Blue Sun Room FICTION - HUMOR

Grenades

Thursday, October 28, 2010

No OCs so can be read by anyone. Just a humorous little fic, inspired by Amdobell, and yes ... I know I should be writing Indigo ... but this sort of crept up on me! ONE-OFF, set any time.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 3923    RATING: 9.0 (G)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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“... and even though Crusher Harrison had his arm torn off, he vows he’ll be back in the ring to fight his latest opponent, Jumbaway Cho, next month. And that’s the end of the sports news. Now ... a word from our sponsors.”

“Do you get bored having to carry so many weapons? Do you ever wish they’d do more than one thing at a time? Do you want more flash and bang for your credit? Well, now you can. Why take two grenades into the shower when you only need ... the Whisjkers 3000! Totally waterproof, the Whisjkers has an explosive power equal to four normal grenades, as well as a brilliant whiter than white flare that will dazzle your enemies, leaving them defenceless. And, what’s more, the Whisjkers 3000 is silent! Surprise your foes, and make you the envy of your friends. And, while stocks last, each crate of 10 comes with a complimentary shower gel and back brush. So why not visit your local supplier and –“

“Hey, I was watching that!”

“No, Jayne.”

“Aw, but Mal –“

“No.”

“I can keep ‘em for special occasions.”

“No.”

“Like when we got Reavers on our tail.”

“No.”

“’N’ I could carry ‘em with me everywhere.”

“Jayne, you remember what happened last time?”

“Um ...”

“You had to retile the bathroom.”

“Yeah, but –“

“No, Jayne.”

“Ni shi shenme dongshi, gou niang yang de.”

“I heard that!”

“You were meant to!”

“Septic vat needs doing. And sighing like that ain’t gonna make me change my mind. Nor’s the cow eyes. Or the lip.”

“Gorramit.”

Comments
Thursday, 28 October 2010 12:53
funny little one off.
Thursday, 28 October 2010 13:06
LOVED it! Definitely a Jayne moment. Grenade porn... ;)
Thursday, 28 October 2010 15:48
This is just priceless!! Loved it!
Thursday, 28 October 2010 16:18
Ha. :) And I also like the blood sport Jayne was watching first. A reference to the illustrated story Fun with Dick and Jayne in Still Flying, maybe?

I was actually thinking of writing a story where Badger might have a taste for violent entertainment as well... I'd call the Persephone arena the Tartarus Ring.
Thursday, 28 October 2010 17:08
Heh, silly fun.

Wonder how the boxer will get his arm reattached to make his next fight?

Shower product giveaways for waterproof grenades! lolz
Thursday, 28 October 2010 22:59
Yep, classic Jayne! Him and his grenade fetish. Mind you there are times when "hey, wouldn't it be handy if we had some grenades?" Shiny, Ali D :~)
"You can't take the sky from me!"
Friday, 29 October 2010 00:21
Oh...oh...this was freaking hilarious! I could so picture Jayne/Adam and Mal/Nathan in this kind of scene, with Jayne pulling the kind of face he had when he tore the surgical tape from his abdomen in "Jaynestown"!

Awesome work here, Jane0904!
Friday, 29 October 2010 11:57
Very cute offering Jane! I really enjoyed it. Jayne being told he can’t play with his toyz….you captured to moment so well…..

BPZ

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