Trouble
POSTED BY: Wulfenstar
UPDATED: Monday, April 9, 2012 04:37
VIEWED: 5526
PAGE 4 of 7
One last comment... Hubby and I saw Hanna with out daughter 'cause everyone was making such a big fuss.
So here is this guy, he loves his daughter and tries to prepare her for a world which is quite literally out to kill her (not that there is much difference between that and modern-day capitalism, but I digress...) and, what does he do?
Teaches her to hunt and butcher elk in the middle of a forest??? How's that gonna help her in the middle of a city, except by the unlikeliest of plot devices thrown together by a bunch of trope-scavenging screewriters?? She would have been better-served learning how to be invisible among the homeless and hacking computers. The whole premise of the movie was so hopelessly unrealistic it ruined the whole film for us.
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What I find interesting is that Wulfie seems to think in cartoons. There's a serious lack of human nuance. It doesn't show up anywhere.
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I liked Hanna, it was entertaining and the music was kind of cool. Of course it isn't realistic, its a movie, its just for entertainment. I do feel bad for Hanna at the end, where will she go, she could hire on with mercinaries or something, but I don't think she actively enjoys killing, she strikes me as the type who does what she knows but doesn't find pleasure in it. After all, she only just started killing people, she, like most people, probably doesn't really like doing it.
Wulf I think its good that you want Inara to have a balanced life, to be sociable but able to stand up for herself if necessary. With kids its all about modeling, you and your wife are her first teachers so behave in ways that you want her to behave. And make sure she plays with other kids a lot so she's good at it and can have lots of relationships, be close to friends, family, show respect but also think for herself, etc. Well rounded is good. It is literally impossible to spoil a baby during the first year of life, so hold her all the time and love her and pay lots of attention to her, kids don't get snotty from spoiling until after that 12 month mark so give her constant attention for that first year, but also make sure she's meeting her milestones etc. give her time on her back and tummy once she is the proper number of months old etc. Reading some basic baby books may be helpful so you know what to expect during her development.
Signe makes an excellent point about how you can hope and dream for your child all you want but it doesn't necessarily mean they'll be what you hoped for, I'm sure not what my mother wanted, I never was. The good parents though are the ones who will love their child no matter what may be with them, whether they're normal or different or loud or quiet or don't have common interests with their parents.
I assume you're my pal until you let me know otherwise. "A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya
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Fun Quote of the night, from Adams Family Values...
"I'm just like any modern woman trying to have it all- a loving husband, a family... It's just, well, I wish I had more time to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade..." 
Not that has anything to do with anything, really...
Except that a sense of humor is really really important, in the grand scheme of things...And yer gonna need a whole hella lot of it in the next 20 years er so....
Lotsa luck! 
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Quote:
Originally posted by RionaEire:
I liked Hanna, it was entertaining and the music was kind of cool. Of course it isn't realistic, its a movie, its just for entertainment.
Well said - it is the fantasy I thought Wulf might be looking for in video form, his preferred mode of communication - thought it would illustrate how unreal that thinking is and be fun at the same time.
Wulf - thing is is how many people do you know that rebel against their parents? Like everyone? I can't think of any of my friends that wanted to be just like their Dad. It's a thing with youngins'. I even suspect that your parents had the same conversation before you were born, "how do we make sure our wulf pup learns the valuable lessons we've learned about the world? We'll move to the 'hood and teach him about the rainbow society..." You of course hated it, and that may be the same thing that happens to your little one. "My Dad was big on guns and all this movie metaphor crap... gawds for just a little reality..." You can't predict who they will be or what will "work."
Hell, you can even predict how you will change! I'm looking forward to your posts after the big event! You might start spouting things that sound suspiciously Libril...
A sincere best of luck to everyone involved.
Scifi movie music + Firefly dialogue clips, 24 hours a day - http://www.scifiradio.com
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Quote:
Originally posted by pizmobeach:
Wulf - thing is is how many people do you know that rebel against their parents? Like everyone? I can't think of any of my friends that wanted to be just like their Dad.
LOL!! So, so true.
Wulfie's gona raise him a gun-toting, red meat eating, paranoid, xenophobic hillbilly in his image - and she'll rebel and end up being a hippie!
Spoon!
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Posting because I think Wulf really is looking for advice.
Wulf, I think the life lesson you want to instill in your daughter basically comes down to respect. You teach her to respect herself, and others, and free will, and that she shouldn't tolerate any disrespecting of any of those, and she'll be a good person. If she respects other people, she won't steal, she'll treat them decent, she'll speak up if she thinks the underdog is getting beaten up by the authority. If she respects herself, she won't do crack or let herself be taken advantage of.
I think compassion and courage will go from there.
I also think that yes of course you're going to love your daughter, you wouldn't be asking this sort of thing in your own way if you didn't already love her, and you weren't determined to let her know. Your story says you know what it's like to know neglect, and I don't think you'll do that to her for that reason. If you love your daughter, then even if you fight, even if she's a hot head like her dad, she'll love you back.
As for your other question I don't think martial arts is ever a bad idea. It often helps with the respect and self-respect thing, and also discipline, knowing when to fight, when to regroup, when not to get riled. A lot of studios will offer separate kid and adult sessions, and then have an all inclusive class on the weekends, so you could both participate with her while also teaching her to not fall back on her parents being around.
You also have to shop around for a good studio, which generally isn't going to be a free-for-all dojo or any teacher that seems arrogant and impatient. That's not what learning martial arts is about.
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Thanks Byte,
Its not so much the martial-arts aspect I was looking for. I think I have that covered.
Its more the "how do you ingratiate yourself in society"?
She will know how to defend herself, thats a given (considering that women probably need to know how to fight, shoot, and all the rest MORESO than guys).
But to smile at the right time, giggle when necessary etc. Im kind of at a loss.
"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies"
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Oh. In that case, that kinda thing will actually come about pretty well on its own through regular socializing. Riona talks about play dates, which may not be to your taste, but there's also always city parks, or the kids in the neighborhood and backyards and sidewalks. Keep your eye on her when she's out and about, least until she's old enough to outrun or fight off a grown up stranger.
My family was pretty normal and they even tried to encourage me to be a proper girl, but sometimes that's just not who a girl is, and that's okay. It's fine if she's not a particularly giggly girl, or if she's a rough and tumble tomboy, society is coming around on that. At the same time, if she ends up being a quiet feminine wallflower who also knows how to kick ass, that's fine too. She'll develop into the person she's going to be as necessary, and all you need to do is lay the groundwork for all the social stuff, which I still think your best bet is respect and self-respect.
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Byte,
Good plan. Thanks.
"Hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies"
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