Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

TRAUMA MEDICINE: What ... not ever?

Thursday, September 23, 2004

Another explanation for what a fancy lady such as Inara is doing shipping out with a band of petty criminals.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 4848    RATING: 10.0 (PG13)    SERIES: FIREFLY

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Disclaimer: It all belongs to Joss Whedon.

This piece can be read as a standalone story which offers another explanation for what Inara is doing on Serenity. But it's actually the first chapter of a longer, darker Mal/Inara/Simon story. I'm a bit nervous about it.

Anyway, for this to work, Jayne has to have been on the ship before Inara, unlike what's implied in “Out of Gas.”

* * * * *

TRAUMA MEDICINE: So like ... never?

* * * * *

She was the youngest of the ones who'd survived. Just seventeen. Little more than a kid. But they took her anyway.

* * * * *

Jayne is in a powerful good mood. Spent the whole of las' night in a bordello with a whore so good he found hisself wantin' to kiss her on the mouth. And unlike most mornin'-afters, he ain't hungover. Cos she served him one hundred percent genuine rice wine, not that gorram wood alcohol stuff you get in most cat-houses. He whistles his way up the cargo bay ramp.

The whistle freezes in his mouth when he sees the Captain striding over towards him, face like thunder, fists clenched and shoulders tense. Jayne ain't been under his command more'n a few weeks but he's already developed a healthy, uh, respect for the man. Fear would be puttin' it too strong. He considers whether he should try to dodge the punch he's sure is comin' or if he should jus' brace hisself for it an' get it over with.

“You're late.”

“Thought you said we was leavin' at ten? 's only jus' gone nine.” Jayne takes a step to the side. Jus' in case.

Mal glares at him. “So you were thinkin' what? That you di'n't have to help out with stowin' the cargo? That we could do all the manual labour while you had yourself one more tumble?”

Jayne looks bewildered. “But .. we stowed all them crates las' night, di'n't we?”

“That ain't the point,” Mal snaps, suddenly realizin' he ain't real sure what the point is his own self and before Jayne can ask, he stalks off to the bridge.

Jayne narrows his eyes as he watches him go. Wondering.

* * * *

Comments
Thursday, 23 September 2004 19:19
Oh, Kispexi2... you've done some wonderful work before but you've truly surpassed yourself here! Absolutely remarkable. Serious, funny, tense, smutty--all the elements together, very Joss-like.

The feelings, the character play, the on-target dialog, the deft foreshadowing and setup. And--most excellent of all--that dropped in bit of italicized flashback that grew line by line, image by image. Brilliant.

"Mal's crazy, they all know that. Today's crazy flavour is mean." -- perfect line.

Jayne the philosopher psychoanalyst strikes again! ;-) ROTHFLMAO over "One of us'll have to do it." I know that wasn't your full punchline on the joke but the *us* in there was a hi-larious setup moment. Adored Kaylee's embarrassed yet eager 'should I?!' moment.

Wash's theorizing and Zoe's careful explanations were perfect. The 'leans' toward women bit well done.

And Zoe 'hiring' Inara in the first place. Well, heck, that just goes to soooo many interesting places. And it was really so very in-character Zoe that it worked beautifully for me.

Love it! Eager for more!
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 23 September 2004 19:42
Kisp you are truly a very creative individual, where do you get these ideas? I like what I see and really yearn to see where this goes. Thanks.

-Canton

P.S. Great dialogue with Jayne.
Thursday, 23 September 2004 20:02
Quell your anxiety about starting a longer story with this. It's an excellent start, and you're obviously up to the challenge.
Thursday, 23 September 2004 20:56
Absolutely adoring this story and I just love to bits the sheer originality of the set up. I can so see Zoe worrying about Mal and wanting to get him back into the world of the living and feeling. It was wonderful the way Zoe pitched the idea to Inara and the way you leaked out little pieces of Mal's darkest most painful nightmare had me crying inside. Both for the young girl and for Mal. Sigh. You have hit perfection in every line you have written here. *Xie xie ni* for a super shiny story, so beautifully told I am in awe. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 23 September 2004 21:05
Wonderful! I love the way you weave the opening sentance in throughout the story, revealing a little more each time. And how Zoe decides to "help" Mal and brings Inara on board. Can't wait to read more.
Thursday, 23 September 2004 21:08
Not sure why this thing keeps loging me out when posting...URGH!

un-signed Anony post is mine. :-D
ANONYMOUS
Thursday, 23 September 2004 23:01
Beautiful, Kis. As others have said already: very original setup! The meeting between Zoe and Inara is so vivid. You have a nice, light hand with the telling detail--the tree, the little boy, the smear of wet paint--in service of the character development. Excellent.
Friday, 01 October 2004 07:03
Oh, wow, wow, wow...

Hon, you must not feel nervous about writing another long fic. You got it down, girl. Such an interesting idea and gorramit, I can't wait for more! I love the way you write the characters, Mal, Zoe, and Inara especially, hell, everyone one of them too.--and the dialogue...it's so fresh and even paced, it's like watching the show.

Bravo on another epic start! ~applauds~

CE
HURRYSUNDOWN
Saturday, 02 October 2004 15:25
How the heck did I miss this when it went up?

'He already knows he's a mean old man. It's what keeps him from fallin' apart.' Lovely, lovely insight, that.

“One of us'll have to do it.” *howls with laughter*

Okay, I could quote the bits I loved all day, but it'd be a long post. Excellent story, and oh look, there's another chapter ... *dashes off to read chapter 2*
Friday, 19 May 2006 07:25
Thank you so much, kaynara! I've been feeling a bit wonky about writing so your comment cheered me up and inspired me!

How long have I been writing? I'd never written anything before The Tight Trousers but since then haven't been able to stop. so it's nearly three years now. All of it Firefly, because I'm just a tinsy bit obsessed!

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