France: a lesson
POSTED BY: Aliasse
UPDATED: Monday, August 30, 2010 00:14
VIEWED: 6927
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This is the second in my series about European nations for people living between the east and west coasts of the United States of America, and it deals with: France.
France, like Germany, is a type of place. The people of France are widely known as ‘the French’. The language of the French – also called ‘French’ – is a beautiful and complex one, with over 50 ways of saying ‘strike action’. The French took their language to the British Isles in the exchange programme of 1066, as a result of which words like ‘government’ and ‘douche’ entered the English language.
The programme was led on the French side by Normans, descendents of Norse men from Scandinavia, hence their very blond hair and wide cheekbones. These Normans were also Jews, similar to the Jews of Germany (see previous post), but with much sharper teeth and legs that bent backwards like plastic superheroes. Imagine the fearsome spectacle they presented when they were first spotted from the English coast in their flotilla of acorn cups.
In subsequent centuries the French made their presence felt in many parts of the world, in spite of being entirely landlocked, particularly along the Cote d’Azur. Their leader during this entire period was Louis XIV of Saxe-Weimar, an insignificant scion of a lesser branch of the British Royal Family and grandfather of Napoleon Bonaparte. His adventures took him to Switzerland, Canada – where he received a particularly fraternal welcome from the people of Quebec – the Nazi Republic of New Orleans, the Caribbean, Africa’s Gold Coast, the Indian Ocean, and Indo-China. Since their defeat by Vietnamese Jews (who look down their noses at their European cousins) at Dien Bien Phu in 1954, the French have bored the whole world by making films about it, as though they were the only ones ever to have their arses kicked really hard and lose a war.
France today is by and large a peaceful country of peaceful people who spend their days tending their crops of cheese and cigarettes. For further information on this, please consult:
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It's not personal. It's just war.
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Kaneman's lesson. Frenchwomen are hairy arm-pit and legged whores, they cheat on their small dicked counterparts, they die by the thousands in a heat wave(in a fucking modern city), their food sucks, their accent is hilarious, and they make bad movies. Add that they are fucking cowards and I am spewing cum all over this thread....That they have been cockold-ed by the Muslims in their country....is priceless.....just one girl's opinion.......
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Quote:
Originally posted by kaneman:
Kaneman's lesson. Frenchwomen are hairy arm-pit and legged whores, they cheat on their small dicked counterparts, they die by the thousands in a heat wave(in a fucking modern city), their food sucks, their accent is hilarious, and they make bad movies. Add that they are fucking cowards and I am spewing cum all over this thread....That they have been cockold-ed by the Muslims in their country....is priceless.....just one girl's opinion.......
Well, of course, but I thought all this was too obvieuse to mention...
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Ya left out the part about Bien Dien Phu being the continuation of a long tradition of failing to win wars and having to be bailed out by someone, anyone, else.
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Which is why smarter minds contracted that sorta thing out to the foreign legion, which as a rule kicks some serious ass, or at least used to.
Also, nobody likes the french, even the french mock the french...
But that's all in good fun, they're pretty cool folks, despite Robespierre making it into a nightmare, they found the idea of dispensing with aristocracy and social classes so appealing that when a nation was founded on that concept, they supported it wholeheartedly even against their fellow europeans, and even commisioned and sent a huge statue which eventually became a worldwide icon, funded primarily by "the pennies of the poor" on the strength of their belief in the virtues that icon would stand for.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statue_of_Liberty
For that alone, I shall always have a resevoir of good will towards the french, however strange that I may find them.
-Frem
PS. This is also why it terribly offends me when anti-immigration or america-firsters use the image of Liberty as a mask upon their viciousness, since she herself is an immigrant, as we all once were.
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Quote:
Originally posted by Fremdfirma:
Which is why smarter minds contracted that sorta thing out to the foreign legion, which as a rule kicks some serious ass, or at least used to.
Also, nobody likes the french, even the french mock the french...
But that's all in good fun, they're pretty cool folks, despite Robespierre making it into a nightmare, they found the idea of dispensing with aristocracy and social classes so appealing that when a nation was founded on that concept, they supported it wholeheartedly even against their fellow europeans, and even commisioned and sent a huge statue which eventually became a worldwide icon, funded primarily by "the pennies of the poor" on the strength of their belief in the virtues that icon would stand for.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Statue_of_Liberty
For that alone, I shall always have a resevoir of good will towards the french, however strange that I may find them.
-Frem
PS. This is also why it terribly offends me when anti-immigration or america-firsters use the image of Liberty as a mask upon their viciousness, since she herself is an immigrant, as we all once were.
Dude. You have one leg....
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Quote:
Originally posted by Fremdfirma:
(T)hey found the idea of dispensing with aristocracy and social classes so appealing that when a nation was founded on that concept, they supported it wholeheartedly even against their fellow europeans, and even commisioned and sent a huge statue...For that alone, I shall always have a resevoir of good will towards the french, however strange that I may find them.
But I hope that you can appreciate the French for things that aren't to do with the United States, lest you confirm the view I'm forming that fff.net is a not a place for anyone with any understanding of Europe.
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Quote:
Originally posted by NewOldBrownCoat:
Ya left out the part about Bien Dien Phu being the continuation of a long tradition of failing to win wars and having to be bailed out by someone, anyone, else.
You mean the Second World War? Any other examples? This post is not in fact a dig at the French.
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If your day is so boring that you'd think of writing a satire of the French, imagine how boring mine is if I'm responding to it.
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