Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL
Back Stories I, Chapter 9/14 - Mal
Monday, May 28, 2007
Mal’s had many confusing days lately, but this one wins out.
CATEGORY: FICTION TIMES READ: 3821 RATING: 10.0 (PG13) SERIES: FIREFLY
Disclaimer: It belongs to Joss and all those business people. I’m just playing. Rating: PG to NC17. I will not put warnings on each chapter, because I don’t want to give things away. In general, don’t be getting into any of this if you’re not prepared for adult storylines, violence, explicit sexual content, and - oh my - bad words. Many thanks: to several fireflyfans.net members: and for hours of beta reading and entertaining discussions of many things. , , and provided additional beta time on the early chapters. The talented did the lovely artwork. (Ain’t it nice?) and http://www.chinesetools.com provided many colorful Chinese phrases. One of fine fics provided a useful plot bunny. (I won’t tell which yet!) Finally – kudos to for her inspirational fic . Links: Prequels: The Fish Job () () and Easy Tickets () (). Timing, pairings, and canon blurbs are in my Comments
Monday, 28 May 2007 15:49
I finally got LJ working, after many days! I think I’ve beat the spring allergies too - yay! Now there’s just the slow Memorial day coffee shop internet… it’s taken a good hour to post everything.
And so the action arrives, homespun!
Miss Jessi LOL! I knew that was your name, Jetflair, but it hadn’t occurred to me when I wrote it in here, or I would have given you a line or two! There’s no chapter for Serenity – that’s a little too much for me to handle. But I do include her in other ways.
Amdobell – still gonna be a little time for Mal. I hope it’s not too hard to read; I really am trying not to make him pathetic. But I’m fascinated with how the crew would treat such a strong man who’s been made weak by something beyond his control. It’s very illuminating of them all, and affects the whole dynamic of the crew.
NBZ – curious indeed! River is such a cat in that scene.
Katesfriend – keep track of your hints… I’m very much wondering what you’re guessing at!
BEB – you’ll just have to wait and see how deep the rabbithole goes… oh wait, rabbit holes are homepun’s thing… you know what I mean!
Platonist – re Zoë: yeah, I don’t normally see her as into Mal’s personal life, but things did happen a certain way... Anyway, I’m so glad you liked how I handled the proposal. I so think it’d be something low key and kind of silly like that.
And so the action arrives, homespun!
Miss Jessi LOL! I knew that was your name, Jetflair, but it hadn’t occurred to me when I wrote it in here, or I would have given you a line or two! There’s no chapter for Serenity – that’s a little too much for me to handle. But I do include her in other ways.
Amdobell – still gonna be a little time for Mal. I hope it’s not too hard to read; I really am trying not to make him pathetic. But I’m fascinated with how the crew would treat such a strong man who’s been made weak by something beyond his control. It’s very illuminating of them all, and affects the whole dynamic of the crew.
NBZ – curious indeed! River is such a cat in that scene.
Katesfriend – keep track of your hints… I’m very much wondering what you’re guessing at!
BEB – you’ll just have to wait and see how deep the rabbithole goes… oh wait, rabbit holes are homepun’s thing… you know what I mean!
Platonist – re Zoë: yeah, I don’t normally see her as into Mal’s personal life, but things did happen a certain way... Anyway, I’m so glad you liked how I handled the proposal. I so think it’d be something low key and kind of silly like that.
Monday, 28 May 2007 15:53
Oh My Apple Pie. This was an AWESOME chapter.
And yes, I did spend the day I was supposed to be revising catching up with all your fics. If I fail, I blame you. You and Leiasky.
Except not, cos it will totally be my fault.
Update soon!!!!!!!!!!! Ten ten ten!
xxx
And yes, I did spend the day I was supposed to be revising catching up with all your fics. If I fail, I blame you. You and Leiasky.
Except not, cos it will totally be my fault.
Update soon!!!!!!!!!!! Ten ten ten!
xxx
Monday, 28 May 2007 16:10
Oh My God. You had me in a sweat and a panic through this whole thing. Heartbreaking, scary and very, very real from his perspective. Excellent!
Now what else could go wrong?
Now what else could go wrong?
Monday, 28 May 2007 18:53
Shear Brilliance.
Can see how it is very real from his perspective. A little like the film "Memento" (but not too much).
Now that he don't recognise half his crew things are gonna get interesting.
Can see how it is very real from his perspective. A little like the film "Memento" (but not too much).
Now that he don't recognise half his crew things are gonna get interesting.
Monday, 28 May 2007 19:37
Poor Mal, you really are putting him through the wringer good and proper, and poor Zoe trying so hard to keep up the charade. What puzzles me into a coma is why the good gorram you didn't have Simon give him something to calm him down or sedate him. It's obvious the Captain is unravelling at an alarming rate and the more people won't tell him what is going on the worse it is getting. I hope Simon can figure it out soon and help him. Ali D
You can't take the sky from me
You can't take the sky from me
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 00:44
Gorramit. That is all I can say.
Actually, I lied, I can say more.
How is Zoe planning on explaining to Mal that there are 3 people on board who he's never seen before. That would confuse me mightily.
