TEASER

EXT. FIELD - DAY

The sun is shining as the crew of Serenity is at a picnic in a grassy meadow. A basket full of food and drink is shared by all. Mal stands to make a toast.

MAL

"Before we get on with this--"

(looks to Jayne, who has started.

Then stops.)

"I want to make this 'Screw it' day an annual tradition. For too long--"

ZOE

"Since it is 'Screw it' day, can we screw the speech and get on with the food?"

KAYLEE

"And don’t forget the"

(reads bottle and severely

butchers)

"Champ Pagney?"

Without confirmation from Mal, the crew drains their glasses and begins helping themselves.

SIMON

"I’d like to thank the individual who thought it best to pair champagne with chicken."

KAYLEE

"What is this chicken you speak of?"

INARA

"It’s a bird. It tastes like...you know that protein fiber that tastes like everything? It tastes like that, but better."

ZOE

(to Jayne who is taking first and

most)

"Did you ever hear of 'he who is last shall be first?'"

JAYNE

"First to get screwed, yeah."

This gets a few laughs as we move down to River, who has not eaten or said anything. She smiles as she vicariously joins in their fun.

MAL

(to River)

"You look happy."

She does.

MAL

"Then let’s get started."

He takes off his coat and as he does we see that his hands are now a deep blue.

As River draws in breath to scream, we

SMASH CUT TO:

INT. SERENITY CARGO BAY - CONTINUOUS

River is laughing away in a corner as the crew carries on with daily business. Mal and Zoe doing inventory, Jayne cleaning various weapons, and the rest stop what they are doing in reaction to River.

KAYLEE

"Honey, what is it?"

RIVER

(still laughing and to herself)

"That looks just about right."

CUT BACK TO:

EXT. FIELD - CONTINUOUS

The rest of the crew now has blue hands and begins to advance on River. Kaylee is in the lead, with Inara and Simon following.

River begins to back up