How Do You handle Death?

POSTED BY: RiveR6213
UPDATED: Sunday, January 18, 2009 19:09
VIEWED: 23778
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RIVER6213

Sunday, June 25, 2006 1:08 PM

NO. There will never be that one day that I am happy. I can accept this. I don't like it but that day will never happen.

I figured it out the other day. My mistake in life was assuming that I was here to be happy. I'm not here to be happy or comfortable. I here to learn humility, and its clear to all involved that, that's not going over too well. I'm here to suffer to put it plainly.

If I say to you that I am happy, then I must be drugged or on my way to jump off a bridge.

All of my friends commiting suicide over the years, well, they had their reasons. We were a good group. Too bad it ended badly for most of us. I am the last survivor of my group. I was the strongest. I knew that life was hell and they didnt.

River

AGATSU

Sunday, June 25, 2006 1:23 PM

So, were you drugged or on your way to jumping off a bridge when you told us a few weeks ago about how fun that date was? Didn't that give you hope that there might be a few diamonds hidden in this big pile of shit? You just have to keep looking for those instead of saying "It's all just shit, anyways", because the latter is most likely gonna turn out to be a self-fullfilling prophecy.

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22CLAWS

Sunday, June 25, 2006 3:33 PM

Check out Death: The High Cost of Living by Neil Gaiman.

"Two cents. That's what a life is worth."
22

CHRISTHECYNIC

Sunday, June 25, 2006 3:37 PM

River I'm confused.

You say that they are the lucky ones and you admire the ones who pull it off, which they obviously did.

Then you say they're weaker than you. (Unless there is some other definition of "strongest" I'm unaware of.)

How to those two things go together, they had the will and ability to get themselves into a position you consider better. It doesn't strike me as weak.

So here's where I'm confused, do you consider suicide a sign of weakenss or not? If you do why do you admire the weak?

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--
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The other thing I want to say is more on topic.

It's about how people look at suicide, and that's part of dealing with death.

You said:
"I really don't see it as selfishness either.

... It was right for themselves. I doubt that any person wanting to kill themselves is saying "fuck you" to all the people out there. I don't think that they are thinking that when the moment comes. I BET you they are thinking about how they themselves have failed themselves. How they failed in being able to cope with the madness of this life. How they are ashamed that they could not adapt."

And the second paragraph you wrote is exactly why people consider it selfish. The people are doing what is right for themselves, thinking about themselves, and not about others. They aren't thinking about the fact that, whether intended or not, they are saying, "I'm more important than everyone else and I don't care about how much pain I'm going to cause everyone I know because I want to do this and don't give a damn about all of you," which does, kind of, translate to, "Fuck you."

The reason that I bring this up is that the reasons you say it is not selfish are the same reasons others say it is. I think that the reason people deal with death in so many diferent ways is that even when start with exactly the same ideas about it the reach very different conclusions.

Suicide is not the only thing like this. What people may look at as a good death others may look at as horrible. What seems to some as peaceful long life seems like uselessly wasting away to others. How one deals with death all rests upon how one looks at it.

CYBERSNARK

Sunday, June 25, 2006 3:42 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
My mistake in life was assuming that I was here to be happy. I'm not here to be happy or comfortable.

Of course not, no-one is. You're here to make others happy and comfortable.

Everyone of us is broken, and there's not a one who can fix themselves. But you can help fix others, and just maybe, in the process, you'll find someone who can fix you.

(I learned that from InuYasha.

)

-----
We applied the cortical electrodes but were unable to get a neural reaction from either patient.

DUKKATI

Sunday, June 25, 2006 5:26 PM

Death is a new beginning.

One way or the other.

What you choose before death is what you will have after death.

Its all very simple. Just dont make it harder than it really is.

Confusion is the root of fear.

RIVER6213

Sunday, June 25, 2006 8:56 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Agatsu:
So, were you drugged or on your way to jumping off a bridge when you told us a few weeks ago about how fun that date was? Didn't that give you hope that there might be a few diamonds hidden in this big pile of shit?

