How Do You handle Death?
POSTED BY: RiveR6213
UPDATED: Sunday, January 18, 2009 19:09
VIEWED: 23778
PAGE 2 of 15
I see death as a transition, from living in one body to living in what some might call "The Force". I believe that the inhabitants of this 'verse are connected to each other(not through any type of acended being, list all acendeds who apply), and when they die they just become part of a larger existance. I don't believe that we go to heaven or hell but I do believe that we move on and become part of something larger than we once were. So, I don't sit around and cry about it when someone/Thing/Animal I know, dies.
Besides, it was their own stupid fault that they're dead in the first place!
JOSSIS(Most Definitely)AGOD
Self appointed Forsaken! Been on the list for a while now!
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A person I know just lost someone and he's just walking around all zombie-like. I wanted to go over there and slap him and tell him to wake up, but I guess he's just going through his process of acceptance, so I better leave him alone. It’s not the end of the world he's still alive and kicking so what's the problem?
Something about the whole death thing angers me. People simply get strange and reflective in their thinking as though death hasn’t like been surrounding us all our lives. Not a day passes when we don't hear about someone dying. Open up a newspaper and we get to read all about it. Everyday this happens. What's the big deal? I guess it’s suddenly more traumatic when we happen to have known the person that died.
Even I got a little misty at one point over someone's death, but I wasn’t in the right state of mind, so from where I stand, it doesn’t really count.
I sort of like the new me. Uncaring, crazy, and devoid of any form of needing humans for anything. It's almost like I'm a machine, but if that’s what it takes to live here on Earth, so be it.
All this business about losing Grandma's and Grandpa's...sounds heavy, but better you than me. I'm glad I didn’t have to go through that. I’m as free as a bird in this day and time. No connections. Get rid of everyone and you won’t have to deal with people’s death. That’s the key.
River
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Feeling some pretty hollow vibes in this thread. I get cut up about death, whether its someone close to me or someone I have absolutely no connection to. If it's someone close to me then of course I get upset - I am NEVER going to see or talk to that person ever again, they are gone and everything they could have done in the world will never happen. Death may be a part of life but it is the worst part. People say there are worse things than death, and while that may seem to be the case at some times its almost always never too late to turn it around.
As for people I have no connection with at all, I do not understand how people can be so lacking in compassion that when they wake up in the morning and read that thousands of innocent people have been killed in an act of war or as a result of a natural disaster that they feel nothing. That they (and I apologise for this River6123) 'dont care about humans', and as a result feel nothing for the deaths of men, women and children who never had the chance to experience a full life. I don't understand how somebody can be that empty, that hollow that they do not care for the lives of fellow human beings, but can grieve for the loss of a television show.
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Feeling some pretty hollow vibes in this thread. I get cut up about death, whether its someone close to me or someone I have absolutely no connection to. If it's someone close to me then of course I get upset - I am NEVER going to see or talk to that person ever again, they are gone and everything they could have done in the world will never happen. Death may be a part of life but it is the worst part. People say there are worse things than death, and while that may seem to be the case at some times its almost always never too late to turn it around.
As for people I have no connection with at all, I do not understand how people can be so lacking in compassion that when they wake up in the morning and read that thousands of innocent people have been killed in an act of war or as a result of a natural disaster that they feel nothing. That they (and I apologise for this River6123) 'dont care about humans', and as a result feel nothing for the deaths of men, women and children who never had the chance to experience a full life. I don't understand how somebody can be that empty, that hollow that they do not care for the lives of fellow human beings, but can grieve for the loss of a television show.
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Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
I will never understand why so many people make such a noise about death. I guess it comes out of the relationships that we form in our lives. The closer you are with people, the harder it is to take when they die on you. My goal is simple. Make no more friends, and death isnt an issue.
I guess i really don't care about humans. The human race can kiss my ass.
Mima's psych 101 on River who offered herself up for comment:
As soon as I read your first post, i knew that you were living in isolation. "only people who distance themselves have that attitude" i thought, "this person doesn't care about anyone." Then you confirmed it with your second post. The denial and anger in your posts makes me think that perhaps you're a)jealous you haven't found a true connection yet b)still pissed at your parents for dying, especially if you felt unloved when they did.
