Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

NOTHIN' IN THE 'VERSE - PART I: Chapter 11

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Takes place after "War Stories". Mal is having trouble sleeping after being tortured. A passenger aboard Serenity discovers an old friend - and makes a new one.-------CHAPTER 11: The job goes off...but does it go smooth? Do they ever?

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 2559    RATING: 9.0 (PG13)    SERIES: FIREFLY

Tweet

Disclaimers : Everything belongs to Joss, except for one character of my creation.

**Mousing over the Chinese should reveal the English translations on most browsers. If not, translations follow the story.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mal grimaced and slapped a mosquito off his arm as he crouched in the brush outside the station. Ruttin’ bugs anyway. He had never developed a fondness for insects, that was for sure. How he’d ended up owning a ship named after one...

Pearl was right; the tree cover and underbrush were very dense, and Mal was having a hard time even seeing the building from where he was hidden. He was glad to have Wash and Book high in Serenity ’s cockpit, where they were able to observe what he could not.

He could hear Jayne and Zoë moving about as Jayne boosted Zoë to the roof. Mal shifted position on cramped legs, and readjusted his holster. He carried a rifle and had his service pistol on his hip. According to Pearl, there shouldn’t be anyone about, but one could never be sure in such a place as this, and Mal felt it best to be well armed.

There had been no sign of life as they landed and disembarked Serenity . As Pearl had said, the station sat by itself quite a piece from the tiny town it serviced, with nothing but a small dirt road and a lot of wooded land in between. Getting in and out without being noticed seemed like it should be a cake job, and Mal had said as much to the crew.

He rose to his feet and stretched, certain there was no one about to observe him. All was quiet by the station now; from a standing position he could see the roof, and see that there was no sign of Zoë up there. She was most likely already inside, probably heading for the door to let Jayne in.

Suddenly Mal heard a loud rustle behind the station, followed by a thud, as if something had hit the ground. He craned his neck, instinctively readying his gun. A couple softer rustles followed the first one, the

Comments
Wednesday, 13 September 2006 03:25
holy...i'm the first to post a response?! i feel honored!

okay, so still loving this...the language shocked a bit...i did like "Define 'down.'" but i'm not sure Mal would be that out of it in a panic sitch...that's his element, if you think about it...

still can't wait for the next installment!
Wednesday, 13 September 2006 03:56
I hate to comment on my own story, but...Kacidilla, you're right--Mal wouldn't normally be that out of it in such a situation, but I'm writing here of a Mal who has lost a lot of sleep and is under a lot of stress, and is not on his game. So, yeah, Mal is a bit odd in my little version of the 'verse here!
Wednesday, 13 September 2006 13:29
Oh, Alex is...gun-happy?
Looks like there may be a new Warrior Woman on the ship. A nice contrast to Mal's current meekness. Can't wait to see that conversation unfold!
Wednesday, 13 September 2006 22:49
Mal a bit out of it is what you're trying to portray, so that bit's very understandable. I do have to say though, that the "fuck" twice is out of character. Mal swears violently and creatively in chinese.....not so much with the modern English. A good stream of Chinese cursing would have been in order there.
Wednesday, 13 September 2006 23:27
yeah...sorry about that... *sheepish* momentarily forgot about the excess amounts of stress...and sleeplessness...
Saturday, 16 September 2006 04:33
I don't know about that, jetflair. If one reads the "Serenity" novelization by Keith R.A. DeCandido, the speech Mal gives to the crew on Haven before he shoots the survivor of the Alliance skiff is punctuated by an F-bomb. I could imagine that, along with Mal being a lot less proactive and on his game, he would let an English profanity or two drop instead of Chinese;)

ShinyTrinket...this was definitely a brilliant chapter and I so wanna find out what the Hell Alex was doing appearing out of nowhere and saving the day (though it was a mighty lovely gesture;D)

BEB
Saturday, 16 September 2006 13:09
The only other English curse I can remember Mal using was "son of a bitch" in 'The Train Job' when he found out they'd taken the medicine that was needed in Paradiso. I get the feeling he's the kind of guy that ONLY uses English curses, especially dropping the F-bomb, when he's really at the end of it, thus my usage of it here.

Post Your Comments

You must log in to post comments.