That would suck.
Still amazing!
Actually, I lied, I can say more.
How is Zoe planning on explaining to Mal that there are 3 people on board who he's never seen before. That would confuse me mightily.
That would suck.
Still amazing!
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 05:48
Tian Yesu....this was just f-ing superb, mal4prez! Honestly...watching as Mal's mental degradation increased and evolved and explored was oh so painful, but impossible to turn away from:D
I have to say that you are doing a brilliant job with subtly exploring how each remaining crewmen handles Mal's mental breakdown, and how Mal reacts to each one of their reactions. Though I have to say that River's not really living up to her supposed feelings, since I would imagine if she truly loved Mal, she would be taking a lot of walks through the good captain's casaba:S
BEB
I have to say that you are doing a brilliant job with subtly exploring how each remaining crewmen handles Mal's mental breakdown, and how Mal reacts to each one of their reactions. Though I have to say that River's not really living up to her supposed feelings, since I would imagine if she truly loved Mal, she would be taking a lot of walks through the good captain's casaba:S
BEB
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 13:09
Hey all - if you're checking back in... thanks so much for the comments! I reached a place of being sick of writing this weekend, which is bad because much is left to do with Book I. But now I'm feeling energized again! Yay!
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 15:00
Ahh, what a nice twist with Mal not remembering Simon, River and Book. I feel for Zoe, she's got so much to deal with.
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 17:18
"And so the action arrives, homespun!"
And so it does! And it was nail-biting and gut-wrenching and all those good cliches they tell us not to use.
Every time I think you have my heart broken enough, you crumble a little bit more away. This is, as always, brilliant and heart wrenching, rendered with the great detail we come to expect. The thing is, I'm so amazed at how you walk us through Mal's mind. Painful as that walk is, you make it real and you make it make sense, so we see things the way Mal sees them. And as we watch him, his instincts are there, his gut emotions, the things that make him who he is. I was so touched when he was studying Kaylee and decided she was "close, but not perfectly done," that she wasn't real because she wasn't acting like Kaylee should, wouldn't catch his eye or make small talk. I love that stripped-down Mal, trying so desperately to anchor himself to something familiar, clearly sees the unfamiliar festering in Kaylee.
I've said "poor Zoe" in just about every chapter. I'm waiting for her to break, or break something, and you've captured her becoming frayed around the edges. And then a horrible thought - God help us if Mal doesn't recognize Zoe. Zoe, or Kaylee - you take us there and my heart may not recover. And now that that window has opened, a hundred thoughts have rushed into my head... none pleasant. You, my dear, are evil! Brilliant, but evil.
And oh yeah! Wash calling Zoe to heat it up - wonderful turnabout. Plus, I'd almost forgotten about those two, I got so caught up in the hospital.
And so it does! And it was nail-biting and gut-wrenching and all those good cliches they tell us not to use.
Every time I think you have my heart broken enough, you crumble a little bit more away. This is, as always, brilliant and heart wrenching, rendered with the great detail we come to expect. The thing is, I'm so amazed at how you walk us through Mal's mind. Painful as that walk is, you make it real and you make it make sense, so we see things the way Mal sees them. And as we watch him, his instincts are there, his gut emotions, the things that make him who he is. I was so touched when he was studying Kaylee and decided she was "close, but not perfectly done," that she wasn't real because she wasn't acting like Kaylee should, wouldn't catch his eye or make small talk. I love that stripped-down Mal, trying so desperately to anchor himself to something familiar, clearly sees the unfamiliar festering in Kaylee.
I've said "poor Zoe" in just about every chapter. I'm waiting for her to break, or break something, and you've captured her becoming frayed around the edges. And then a horrible thought - God help us if Mal doesn't recognize Zoe. Zoe, or Kaylee - you take us there and my heart may not recover. And now that that window has opened, a hundred thoughts have rushed into my head... none pleasant. You, my dear, are evil! Brilliant, but evil.
And oh yeah! Wash calling Zoe to heat it up - wonderful turnabout. Plus, I'd almost forgotten about those two, I got so caught up in the hospital.
Tuesday, 29 May 2007 22:55
*claps along with everyone else* Absolutely superb, as all the above comments said. I find it so impressive how you capture all the characters' thought processes, but Mal's been the most stellar of a very good bunch so far, with the possible exception of River.
Re. homespun's comment immediately above, I see some light in the darkness. If Mal's memory shoves back far enough, Zoe'll be corporal to his private - he'll not argue about taking orders from her then. It'll at least give her a few hours to settle things down before he forgets who she is...
...though, I know where, in the reverse story timeline, his memory's going to end up next. Oh, my. *rewatches Out of Gas, but backwards*
Re. homespun's comment immediately above, I see some light in the darkness. If Mal's memory shoves back far enough, Zoe'll be corporal to his private - he'll not argue about taking orders from her then. It'll at least give her a few hours to settle things down before he forgets who she is...
...though, I know where, in the reverse story timeline, his memory's going to end up next. Oh, my. *rewatches Out of Gas, but backwards*
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