I agree that most humans suck. the endeavor I've chosen is to be strong enough to live life with an open heart. be very very cautious, but still reach out to people. turn from those who betray you, spend time on people who don't. reach out to people in need, and many times simple human decency (rare, i know) will build a connection that lasts. and when you do find a precious friend/lover/family member who wants to know who you are and still respects you and isn't afraid to share themself, it makes all of life and the other crappy humans bearable.
and you can't have that "oh death is no big deal" thing anymore unless you have a really really strong christian faith (which i dont). so if you don't have the "souls will meet again" thing going on, the loss of another person who saw you and valued you and validated your short mostly pointless life crushes some spark of your soul in a way that sends rage and fear into your heart. that's the big thing about death.
we all want people to *see* us, and it's hard to find those people. and when they're taken from us, our whole self image is in danger. community is what you found here river, and the anonymity of the boards is what makes you feel safe to share. it's why i love them too, plus that this particular set of boards is not full of stupid idiots. if the internet went away today- wouldn't you struggle, personally?
so that's my take on your comments- basically you're being a coward. and you're missing out. safety is lonely. that's why when you said "i am so complete" i laughed out loud. you are laying your {bleeding} proverbial heart out for strangers because you are not complete. you seek community.
we all do. we can't help it. i've really enjoyed reading your posts on other threads. thanks for being here. i see you river. now if you see people in pain and you think "fools, you're so weak. death is certain so you're such dope"- you are mistaken in your judgement. instead you should be thinking "wow there's someone who's not afraid of pain because they dared to love. wonder what that's like?"
and as for your secondary rant, i don't agree with it all. send it directly to the people who insulted you and don't try to paint the boards sexist. i've been here for years and have never not once had a person who flamed at me by throwing my gender into the flame.
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Nice double post.
I care more about Firefly than I do about human life. Just because a person doesn’t grieve like you do doesn’t make them a monster, or hollow as you put it. I've had enough people in my life die on me to the point where death is not an issue. It really doesn’t matter. Death is something that happens. It's an unavoidable fact of life, so why sweat it?
It’s amazing that one has to be tossed into the 'hollow' category just for not feeling the way you do. Hello! This is earth where there are millions of people and each one of those people demonstrates a different personality. I'm sure that there are millions of people on this planet who no longer have feelings about death and don't react to it the way you do.
And death itself is a pretty nasty subject...people react to it in different ways. Some are heroic about it, some are afraid of it, and some just don't give a frak about it and find other people's reaction to it annoying.
Have you ever been around someone who just lost a loved one? All the screaming and crying that they do seriously throws a wet towel into what could have been a good day. And then they walk around like zombies all deep within thought about life, the universe, and everything. If this is a good thing I want to have nothing to do with it. If this is the price of being close to humans...you can leave me out of it.
River
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Quote:
Originally posted by mima:Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
I will never understand why so many people make such a noise about death. I guess it comes out of the relationships that we form in our lives. The closer you are with people, the harder it is to take when they die on you. My goal is simple. Make no more friends, and death isnt an issue.
I guess i really don't care about humans. The human race can kiss my ass.
Mima's psych 101 on River who offered herself up for comment:
As soon as I read your first post, i knew that you were living in isolation. "only people who distance themselves have that attitude" i thought, "this person doesn't care about anyone." Then you confirmed it with your second post. The denial and anger in your posts makes me think that perhaps you're a)jealous you haven't found a true connection yet b)still pissed at your parents for dying, especially if you felt unloved when they did.
