Real World Event Discussions

Trouble

POSTED BY: Wulfenstar
UPDATED: Monday, April 9, 2012 04:37
VIEWED: 5526
PAGE 5 of 7

BYTEMITE

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 7:14 PM

Heh, eleven or so years from now, we could have a new adorable browncoat who might say hi on the general board.

Until then, I hope you'll keep us updated. She sounds like she's gonna be the cutest little Wulf. I think you're going to be a proud dad.

WULFENSTAR

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 8:03 PM

I would like that.

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies"

WULFENSTAR

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 9:59 PM

P.S. For the thimble-minded...

Heres a good rule to live by.

You GIVE respect, you GET respect.

I have respect for Bytes opinions, as he had respect for mine.

Cue the outrage.

"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies"

STORYMARK

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 10:28 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Wulfenstar:

You GIVE respect, you GET respect.

Has it even occurred to you that it works both ways?

Spoon!

BYTEMITE

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 10:29 PM

I don't always agree with you on everything, and my life was no where near as bad as what you went through, but I do understand the way you're thinking. I got into lots of fights when I was a kid, back then it was about carving out a place for myself, protecting friends, and this honour code I had. I was an intense kid, but back then I wasn't actually self-destructive, that all came from other issues.

So I don't think any of this is necessarily destructive either. It's just a different way of approaching the world. I don't think you're going to ruin your daughter, and I also think a lot of what you have to teach her will be tempered by your Latina/Asian wife.

Just make sure that if she fights that it's her choice, you know? Fighting itself isn't bad, but a person has to volunteer for it, they have to understand the stakes and why they're fighting. A parent will want to protect their kid, I think even you'll be a little protective Wulf (I'm imagining her first boyfriend and the traditional if you hurt her speech, hah, poor guy) and there's nothing wrong with that either. But sometimes kids will just want to fight, because something's wrong and it's obvious it's wrong, and sometimes a parent can't protect them from that. My parents were normal and they couldn't protect me from my fighting ways. And at the same time, you can teach a person to fight but you can't make them fight. That's just how it is sometimes.

KWICKO

Tuesday, April 3, 2012 11:36 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Wulfenstar:
P.S. For the thimble-minded...

Heres a good rule to live by.

You GIVE respect, you GET respect.

And this is why you get no respect around here. You give none, you EARN none.

HKCAVALIER

Wednesday, April 4, 2012 12:52 AM

Yeah, this is the self-defeating nature of "respect is EARNED." That means we all start at disrespect, disrespect is the default. Somehow, folks whom we are disrespecting are supposed to earn our respect. By what? Disrespecting us back? But as we see, it doesn't work that way. Disrespect begets disrespect every damn time.

And then you have the case of Anthony here, who routinely returns respect for disrespect and gets nothing but more disrespect for his trouble. So, this rule to live by, "You GIVE respect, you GET respect" is at least intellectually dishonest. It basically means, "I will respect you if I damn well feel like it and, really, I probably won't."

HKCavalier

Hey, hey, hey, don't be mean. We don't have to be mean, because, remember, no matter where you go, there you are.

ANTHONYT

Wednesday, April 4, 2012 1:02 AM

Hello,

I appreciate the notion, but to be fair, the respect I use in my language does erode over time... sometimes wearing to a sharp edge. There are a few here who have worn me past much semblance of civility.

The gist of your premise is quite correct, however. The opening position when approaching other people should properly be respect. If the opening position is disrespect, and respect must be earned, then there is little chance for a genesis of respect.

Wulf has the habit of casually insulting his audience and then wondering why they are negative in their responses.

I sometimes think he does not even realize when he does it. It would explain much.

It's hard to believe he does it knowingly and then is surprised at the reaction.

--Anthony

_______________________________________________

Note to self: Mr. Raptor believes that women who want to control their reproductive processes are sluts.

Reference thread: http://fireflyfans.net/mthread.asp?b=18&t=51196

Never forget what this man is. You keep forgiving him his trespasses and speak to him as though he is a reasonable human being. You keep forgetting the things he's advocated. If you respond to this man again, you are being foolish.

NIKI2

Wednesday, April 4, 2012 4:02 AM

Ditto Anthony. And others. I grinned reading Wulf's post, remembering the past few years. I, too, would LIKE to believe he does it out of lack of self-knowledge. I long since ceased trying to figure out if it is.

Anthony, people here would wear the patience of a SAINT to a finely-honed edge. You do better than 99% of us, which should be enough to rest on your laurels. That IS fair, so take the compliment like a man! ;o)

BYTEMITE

Wednesday, April 4, 2012 2:42 PM

Actually Wulf, I should apologize. I added the one paragraph to my last post because there was one time you said that you'd like to be like the father figure in that movie Kickass.

But actually I think you just want to teach her how to fight, not put her in any situation like what you HAD to fight against when you were a kid. Which is a big difference.

So that last piece of advice was in retrospect unnecessary, and might even have accidentally been a little offensive to you.

Anyway, I think you'll do fine. Kids are pretty resilient and they often have a mind of their own.