CAPTION TIGHTPANTS! #31

POSTED BY: TenthCrewMember
UPDATED: Monday, June 27, 2005 23:07
VIEWED: 10973
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KMS

Thursday, June 23, 2005 7:28 PM

Quote:

Here we see Officer Jayne Cobb, of the Independent Fashion Police, inspect the wardrobe of one Simon Tam --- suspected of having worn white after Labor Day.

KMS
We’re not obsessed, we’re focused.---Gizzie

CHOLLETT

Thursday, June 23, 2005 7:59 PM

Jayne joins the cast of CSI for their newest season.

or

Adam Baldwin decides to bring his new work from The Inside onto Serenity. Simon isn't pleased.

or

The newest Reality TV phenomenon: Learning to sew with Jayne Cobb

or

(cheesy british narrator): Now join us as we delve deeply into The Fabulous Life: The Crew of Serenity.

or

Jayne joins the cast of fashion experts on "What Not To Wear".

and now, for some non-reality TV captions. Sorry 'bout all that.

Jayne: "......and i think that the blood can be washed out with some coke or bleach.......wait......is that CHOCOLATE?!?!? Awwww, that NEVER comes out!"

"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie

KMS

Thursday, June 23, 2005 8:04 PM

Jayne inspects his costume for the boy band he's joining on Canton -- Mudder's Boy! -- featuring their hit,
The Hero of Canton don't wear no gorram slinky skirt,
He's a man's man! Just look at that shirt!
Ought to be the mayor! With knife slashes,
And bullet holes, he mashes and bashes,
Than buys his self a whore,
Prettier than the doctor they got onboard.

Or

Jayne: Damn, that's mighty fine work. We didn't call him Stitch Hessian for nothing!

Or

Jayne: I knew the doctor had a secret, but I didn't think it was that he was The Hunchback of Notre Dame!

KMS
We’re not obsessed, we’re focused.---Gizzie

CUNNINGORANGETOQUE

Friday, June 24, 2005 10:41 PM

JAYNE:"Knew it, probably saw this shirt and turned tail."

OR

JAYNE:"Dear Diary:Today i was pompous and my sister was crazy, then we got captured by hillfolk, never to be seen again, it was the best day ever!....OOoohh!!But your clothes will be seen again!"

OR a twist

JAYNE:"Dear Diary:Today i was pompous and my sister was crazy, then we got captured by hillfolk, never toOOoohh!!A PURPLE SHIRT!"

OR

JAYNE:"It's a wonder i've kept this this long..."

/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Check out MY Caption Game (inspired by Caption Tightpants!!
www.livejournal.com/users/the_zeppo01
(P.S.-If you make any captions, please leave your name or codename so i dont have 10 anonymous entries....)
Time for some thrilling heroics!

DRAGONWINE

Saturday, June 25, 2005 2:34 AM

Simon OS: You actually found a Blue Sun "Golden Ticket" !?
Jayne: Yep. 2 weeks all expenses on Ripley's Pleasure Planet, and with this shirt I'm gonna get me some. Dong ma?
Kaylee OS: Oh, can you bring me back a "Never-lasting Bogmonster"?

It's a nothing part til you don't got one, then you have to go to ebay.....aaaaagh!

RYCE

Saturday, June 25, 2005 2:48 AM

Unbeknownst to many, Jayne was actually a stickler for organisation, always neatly folding his shirts before packing them.

KMS

Saturday, June 25, 2005 7:43 AM

Quote:

A little turbulence and Simon slips right out of Jayne’s grip.

OR

Simon (OS): Would you and my shirt like to be alone?

OR

The entire crew finds Jayne’s sudden crush on Simon disturbing. No more so than Simon himself.

OR

Jayne: Wash and wear, my ass. I’ve washed the darn thing, now where is he?

Jayne: This looks perfect for cleaning Vera.
Simon: Jayne!!! Not the Armani!!!

KMS
We’re not obsessed, we’re focused.---Gizzie

DARKJESTER

Saturday, June 25, 2005 12:27 PM

Jayne:"You talking to me? Are you talking... to me?"

or

After years of denial, Jayne realizes that he wants to look pretty.

or

Music in background: "Dance with me,
I want to be your partner, can't you see..."

MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."

TENTHCREWMEMBER

Saturday, June 25, 2005 1:09 PM

Jayne: I'm thinking...a fish!...NO! A dead fish...yeah, that'd give me an intimidatin' manner.

-or

Shirt: River isn't here. She's the shirt. You didn't know she could do that--
Jayne: Gorram freak's in my clothes! Mal! Mal! MAL!

-or

Jayne(to shirt): Cap'n? Cap'n? We've completed the improbabilty drive jump, you can be yer own self again.
Mal(OS): I'm standing right here.
Jayne(to shirt): I can hear you loud and clear, Cap'n!
Mal (OS): That's because I'm standin' right here
Jayne looks over to Mal: Oh.

-or

Shirt: Do you think I'm pretty?
Jayne: Umm...

-or a disturbing variation

**Jayne's secret of making friends with inanimates is revealed**
Shirt: Do you think I'm pretty?
Jayne: Umm...uhh...sure! And I will call you Doris. And you can bunk with Vera...

Cilantro!
TCM

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VOLSTOCK

Saturday, June 25, 2005 1:20 PM

As Jayne inspects his latest eBay aquistion, an artifact from the Earth that Was:

"Ain't no gorram way James Bond fit a gun in this shirt cause its way too small for Vera!"

Thinks to himself: "Wheres that fraud report button"

_____________________________________________________________

"I've seen you with no clothes on, never thought I'd see you naked."

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