Blue Sun Room FICTION - GENERAL

Cotton Avenue

Sunday, April 6, 2008

First attempt at fanfic! I may have got overly wordy, apologies... Title and opening quote from a Joni Mitchell song of same name.
One-shot; a chance for the crew to unwind on a rare night of peace. Some silliness ensues.

CATEGORY: FICTION    TIMES READ: 1640    RATING: 9.0 (G)    SERIES: FIREFLY

Tweet

Cotton Avenue

Nina Clark 2008

“To hear the shiny, shiny music; see all the shiny people dancing to it…” Joni Mitchell

The first assault on the senses was the heat. It introduced itself like a flirt, an infectiously lazy vibe, imperceptibly raising the bar for the evening’s revelry. As they wandered through the door, drawn from the street by the promising sounds from within, a muddle of limbs pulsed before them in a haze of colourful perspiration, squeezing and kneading like baker’s hands.

“Hell yeeah!” Kaylee exclaimed, already unzipping her gilet, the electric blue turning a deep purple from the club’s crimson glow. She turned to the Captain, her eyes alight with desire. Mal smiled beatifically at his mechanic, already fool to the intoxicating temperature. “We stayin’ then?” she smiled winningly at his nodding assent.

The aroma of chewed betel hung on the air, pervading the senses; a languorous hint. Wash made purposefully for the bar, whilst Zoë scanned the room subtly for potential threats. Happy to find no apparent troublemakers, she confirmed this with a nod to the Captain and moved over to her husband.

“Make mine a whisky...” he called after her.

Mal watched their intimacy, and felt if not a pang then something approaching it. In the rare moments he allowed himself pause for reflection, even the slightest peek through the crack into his psyche would alarm him. His innermost thoughts, when given illumination, were filled with…her. Of course.

Still, tonight was that illusive thing; a moment to unwind. To be himself, in the truest sense. The happy, charming man he once was. But there he went again, lingering. Not tonight. Not if he had any say in it. Where was that drink?

______________________ * ______________________ * _____________________

“Oh, honey… I never knew you could dance like that!” Kaylee grinned sweetly at River, who positively glowed as they moved from the dance floor to the table now inhabited by their fellow shipmates.

“Nor did I.” the younger woma

Comments
NINAC
Sunday, 06 April 2008 23:25
Forgot to include disclaimers (novice);
All characters the property of Joss Whedon and FOX. Not mine, just playin'...
Let me know if I need to re-submit with that stuff at top!
Cheers...
~
Monday, 07 April 2008 02:49
Loved your story and can't wait for more.
Monday, 07 April 2008 04:46
Well done, NinaC can't wait to see more.
Monday, 07 April 2008 08:58
I particularly liked Jayne's introspection about Kaylee and Simon and hiding his feelings, the Captain pretending to be more drunk than he was, Wash's shenanigans and River's dancing. Loved your use of language especially in narrative. Ali D :~)
You can't take the sky from me
Monday, 07 April 2008 09:17
Very nice piece! I like River, finding dancing makes her mind empty, and wondering if she carried on forever whether it would stay that way. And Mal pretending to be more drunk than he is ... except by the end I don't think that's the case any more! Good work, and I look forward to more.
NINAC
Monday, 07 April 2008 11:03
Thanks guys - feedback is a heady thing indeed! Much appreciated...
Wednesday, 16 April 2008 16:51
That was a really good fic, very shiny especially since it's your first attempt... I wouldn't have known! Love the way you nailed all of the character voice's, both external and internal... More please!!:)
Friday, 29 August 2008 12:36
Beautifully written.
Tuesday, 16 September 2008 12:22
I love how you interwove all the crew's reactions. Very well written and perfect comedic timing. Great job!

Post Your Comments

You must log in to post comments.