Why Americans are dying earlier than their international peers
POSTED BY: Niki2
UPDATED: Thursday, November 24, 2022 19:21
VIEWED: 5137
PAGE 4 of 5
Quote:Well.perhaps being told that you're great at something, and then realising in later life that you're not, is a cause for resentment in itself? best to be honest from the start, in my view.
Originally posted by BYTEMITE:
That's a lot of generalizations, Peacekeeper. I have never felt like I am better than others or been disappointed when I fall short of expectations, and my parents gave up on me when I was about five, shortly after my depression developed. I don't blame them. It is the reality of the world, some people are exceptional and I am on the deep end of the shit bucket, why waste time on that?
And I don't go to therapists because they're all evil bastards who manipulate you and medicate you into a coma and cause all sorts of side problems that degrade quality of life, then they have the gall to call that "progress".
Anyway, no. If anything Americans aren't too competitive, rather they're too coddled, told they're great at stuff when they're really terrible. I'm not blind, I see how it is, us isolated and content in our little cages from the hardships of the world, smug in our feelings of superiority. And as for standing on my own two feet, I will always have to stand alone. No hugs. No one to hold my hand through the hard times, as though that makes any difference what-so-ever, the hard times still happen and the rest of you with all your laughable affections and friendships are powerless to stop it.
With the grace of age, commander, we learn to accept.
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Quote:
Well.perhaps being told that you're great at something, and then realising in later life that you're not, is a cause for resentment in itself? best to be honest from the start, in my view.
Oh? And what do you think I was told I was good at?
You think my resentment is the result of excess PRAISE? That what you see here arose from a position of satisfaction with the world?
Ultimately it doesn't matter if other people lie to you. What matters is if you lie to yourself.
I can't speak for all of America, but I doubt broad scale generalizations and comparisons between Britain and American attitudes reflect reality any more than my opinion would reflect reality if I said that the interest in the royal family among the commonwealth is a strange display of living vicariously through others and escapism from a personal hell of barely acknowledged despair.
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wow, you really are an angry person!!!
With the grace of age, commander, we learn to accept.
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Glad we're on the same page. The question is, are you ready to acknowledge your own anger yet?
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Quote:
Originally posted by peacekeeper:
It seems evident that most of you seem to have a bloody therapist to help you with the most basic functions of life. Every time you have a minor hiccup, you seem to dive into the therapist's chair,rather than learn to cope with these things on your own.
Uh, I take issue with that.
Therapy is a way of learning exactly that: learning to cope with your problems. Plenty of people try and "cope" through drug use, drinking or they are simply in denial until they drag themselves into a truly acute crisis or they make the same mistakes all over again.
Presenting trying to get professional help to illuminate and break harmful cycles as some kind of lazy cop-out or simple lack of will power is incredibly condescending and offensive.
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PK:Quote:
I take note of the fact that a lot of Americans are being diagnosed with depression. This is a serious point I'd like to address. Do you think this has something to do with your culture of aspiration?
Oh, hell yeah! In some circles, kids are pressured from pre-school on to compete, and there is quite a bit of stigma against those who don't "work", such as the disabled, etc. In many cases people feel they "are" what they "do" for a living, and we don't get the kind of time off Europeans do (dunno about you Brits)--not by a quarter! In many jobs here you have to work a full year before you get any vacation time, there are maybe seven (?) holidays a year and you have to accrue sick leave, which is usually 5-10 days a year. In most families both parents work, so weekends are spent doing marketing, etc. That IS a generalization, there are many variations, but you can see how that would contribute to an increase in unhealth. Quote:
It seems evident that most of you seem to have a bloody therapist to help you with the most basic functions of life.
That's a stereotype. Actually very FEW Americans go to therapists.Quote:
The results of the annual "Stress in America" survey by the American Psychological Association, released last week, found that while 85 percent of Americans say their stress level has remained the same or increased in the past year, just 4 percent of people use therapy as a way to combat that stress. More at http://www.news-medical.net/news/20091109/Survey-finds-fewer-Americans
-use-therapy-to-manage-stress.aspx
It's a common stereotype, but a false one.Quote:
You are a very emotional nation, which again, isnt necessarily a negative thing, but maybe The Briitsh.... in a better position to cope with adversity.
