Top Ten Things I Learned From Watching Serenity (SPOILERS)
POSTED BY: manwithpez
UPDATED: Monday, November 21, 2005 18:55
VIEWED: 26649
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One of the better threads around here (ask anyone!) is the Top Ten Things I Learned From Watching Firefly thread. While I wish I could take credit for it, I can't, but, I was a contributor! I can take credit for the (mostly hijacked) Top Ten Things I Learned From Watching The Serenity Trailer thread...however, this thread, unlike that one will NOT be written exclusively in spoiler post, so, if you haven't seen the movie, you might want to stop reading now. So, here goes...The Top Ten Things I Learned From Watching Serenity!
1. I don't know what Gifted and Talented classes are teaching in the future, but, I'll be damned if I'll let my little girl go to that class just so her skull can used as a pincushion!
2. The name of the maneuver is "Barnswallow" ...Not "Bugswallow"!
3. Hey! Crazy River! You can say that they never lie down all you want...But, that was one dead ass Reaver, and he wasn't gettin' up anytime soon.
4. Fanty might be prettier than Mingo. And, they might spend hours discussing why anyone would serve on the crew of Serenity, but, it is only by Jayne's muscular butt that they'll be gettin' 40% (Not good odds)!
5. Simon! What got into you man? Has a year without sex onboard Serenity finally made them drop? I understand you're mad about River being in danger, but...you just don't slug Mal unless Nee-YOW wuh-KAI CHANG! (That's 'You want a bullet right in your throat' *from the script)
6. Mal can't know that Kaylee ain't had nothin' twixt her nethers in a year that weren't run on batteries...Jayne, however, could stand to hear a little more.
7. Fruity Oaty Bars will make a 90 pound girl go berserk and kick an entire bar's ass all on her own...But, not before she drops a big clue!
8. Nothing here is what it seems. When a space hooker tells you that isn't incense...Duck!
9. You know what the definition of a hero is? That's what I thought....bitch.
10. Love. It can do a lot of things. It can sell a monster amount of Firfly DVDs. It can make Joss fight for a movie deal. It can make Serenity fly again. You can learn all the math in the 'verse, but you take a boat in the air that you don't love, she'll shake you sure as the turning of worlds.
Come on...you all know I'll be back with more...
Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."
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Don't know where you're getting "bugswallow" from; I heard Wash say "barnswallow" distinctly.
Mary
Always a beast, never a burden. 
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right after the "barnswallow" river said "I swallowed a bug"
ammusing list....
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Ten More Things I Learned From Watching Serenity
1. Do you really think that a mysterious Shepherd has to tell you how he knows so much about the inner workings of the Alliance? Cause, you're about to be in for a surprise...
2. "I'm a leaf on the wind...Watch how I soar." How could you not? We've seen plenty of fancy flying from Wash, but, My LORD!
3. G-32 Paxilate Hydroclorate? Is that anything like fluoride? Cause, I don't want to be a Reaver!
4. If you ever need to find River, and she's not in the same place you left her...look UP!
5. According to the Alliance...Reavers don't exist. Tell that to everyone in that damn town!
6. Don't ride in anything with a Capissen 38 Engine...You know what they do, don't you?
7. If things have really gone as bad as Mal claims they have since the end of Firefly...how did they afford the fancy new Mule?
8. When Captain Tightpants tells you to help turn Serenity into a Reaver ship...you're probably better off helping than saying anything about it.
9. If you finally get it on with the mechanic that's pined for you since day one...make sure your creepy, psychic sister isn't watching from above.
10. Sometimes, even a dead friend can find a way to help you keep The Signal going...even if he did get weirdly stabbed with a sword.
More to follow...You can't stop the signal...you can't ever...
Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."
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1. It's just easier to let Jayne bring his grenades.
2. Love is more powerful than madness.
3. There is nothing 'sly' about sharing a bottle of Blue Sun.
4. You may be in your bunk, but your conversation is not secret.
5. You want a gift for the Captain that has everything? Try a pony or a plastic rocket.
6. A world without sin is a world without humans.
7. Don't argue with the crazy girl. She's either going to make *that* face, grab your balls, or take you down hard.
8. It's okay to leave them to die.
9. 'Whore' may be another way to say 'I love you', but 'I don't know if I want to leave' is tantamount to admitting that love is returned.
10. Joss has an unhealthy fixation about sex with Robots.
*~*~*
"Your toes are in the sand."
"And your head's up your..."
"Hey!"
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Quote:
Originally posted by manwithpez:
3. Hey! Crazy River! You can say that they never lie down all you want...But, that was one dead ass Reaver, and he wasn't gettin' up anytime soon.
Actually, this isn't crazy speak at all. The Reavers were made by the PAX, the substance that made everyone else on Miranda 'lie down' and let themselves die. 10% of the population didn't 'lie down', in fact, they 'never lie down'.
She wasn't referring to the dead body in front of her, but the multitude of Reavers whose agggressive responses were increased and not decreased by the PAX.
That's how I saw it, anyway.
*~*~*
"Your toes are in the sand."
"And your head's up your..."
"Hey!"
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I learned that it's alot of fun with fellow FFF.net'ers. . .and would have been more fun with those who were missing. . .
BUT. . .
It's good to know that some folks were able to make a 'marriage-positive' decision regarding a trip to Raleigh.
*smile*
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Quote:
Originally posted by Jacqui:
6. A world without sin is a world without humans.
I'm all for the funny, and these lists are great, but I'd like to take a moment to contemplate this.
Perfectly stated.
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Top Ten Things I Learned From Watching Serenity:
1. Memorize the "safe word" before you meet River.
2. If Mal and Inara don't fight, it's a trap.
3. Spending an hour with Mal can make anyone angry.
4. That Kaylee should always keeps an extra supply of batteries on hand.
5. And keep an extra supply of cry babies too.
6. The definition of interesting.
7. Never ride in a Capissen 38.
8. When you can't do something smart, at least do something right.
9. Get your education out on the rim and not in Alliance schools.
10. Always let Jayne bring gernades.
NY/NJ Browncoats: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/firefly_nyc
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No, I got that about River...I was just makin' a joke.
I do that...
From time to time...
Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."
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