I agree that most humans suck. the endeavor I've chosen is to be strong enough to live life with an open heart. be very very cautious, but still reach out to people. turn from those who betray you, spend time on people who don't. reach out to people in need, and many times simple human decency (rare, i know) will build a connection that lasts. and when you do find a precious friend/lover/family member who wants to know who you are and still respects you and isn't afraid to share themself, it makes all of life and the other crappy humans bearable.
and you can't have that "oh death is no big deal" thing anymore unless you have a really really strong christian faith (which i dont). so if you don't have the "souls will meet again" thing going on, the loss of another person who saw you and valued you and validated your short mostly pointless life crushes some spark of your soul in a way that sends rage and fear into your heart. that's the big thing about death.
we all want people to *see* us, and it's hard to find those people. and when they're taken from us, our whole self image is in danger. community is what you found here river, and the anonymity of the boards is what makes you feel safe to share. it's why i love them too, plus that this particular set of boards is not full of stupid idiots. if the internet went away today- wouldn't you struggle, personally?
so that's my take on your comments- basically you're being a coward. and you're missing out. safety is lonely. that's why when you said "i am so complete" i laughed out loud. you are laying your {bleeding} proverbial heart out for strangers because you are not complete. you seek community.
now if you see people in pain and you think "fools, you're so weak. death is certain so you're such dope"- you are mistaken in your judgement. instead you should be thinking "wow there's someone who's not afraid of pain because they dared to love. wonder what that's like?"
and as for your secondary rant, i don't agree with it all. send it directly to the people who insulted you and don't try to paint the boards sexist. i've been here for years and have never not once had a person who flamed at me by throwing my gender into the flame.
Hey, This thread's not about me. This thread is about death and how we go about reacting to it. Not my fault I don't care too much about death...crap happens.
Also, I harbor no ill feelings towards my parents, matter of fact I was glad to see them go and good riddance if you ask me. Anyhow, none of what you said applies to me in any way, but it is interesting stuff, so thanks for the free psych 101, but I'm doing just fine thank you very much.
River
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Lost my father last year to cancer of the lungs. We had a large funeral, a great gathering to see him off. I have to say that I've never given death much thought until the old man died. We all die some day, and if this is so, my last days will be blessed with the faces of the ones I love some much seeing me off.
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My family skews toward the very old, so death has been a presence (or lack thereof) in my life for as long as I can recall. Mortality is just a part of things.
(I felt strange at my dad's funeral, looking around at everyone crying, and not shedding any tears of my own.)
I've kinda come to look on it as a blessing though; the men of my family don't age well. Senility, Alzheimer's, cancer. . .
(Dad was suffering, toward the end. Maybe not in pain, but his mind just. . . wasn't working right. He was forgetting people. He's not anymore, though. He's fine now, and I'll see him again, eventually.)
My mind is the only part of me that I've ever been proud of. The thought of losing my faculties is more terrifying than death and whatever might follow it. Like Bryan Adams said; hope to die before I get old.
Not suicide though; that's a coward's way. 'Sides, I wanna see how this story ends. I intend to burn out, bright and hot. I want people to remember me.
-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.
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Quote:
Originally posted by Cybersnark:
My family skews toward the very old, so death has been a presence (or lack thereof) in my life for as long as I can recall. Mortality is just a part of things.
(I felt strange at my dad's funeral, looking around at everyone crying, and not shedding any tears of my own.)
I've kinda come to look on it as a blessing though; the men of my family don't age well. Senility, Alzheimer's, cancer. . .
(Dad was suffering, toward the end. Maybe not in pain, but his mind just. . . wasn't working right. He was forgetting people. He's not anymore, though. He's fine now, and I'll see him again, eventually.)
My mind is the only part of me that I've ever been proud of. The thought of losing my faculties is more terrifying than death and whatever might follow it. Like Bryan Adams said; hope to die before I get old.
Not suicide though; that's a coward's way. 'Sides, I wanna see how this story ends. I intend to burn out, bright and hot. I want people to remember me.
Nice post.
I also am not too crazy about the idea of losing control of my faculties, but that's what we have to look forward too when we get really old. I for one hope I get hit by a truck before I get too old so I wont have to experince being an old lady.
And suicide? been there done that and I botched it, so I guess I have to wait this life thing out, but I don't even see it as being a cowardly thing to do...sometimes you have to hit the suicide switch. Different strokes for different folks.
When I die, I don't want to be remembered at all, but I won't have to worry about that. I've fixed my life up so well that God himself cannot enter, so I got that covered.
River
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