Well, yes, in general we are an emotional people, compared to the Brits. But that's not as true as it once was; a quick Google search finds numerous articles about it.Quote:
are the upper lips of British people today as stiff as they once were? According to our poll, no.
Asked if British people these days still have a stiff upper lip in terms of being restrained in displaying their emotions, a majority (57%) of Britons say no, they do not, while only 33% say British people do have a stiff upper lip. Meanwhile, 62% of the public also believes that British people have become more emotional in recent decades. Only 14% say British people have become less emotional, and 18% believe they are about the same. More at http://yougov.co.uk/news/2012/10/04/do-brits-still-have-stiff-upper-li
ps/
That's your own people's views and in that case only a survey.
For one thing, your "stiff upper lip" wasn't always true. Check out Ian Hislop's Stiff Upper Lip: An Emotional History of Britain (one article on it at http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19728214 . You may find yourself quite surprised.
For another, curbing one's emotions can be quite unhealthy, just as being overly emotional can be. Which is worse is up for debate, but either taken to the extreme can be bad for a person. Moderation between the two is probably the most healthy route.Quote:
seem to have somewhat of a "victim culture" on occasion
That may be true, or it may be something you've heard some of our politicians and pundits say so many times that you believe it. I can't know which, nor can you, because what we hear/see are people talking about it and using it as a wedge issue, and choosing their examples to verify their claims.
There is no question that British society is less emotional than American. Whether that's good or bad I cannot say, but I know there are misperceptions involved.
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Good post Niki. I think its easy to have ideas about other cultures that may have some basis in fact but have been carried out of proportion, we've all done it and the best way to get out of that way of thinking is to get to know people from that culture and see for yourself if those things are true or to what extent they are.
Peacekeeper, if you wonder things it is okay to ask, there are no dumb questions after all, okay maybe there are, but that's not relevent to this point.
Why are so many people diagnosed with depression? I think that the diagnostic criteria may be too vague, I mean we've all seen those goofy adverts "Are you feeling depressed? Ask your doctor if --- is right for you". Oh how I wish those were illegal and weren't allowed to be shown on television. If you have trouble then go get checked out, but don't let adverts make you think you need this or that medicine. Sorry, side note, but I think its relevent. Do they have those stupid adverts in England?
"A completely coherant River means writers don't deliver" KatTaya
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My daydream is ... when I retire I'll ...
seriously take up photography
seriously take up clothes design
seriously take up woodworking
create a plant info/ photo database and incorporate it into a CAD program
sleep more
see more movies
live in the local college/ university libraries looking up everything I always wanted to look up
go back to college and re-take all the classes I ever took - what ARE those young'uns learning nowadays?
Man - what I could do with extra time ...
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Quote:Oh,hey.fair comment.Perhaps I have fallen into the trap of following a British Media stereotype?? Guilty as charged.Obviously, when therapy is absolutely required, it is required. No offense was intended, and my apology is offered in this case.
Originally posted by AgentRouka:Quote:
Originally posted by peacekeeper:
It seems evident that most of you seem to have a bloody therapist to help you with the most basic functions of life. Every time you have a minor hiccup, you seem to dive into the therapist's chair,rather than learn to cope with these things on your own.
Uh, I take issue with that.
Therapy is a way of learning exactly that: learning to cope with your problems. Plenty of people try and "cope" through drug use, drinking or they are simply in denial until they drag themselves into a truly acute crisis or they make the same mistakes all over again.
Presenting trying to get professional help to illuminate and break harmful cycles as some kind of lazy cop-out or simple lack of will power is incredibly condescending and offensive.
With the grace of age, commander, we learn to accept.
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I also apologize. I think I was being rude.
And I've also derailed this thread. I should probably make a pact with you all to not comment on psychology or health related threads, because I feel compelled to make my cynical anti-positivity views known. Asking for understanding is unfair of me.
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