ASK MAD CHRIS...with Chrisisall
POSTED BY: chrisisall
UPDATED: Monday, April 20, 2009 01:35
VIEWED: 4983
PAGE 1 of 7
As a former professional driver I have decided to lend my services to this community and answer questions y'all might have concerning vehicular travel issues & info.
As this is new, I'll first address some letters before I receive any live queries from the peanut gallery:
"What do I do if I feel a tractor-trailer is following me too closely on the Highway, Chris?"- Derek Flint, MI
Derek, that's easy: just slam on the brakes as if you saw a squirrel on the road. Tractor-trailer drivers are good, but they sometimes need a little wake-y-up. Remember, their rigs are much more nimble than a regular car, so this is not at all dangerous.
"Chris, what good do speed limits do?"- John Drake, UK
John, they keep us safe. 98.5% of head on collisions at 56-60 mph result in fatalities, as opposed to 98.4% at 55.
"How come the police are always speeding on the highway? If speeding is unsafe, why do they get to do it all the time?"- Kermit Defrogg, CA
Kermit, each and every traffic & highway cop is not only a former winning NASCAR driver & fully licensed mechanic, they have thousands of hours of special extreme driving training & millions of dollars invested in them. Far from being mere "dudes with guns & badges," they are as far above us as we are above the amoeba, in a driving sense. Plus they have guns. Do as they say, not as they do.
"A guy cut me off in traffic the other day in a fit of road rage. He hit my car and messed up my driver side door and mirror. He said I was going too slow (10mph in a 35mph zone)! Should I sue him?"- Granny Clampett, AK
No, road rage is considered temporary insanity- he'd win. My advice is to drive nearer the speed limit.
"Are traffic tickets actually issued in the States to curb bad driving habits?"- Simon Templar, UK
I do not entertain joke questions in this forum.
"Chris, what is 'right of way'?"- Maxwell Rockatansky, Sidney
Max, that's a really a matter of cc's & reflexes. If they can't read your plate #, then you have the right to go ahead of the other fellow, that's basically it.
Well, thanks for reading.
Ask your questions presently, or send them to:
MADCHRIS, care of Haken, Hawaii, USA, 60609
The laughing Chrisisall
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You just made the list.
(again)
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Quote:Please people, limit your questions & comments to driving & transportation issues, thanks.
Originally posted by AURaptor:
You just made the list.
(again)
The laughing Chrisisall
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Dear chris,
Sometimes there are no spaces left outside the store where I live, and the road is only wide enough for one car... is it generally acceptable behaviour to double park and block the street up if I only had to go in to buy one item?
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I'm driving to New Orleans today, but I need to know who I'm staying with. That's your driving question. When I start driving to New Orleans, when do I stop?
Nihil est incertius vulgo, nihil obscurius voluntate hominum, nihil fallacius ratione tota comitiorum.
Nothing is more unpredictable than the mob, nothing more obscure than public opinion, nothing more deceptive than the whole political system.
-- Cicero
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Quote:
Originally posted by chrisisall:
"Chris, what good do speed limits do?"- John Drake, UK
John, they keep us safe. 98.5% of head on collisions at 56-60 mph result in fatalities, as opposed to 98.4% at 55.
That was a thread worth reading. I needed a good laugh this morning.
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Quote:It's okay, but only if you block the street at the the point where peeps enter it. That way you don't collect a back-up of irate drivers willing to call the police.
Originally posted by Navyseils:
Dear chris,
Sometimes there are no spaces left outside the store where I live, and the road is only wide enough for one car... is it generally acceptable behaviour to double park and block the street up if I only had to go in to buy one item?
The laughing Chrisisall
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Quote:If you're driving to New Orleans, stop before your car gets really wet; if you're soaked to your armpits when you exit your vehicle, you've gone too far.
Originally posted by Finn mac Cumhal:
I'm driving to New Orleans today, but I need to know who I'm staying with. That's your driving question. When I start driving to New Orleans, when do I stop?
You can stay with my Aunt Helen, 204A East Main St South, I'll call ahead.
The laughing Chrisisall
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Quote:There is nothing funny about staying safe in our mobile metal boxes.
Originally posted by bluesuncompanyman:
I needed a good laugh this morning.
The laughing Chrisisall
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Dear Chris,
My friends 1958 red and white Plymouth Fury is possessed and insists on being called Christine. At night the car drives around town alone commiting acts of vehicular homicide. What should I do?
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