Mal Love Bots for Sale! (1/?)

Word Count: 1,418

Rating: PG-13

Author’s Note: For damiarvn, srichard, obsidianagirl

Summary: Well you read the title you get the idea. This goes from innocent to naughty. What can I say, my mind is a very weird, and twisted place.

Mal walked into Badger's office to come face to face with himself.

Clearly confused all that comes from his mouth is "Huh?"

He peers closer at the tag to find that it says:

Captain Malcolm Reynolds clone

Sold to you by Badger Industries.

Zoë’s mouth twitched and Jayne just goggled in confusion.

"What do ya think? After the hoopla you created with Miranda, all the woman are just beggin' for 'em. I figure if ya give me the rights to your image, I can make us a bleedin' fortune." Badger's accent grated on Mal's last nerve.

"What in the gorram hell do you think you're doing?"

"Turnin' a profit off that face of yours, is what. There are women out there willin' to pay a pretty penny to have their very own Malcolm Reynolds love bot."

Zoë couldn't keep the smirk from breaking across her face at Badger's words. Jayne, of course, just guffawed loud enough to wake the dead back on Miranda.

"There is no way in hell I'm gonna give you the right to sell me."

"Sir, I'm sure there's a profit to this enterprise, otherwise Badger'd have nothing to do with it."

"Exactly. I was plannin' on giving you 25% of each clone sold. That's 1,000 platinum each time. I've already got a waiting list of like 10,000."

Jayne's laughter halted when he heard the numbers and quickly added it up and figured out what his percentage of that would be. "I wouldn't mind getting my cut of that kind of action."

Mal turned a stony glare at Jayne. "Why would you get a percentage of that? It's my image being sold, not yours."

Jayne's face turned sulky, when he realized that he was getting nothin' out of the situation other than a good chuckle.

"So Reynolds, we got ourselves a deal?" Badger's beady eyes twinkled in avari