravo and xiexie for writing this story.

Cassandra E ~who is too lazy to log in.~
HURRYSUNDOWN
Tuesday, 07 September 2004 13:06
First of all, ditto what Guildsister said. This was one amazing story. Now for my own part, the thing that's staying with me is Zoe's bit of wisdom: "Think we're all jus' a little bit in love with the tian sa de wangba dan. Even Jayne.” Explains an awful lot about Mal's relationships with each of his crew, and the crew as a whole. Also, about "sparkly": I got the sense that "sparkly" doesn't really mean "shiny" - more that a person who is sparkly is someone who attracts everyone, sly or not, but for whatever reason, Zoe decided that "shiny" was close enough ... Anyway, this was just tops.
Thursday, 09 September 2004 11:51
Thanks to everyone for all your kind comments which sustained me when the damn words wouldn't come out right. Particularly for the detailed comments.

And yes, sparkly doesn't really mean shiny.

But that's a story that's crawling around in the darker reaches of my imagination. Not sure I want to go there yet.
HEB
Wednesday, 22 September 2004 11:59
Thanks so much for such an amazing fic!

Heb

ANONYMOUS
Sunday, 24 October 2004 10:34
You pulled me in, flew me places and made me a very happy fan.

Thank you!
Ceri
Wednesday, 04 October 2006 08:23
Just read this only now ... and, damn, I might as well give up writing now!

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