CEDRIC

The other day I saw my friend Amber (proud owner of Jon Woodward's Nathan Fillion underwear) and her son Devon at the Oklahoma Renaissance Festival. Afterwards, we went out for Chinese food, and I had to show off the new Serenity shield decal on the back of my truck as well as the Serenity model on my dashboard. While Devon was oogling over it, Amber confessed that her proudest day as a mother occurred recently when Devon came home from school and said, "Today we played Serenity on the playground. I was Mal, and Bobby was Jayne. We made Angela's kid brother be a reaver, but he didn't want to."

CHAZZER

I don't get it. I NEVER get ill. Only here I am... feeling like warmed up leftover shite. All yesterday I had this bile-y taste in the back of my throat that would not go away. Then as I got into bed, it progressed into a full scale cold, which of course kept me from sleeping - I feel like the walking dead - and made me cough so hard that I kept on almost being sick. And I now have a headache. An in an hour I have to go to lecture AND THEN that gay meeting about my flat mates nicking those plants when I was in bed. Life is not good. Enough whinging, I've just noticed it's later than I thought. Gotta run xxxxxxxxx

THEA

Well I've always taken photog classes just to use the darkroom for my b&w printing. In the end, I always thought the cost of the class overall more than paid for the amount of time I'd get to print. And I was right.... For the first time, I paid to use a lab by the hour. I had to finish a project to hand in. The technicians tried to "shove" me in a situation where I'd have to expose print in one room and then take exposed paper into another room to develop it....After I told them that I made a reservation, and that there new offer didn't sound so convenient to me, they "miraculously" got the girl who was in my reserved room out...no hassle/ no fuss on her part...I'm guessin she was a friend... Once past that minor snaffoo, all went pretty easy...except for when the developer went exhausted and there was no employee around to make up a new batch...oh btw did I fail to mention that the only employee working the late shift (5-10 pm) had to leave, asked me to pay before it was over, and said it was ok to just leave things as they were and exit building on my own....very strange... Anyways, there was a nice older man in the darkroom next to mine. He was no longer printing, had the door open and was reading a paper in the dark...[ok part of me was thinking what the hell am i doing in a place where strangers are left alone in mostly deserted floor with no security]...but I took a chance and he ended up helping me...he no longer needed his developer and kindly brought that tray into my darkroom.... What have I learned from this encounter... 1)always ask for new developer before starting my time in darkroom 2)always let someone know where I'm going in case some (potential) psycho in the next darkroom might hurt me [nope, didn't tell a soul where I was going] 3)go to a place that has staff there to assist...till they close. .... So as I left white street and headed towards Canal st to catch the R train to head to Queens, I thought for $75 I could be a bit more aggressive in my needs next time. Thanks for reading my rant.So hasn't put me off photography. But the costs of film and printing, as well as time necessary to print, are really making my lust for a Nikon D200 grow stronger everyday. Santa if you're listening that would be a great gift. If you're feeling a budgetary pain, the D80 is not bad. Signing off...the way over the top and highly caffeinated photographer waves goodbye

MARINA

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RIVER6213

Yesterday I turned 45 years old and I had plenty of time to think about the last 45 years, or at least 40 of those years because all of the events that took place between years 0 through 5 are rather foggy in my mind. Of course while I was doing all of this mulling over the past I was drinking my head off, which seems to be what I do best these days besides make my workers at the job miserable, which I do enjoy in a sick, drunk with power sort of way. I’ve lived a pretty strange life when I really get down to it. I’ve realized that though I’m successful at the making money part of life, I really don’t have much of that enjoyment of life that people always seem to talk about. I’m unhappy most of the time, and to deal with that I engage in destructive behaviors in attempt to make myself feel “alright” about living in my own skin; I’m failing at this of course. Last night I drank 11 glasses of wine, and argued about religion and politics on in the voice chat section of Yahoo Chat. I wrote 4 reviews of certain restaurants I frequent, and of course since it’s me doing the writing, all of the reviews were totally negative. I ordered out for pizza and then forgot I ordered the pizza, so when my door bell started ringing I was annoyed because it was interrupting my yell fest with the people on Yahoo Chat. I stormed to the door and gave that pizza delivery girl a piece of my mind, and I guess I did it so well that the poor girl burst into tears. Nice Job River6213. I ended up apologizing to the girl, and gave her a $100 tip, and closed the door and carried my pizza into the computer room and sat down. As I was sitting there I realized once again that I need to change something about this life I’m living; it’s not a happy life. There is nothing fulfilling about it. All I seem to do is go about life making other people miserable, and granted I get a sick charge out of it, but come on! It’s not right. It’s mean, and serves no real purpose; it is an empty act. It could be worse of course. It could always be worse, and I should count my blessings that I have a comfortable life in the 1st place. So many other people are having a terrible go at life, so I should be grateful, which I am, but something is missing; something fundamental and important. I’ve decided to find out what it is that I’m missing. I need to eliminate the things that are negative in my life. One thing for sure is I think I drink way too much. I drink all the time, but I especially drink a lot when I’m at home, and I seem to do most of this drinking at home. I suspect that I’m a roaring alcoholic, but no AA for me! Those guys are a cult in its own right, and I will have nothing to do with cults. Also, I’ve taken up smoking cigarettes like crazy; this has got to go. I also think that I should get back into exercising because I remember feeling okay doing it, and I had a sense of accomplishment when I looked in the mirror. It’s interesting when people get to be a certain age they start finding things to change in their lives in order to feel a certain way. For myself right now I feel ugly and mean, and neurotic, and crazy. Another thing I need to change right away is my need to be mean to people. Being mean to someone makes me feel like I’m in charge and in control of the situation, which is stupid BTW, but I do it anyway. Everything’s a war with me, and it doesn’t matter where that war takes place. It could be in a board meeting or the checkout line in a department store; I fight the fight all the time even when there is no reason to fight…does this seem right to you? I need to change into someone better and more alive than me. Right now I’m sitting at my desk writing this when I should be working. I have a hangover to end all hangovers, and a stomach that feels acidic, and I think I want to throw up. -River

CONSTANCE

I have 6 days left (before handing in my thesis not to live (i hope)) I have 25 pages to write Because of this Internet havent been this interesting since 96 I am hungry I have been drinking way to much coffee I am (also because of the thesis)addicted to fanfiction (this surprises me a great deal) I am haunted by thoughts like "I need to get a job" "you should honour your student loan and get a career" "I want to be five years old again" "the gummibear song was kinda neat" I am torn between beeing the cynic Im often accused of being and a hopless romantic... This is a problem for me in sertain discussions I tend to sit on the seat directly over the wheel on the bus My highest wish at the moment is to read a book that has nothing to do with my thesis... Having a keycard that gives me acsess to the institute at night makes me feel important, even though it does not MAKE me imporant Im broke Sitting and writing all day makes me childish and giggely I wanna go home Thank you for listening. I will be back another time with an update on my totally uneventful life (but at least it mine and mine alone) "You know what it says in the will; The one who takes care of my Constance gets my hat, gets my shoes, gets my extragavanza" (Kontroll på kontinentet- Kaizers Orchestra translated by me...wooo)