Actually yes, I was drugged when I went out on that date. I was taking perscription medication that made me feel very unGlenda like. I was feeling unusally giddy; I was not myself that day. Well I'm off that crap, and I'm now back to my old, dark self. And to make it worse I have to check in everyday with a therapist in person or by phone...that's a court order, so I have to make nice everyday to convince certain people not to take away my rights.

Anyway. I must admit that going out was pleasent enough, but it wasnt for me, it was for another person. Also, I spent my life looking for the good out there and you know what? There isnt any.

I handle death with apathy. I doubt that I will ever feel for anyone's loss ever again. On one hand this is a good thing, on another hand its really sad that all my humanity is gone....that point is not lost on me.

I feel really sorry for the people who do break down over the death of others.

I just woke up and need some coffee. I had the strangest dream about being chased by a musical...

River

RIVER6213

Sunday, June 25, 2006 9:05 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by christhecynic:
River I'm confused.

You say that they are the lucky ones and you admire the ones who pull it off, which they obviously did.

Then you say they're weaker than you. (Unless there is some other definition of "strongest" I'm unaware of.)

How to those two things go together, they had the will and ability to get themselves into a position you consider better. It doesn't strike me as weak.

So here's where I'm confused, do you consider suicide a sign of weakenss or not? If you do why do you admire the weak?

-
--
-

The other thing I want to say is more on topic.

It's about how people look at suicide, and that's part of dealing with death.

You said:
"I really don't see it as selfishness either.

... It was right for themselves. I doubt that any person wanting to kill themselves is saying "fuck you" to all the people out there. I don't think that they are thinking that when the moment comes. I BET you they are thinking about how they themselves have failed themselves. How they failed in being able to cope with the madness of this life. How they are ashamed that they could not adapt."

And the second paragraph you wrote is exactly why people consider it selfish. The people are doing what is right for themselves, thinking about themselves, and not about others. They aren't thinking about the fact that, whether intended or not, they are saying, "I'm more important than everyone else and I don't care about how much pain I'm going to cause everyone I know because I want to do this and don't give a damn about all of you," which does, kind of, translate to, "Fuck you."

The reason that I bring this up is that the reasons you say it is not selfish are the same reasons others say it is. I think that the reason people deal with death in so many diferent ways is that even when start with exactly the same ideas about it the reach very different conclusions.

Suicide is not the only thing like this. What people may look at as a good death others may look at as horrible. What seems to some as peaceful long life seems like uselessly wasting away to others. How one deals with death all rests upon how one looks at it.

What can I say Mr. Christhecynic? How one handles death depends on what side of the plaza they are viewing it from.

I'm still trying to wake up and this coffee isnt cutting it. I need some expresso so I can think about my next number in the Musical.

River

RIVER6213

Sunday, June 25, 2006 9:37 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Cybersnark:
Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:
My mistake in life was assuming that I was here to be happy. I'm not here to be happy or comfortable.
Of course not, no-one is. You're here to make others happy and comfortable.

Everyone of us is broken, and there's not a one who can fix themselves. But you can help fix others, and just maybe, in the process, you'll find someone who can fix you.

(I learned that from InuYasha. )

Some people are unfixable and I'm one of them. A broken toy I am...that big disappointment a child experiences when they open up a Christmas present to find that their new toy that they dreamt about is broken.

My days of trying to fix other people are over. I don't have that sort of power anymore. How is it possible to help others when you can't help yourself?

Its amazing how many ways people look at and deal with death.

River

RIVER6213

Sunday, June 25, 2006 9:54 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by Agatsu:
Quote:
Originally posted by RiveR6213:

Bruce let himeself die
Tom Let Himself Die
Karma let herself die
Sandra let herself die
Susan let herself die
Rick let himself die
Jason let himself die
Mark let himself die
Mario let himself die
Jessica let herself die because she was stupid and I MEAN stupid

These are all the friends that I have lost through suicide. All of them, and they are the lucky ones except for Jessica. She was too weird to even be alive and the fact that she made it so far was just plain weird. The reason I go on is because I carry all of their stuff with me.

River

That's a lot of people, what the hell is going on over there?

I think Seattle has the highest suicide rate in the nation. Must be the 5,000 shades of gray that does it and the fact that it rains a lot here.

River

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