Greetings all. This one is a totally off-the-cuff invention that started tormenting me in North Carolina. I threw it together this morning at around four a.m. while sitting at a terminal in Laredo Texas, haven't really beta-ed it or anything, but it's outta my head and on your screen. Enjoy or not, as you choose.

INTERIOR SERENITY TRAILER

HFK stands before the assembled crew. Archer sits on a box nearest him, with the rest more or less settled around the folding table used for dining purposes. Behind HFK, Maguinan sits playing with a ball of yarn.

HFK

"Understand that I'm smart. 172% on the Geek test, third in my class at Delaware State, figured out exactly how the NFL quarterback rating formula works, things like that. So I say I'm smart, and you have to understand, my sister makes me look slow."

Everyone looks at Maguinan, playing with her ball of yarn. She drops it, and it rolls down past her foot, the loose end trailing behind it. Grabbing the string, she yanks it. The ball unravels further and rolls away from her foot. With a frustrated expression, she gives it another tug, same result. Finally, a look of intense determination on her face, she takes the string in both hands and gives it a mighty yank. The ball of yarn bounces, unravels quickly, and rolls right out of the trailer.

So she tugs on the string AGAIN.

Everyone looks at HFK. Maniac smirks.

HFK

"Er, she really does... or did... make me look slow."

Behind him and no longer being observed, Maguinan smiles a sneaky smile, tosses the piece of string and starts fiddling with a Rubik's Cube.

HFK

"So to start from the beginning..."

Archer puts up a hand.

Archer

"Hold on there."

He picks up a spiral notebook that has been sitting next to him.

"Figured we might save some time if we got our questions down on paper. Everybody chipped in with what they were wonderin' about."

HFK nods reluctantly.

Archer

"Okay, first question. 'Your sister is pretty hot. Is she seeing anybody?'"

Everyone tu