Disclaimer: Firefly and these characters are a gift from Joss.

WARNING – Spoilers for “War Stories”

RATING – Somewhere between R and NC-17 in that it contains consensual (though not graphic – patience, gentle reader, that's coming later) sex between two men and two women. Separately. It's not an orgy, people! Plus some torture – which somehow the censor is always less bothered about. Strange ...

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TRAUMA MEDICINE

Chapter 14: Check the barricades.

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Mal yanks off his boots and throws himself down on the bed. He don't bother undressin'. For a long while he lies with arms crossed behind his head starin' up at the ceiling, tryin' to ignore the naggin' ache in his balls an' how uncomfortably tight his always snug pants feel right now. It's all his own ruttin' fault anyhow. Ten minutes ago the Doc woulda been in here happily administerin' somethin' to ease his discomfort. Now he's more like to wanna inflict pain on him than the other thing. Yesu tamade but Mal is one stupid sonofabitch. Ought never have let the boy get to him. Shou'n't never've started admirin' his devotion to his sis, his smart mouth an' his determination. Shoulda stayed irritated by 'em. Gorramit – somehow Simon Tam's breached all of Mal's defences, bar one. An' that ain't gonna happen. Not never. Cos every damn thing Mal touches turns to dust an' he's learnt his lesson well. No touchin' .

He groans and rolls over onto his side, wishin' to hell that Zoe an' Wash would tone it down. Though it's mostly Wash doin' the yellin'.

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One look at Zoe's face tells Wash it's serious. And there's only one thing Zoe takes that seriously: Mal. That chou wang ba dan de too zai zi Mal. Sometimes Wash thinks Zoe shoulda just ... He kicks a chair over and glares at his wife, defying her to complain about it. She doesn't say a word.

“What the hell is this, Zoe?” he demands, his voice tight with anger. “You see – me - I just ignore that poor kid's crazy talk but h