Mitch Hedberg

POSTED BY: Caite
UPDATED: Tuesday, May 17, 2005 13:46
VIEWED: 4574
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CAITE

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 3:13 PM

I noticed some people mentioning Mitch Hedberg in the SNL thread, and I just wanted to start a thread...kind of in memorium. He was an amazing comedian, and he left life too young. A heart attack at 37 took his life a couple weeks ago, and he will be missed. Here are some of my favorite quotes from dear Mitch:

"If you want to talk to me after the show, I'll be f&%$king....surprised."

"Don't bother ringing it up, it's for a DUCK! There are SIX very hungry ducks outside, and they all want Sun Chips!"

"I think people should only be able to use their car horns three times a month. Then, if you go to use it a fourth time, you'd think, 's&%t, I wish I wouldn't have seen Ricky on the sidewalk!'."

"You know what keeps me from acting? F&$%king, auditions."

SOULOFSERENITY

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 3:29 PM

98 Rock here in Baltimore has been airing some of his comedy segments over the past several weeks, and the man was a machine-gunning comic genius. He will be missed.

______________________

But if your hand touches metal, I swear by my pretty floral bonnet, I will end you.

STATIC

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 3:54 PM

More from the "Hed". . .

This jacket is 'Dry Clean Only'. That means it's dirty.

I wish they made Cinnamon Bun Incense. That way, in the mornings, I could just light up a stick. And then my roommates would wake up with false hopes.

I love baked potatoes, but they take so long to make. Sometimes, I'll just throw one in the oven, even if I don't want one. Because by the time it's done. . .who knows?

I played golf... I did not get a hole in one, but I did hit a guy. That's way more satisfying...

This product that was on TV was available for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like a product that was available for three easy payments and one complicated payment. We can't tell you which payment it is, but one of these payments is going to hard.

==================================================
http://burstsofstatic.blogspot.com/

Evil, Lecherous Hump

STEVETHEPIRATE

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 4:03 PM

I wanted to burn a candle, but I couldn't find a candle holder, so I bought a cake.

----------------------------------------------
An escalator can never break. It can only become stairs. You would never seen an "Escalator temporarily out of order" sign, just "Escalator temporarily stairs. Sorry for the convenience."
- Mitch Hedberg, 1968-2005

WILDHEAVENFARM

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 4:18 PM

I don't remember giving him permission to die.

Mary
Always a beast, never a burden.

MOHRSTOUTBEARD

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 4:51 PM

The part that annoys me is that when Mitch died, everyone was too busy paying attention to a vegetable and an old guy.

I mean, who cares about the Pope? You can always get a new one. You can't elect a new Mitch Hedberg.

"I think Pringles' initial intention was to make tennis balls. But on the day that the rubber was supposed to show up, a big truckload of potatoes arrived. But Pringles was a laid-back company. They said 'Fuck it. Cut 'em up.'"

EMBERS

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 5:12 PM

at the official site:
http://www.mitchellhedberg.com/
you can leave condolences to his family

LISSA

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 8:02 PM

"my friend asked me if i wanted a frozen banana, and i said no. but i want a regular banana later, so...yeah."

"i haven't slept for 10 days, because that would be too long."

"last week i helped my friend stay put. it's a lot easier than helping someone move. i just went over his house and made sure he did not start to load sh*t into a truck."

"my apartment is infested with koala bears. it is the cutest infestation ever. way better than cockroaches. when i turn on the light a bunch of koala bears scatter. and i don't want 'em to, ya know. i'm like hey, hold on there fellas, let me hold one of you...and feed you a leaf. why do koala bears, they're so f*cking cute, why do they have to be so far away from me? we need to ship a few over, and i will apprehend one, and hold him, alright, and pet him on the back of his head."

~lissa, spwhore

SLAYER730

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 8:59 PM

When I first heard about Mitch Hedberg's death, it was April Fool's Day, so I thought "Yeah right...ha ha Mitch." Much to my sadness, I found out it was all too true. I first stumbled upon Mitch Hedberg's comedy on Comedy Central and proceeded to go out and get 2 of his cd's. (They're good for making you laugh out loud on the bus or in other public places where you appear to be insane). His brand of humor was the kind that made you laugh hysterically whether you were alone or with friends, and whether it was the first time seeing him or the millionth. He will be sorely missed. I guess maybe now he's with the Dufrenes. I hope he has a pet koala.

***Never judge a book by its movie***

CAITE

Tuesday, April 12, 2005 11:32 PM

I am listening to "Mitch All Together" right now...again, in memorium.

He was gone too soon from our world. He will be missed, am I right?

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