Take turns writing "The Adventures of Jeremy"

POSTED BY: Succatash
UPDATED: Thursday, February 26, 2004 05:29
VIEWED: 15545
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SAINT JAYNE

Saturday, February 14, 2004 8:02 AM

Minutes past. Possibly hours. His mind refused to function, refused to believe what had happened. He couldn't believe what his eyes and ears were telling him. The blasts of light, like camera bulbs, the screams of agony, nothing more than sounds from a TV somewhere.

"That's Jeremy! Terminate at all costs!" came a voice.

Jeremy tilted his head, still stunned. Three blurry figures in dark suits and sunglasses walked up the grassy slope. Streams of wild natives launched themselves at the businessmen, only to be half incinerated in blasts of radiance by weapons each man carried.

Jeremy's senses returned rapidly. His eyes focused and his limbs started to move. He glared at the men he now recognized from Universal's "Fan Management" division. The middle man, his suit blacker than the others, leveled his weapon at Jeremy.

The flash of light was interrupted by a native warrior who hurled himself in the beam's path with a cry of "Gonboli!" His remaining upper torso slammed into Jeremy, knocking him off the edge of the cliff.

TEELABROWN

Saturday, February 14, 2004 2:41 PM

As he is falling off the cliff, the world starts to change around him. Instead of waves crashing on to rocks, he falls into a dumpster in an allyway. He pulls himself out of there, and gets an odd sense of deja vu. Then it hits him. This is the same allyway where he met Teela B and The Master.

He looks at his shoes, and starts to look up while saying: "No good, lousy, son of a-" He sees Teela B standing there.

Teela tells him: "I know he didn't help you. It happens, er, a lot. But I'm going to try to help you. Tell me, what do you need done?"

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2+2 makes 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

SUCCATASH

Saturday, February 14, 2004 3:12 PM

Jeremy was confused by the recent turn of events, but he was grateful for Teela B's help.

Suddenly, Teela B fell down with a sharp cry, holding her head with both hands. She was whimpering.

"What's wrong, Teela B?" asked Jeremy.

"Oh, the pain, it's terrible!" cried Teela B. "Millions of voices just cried out for quality television, and were suddenly silenced."

Jeremy realized what had happened. "NO!" he screamed in protest. He had seen this before. "I think they just cancelled Angel! I don't believe it!"

Teela B. began sobbing. "Now, Joss has nothing. Firefly is our only hope."

TEELABROWN

Saturday, February 14, 2004 3:27 PM

Jeremy's heart almost melts at the site of Teela B. He holds out his hand to help her up, and she takes it. She dries her tears, and gets a determined look on her face.

"Gorram execs! They will pay!"

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2+2 makes 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

SAINT JAYNE

Saturday, February 14, 2004 7:13 PM

The sounds of many feet running grew louder at the mouth of the alley. Jeremy had just about enough of these guys. He stood tall, resolute, motionless, and waiting. Teela B, still on her knees in pain, draped across his side for support.

What came next didn't appear in front of them. It appeared behind them. Blinding light flared down the alley way. Teela B and Jeremy, startled and sightless, were seized roughly and pulled into the light.

When Jeremy opened his eyes again, he was looking up into the angluar face of some sort of medic.

"It's alright, you're safe now", she said soothingly. "As long as you're in this time, you're not a threat to Fox's plans. They own everything now, but they're so busy combatting us in the past, they don't even see that we're regrouping in the present."

"What... time is it?" asked Jeremy groggily.

"Quarter after three", came the reply.

"No, no. What year?"

SUCCATASH

Saturday, February 14, 2004 7:54 PM

"The year is 2125. Try to remain calm."

Jeremy sat up and realized he was talking to a very old woman. "Who are you?" he asked.

"My name is Channain. I was a soldier during the Fox Wars of 2008. By taking special medicine, I have managed to increase my lifespan. I am very very old. I am here to help you. We must provide you with weapons and send you back. But you are not ready, not yet. Come, let's meet the others."

GEEZER

Saturday, February 14, 2004 9:05 PM

Jeremy follows the old but still spry Channain into the next room, and is surprised to be confronted by exact duplicates of himself and Teela Brown.

Channain sees his confusion, and explains. "Ever since the ban on cloning research was overturned during the second Clinton administration..."

"Hillary?" Jeremy interrupts.

"No. George. As I was saying, when the Funkadelic party took control of Congress, a lot of old laws went away. We started then, with DNA recovered from...well, maybe I shouldn't say, to try to clone you and Teela. But we've never been able to duplicate the unique and valuable characteristics that may allow you to defeat the forces of corporate greed."

Teela, now somewhat recovered, walks over to her clone and looks her over closely. "But what are those special qualities? She looks just like me."

"A double-digit I.Q." replies the old woman, as the Teela clone grins foolishly and starts picking her nose.

"Keep the Shiny side up"

SUCCATASH

Saturday, February 14, 2004 11:55 PM

Teela Brown screamed in horror. "A stupid me clone? Noooo! I am smart, this is an insult!"

The Teela-Clone began to cry. Suddenly Teela felt bad, so she hugged her clone. "There, there, Me, it's okay."

Jeremy walked over to his clone. He turned towards Channain and asks, "So what's wrong with my clone? Is he stupid too?"

SUCCATASH

Sunday, February 15, 2004 4:30 AM

"I'll answer that question," said a strange new voice. "But you don't want to hear the answer."

A shy, unimportant servant suddenly appeared, rolling a giant table into the room. The servant left the room quickly.

On the table, a human head floated and bubbled inside a big jar of thick, clear fluid. It looked just like Succatash.

It WAS Succatash.

"Yes, I've been kept alive for over 120 years due to the miracle of modern science." said the head in the bottle. "I'm here to help -- Please don't tap on the glass, it's REALLY loud." Succatash rolled his eyes at Channain.

"Hey young gal, you get prettier every day!" said the Succatash-Head.

Channain blushed, and her wrinkled skin looked kind of weird. "Oh you sure know how to treat a girl, Succatash!" exclaimed the shrivelled old lady.

Channain climbed onto the table and dipped her foot into the jar. The Succatash Head began to nibble on her toe while the old lady giggled.

After several moments, Jeremy cleared his throat and decided it was time to speak his mind and get back to business.

TEELABROWN

Sunday, February 15, 2004 4:35 AM

"I'm sorry, I make everyone cry."

Teela sees Tash's head being rolled in.

"Succatash? Tash, how are you?"

_____________
"Freedom is the Freedom to say that 2+2 makes 4. If that is granted, all else follws"-Winston, 1984
Teela Brown, keeper of bad typing.
"No one reads these things any way."- Bart on Blackboard

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