Destiny, Episode 12: Crew Tryouts (The Resurrection)
POSTED BY: SoulOfSerenity
UPDATED: Monday, April 28, 2008 16:16
VIEWED: 21876
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Link to the previous thread:
http://www.fireflyfans.net/thread.asp?b=2&t=20785
Okay!! Since we seem to have revived Destiny (yay!), and even though the other thread was still young, I thought it might be a good time to start a new thread! TheRealMe made a very good point: we seem to be a bit unsure as to who does what around here! Here's our crew listing as of now:
THE CREW OF DESTINY
Amylisai: Crazy sister aboard the Destiny. Master of chop-stick-fu.
CallMeSerenity aka Serenity: First Officer.
CastIronJack: A gun hand. (Job titles include “Funny Man” and possibly “Chief Nurse”) Been missing a while.
Flechette: Cook.
Jazaf: Navigator.
Needy: A boy whore. Currently shrunk to one third normal size (all over, that is).
SafeAt2nd: Handyman.
SoulOfSerenity: Captain.
TheRealMe aka Doctor Me: Ship’s Physician and Mad Scientist. Medical license in dispute on some worlds.
Wildigstart aka Willie: Gifted mechanic on the planet that Destiny crashed on.
THE NOT-QUITE-REAL PEOPLE
Blossom: Red-headed love-bot of Doctor Me.
Bubbles: Blonde love-bot of Doctor Me.
Buttercup: Brunette love-bot of Doctor Me.
Jayne aka Irish Jayne, aka Jayne-bot: Flechette’s love-bot, modeled after Jayne Cobb. Father/builder of Lexa.
Lexa: The robotic “daughter” of Jayne and Flechette.
Original Kimmel aka OK aka Jimmy: Apparently, a creation of Doctor Me, who is supposing that he should have exercised more taste.
Trebek: Alex Trebek, the game show host (Huh?).
So it seems that we may be in need of a few crew members (or existing ones actually working for a living on my ship), so let the tryouts begin! The following positions will be up for grabs:
Pilot - will include flying through a mine field blindfolded
Engineer - will include repairing the engine during freefall
Cargo Master - will include a relay race involving protien bars and harvested organs
Shepherd - well, let's just say good luck converting some of my crew!!!
Let the tryouts begin!!!
______________________
Soul, Security Chief of the Sereni-Tree, Captain of Destiny.
Mantichorus: "So is there a reason they call you 'Soul'?"
Soul (after a long pause): "Yeah. Because I have one."
http://havenofsouls.livejournal.com/
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Well!
The only reason that I became a quack doctor in the first place is that all the jobs that I was good at were taken! Now some have opened up.
But I've kind of gotten used to being a doctor, as long as I close my eyes when any kind of blood is involved.
TheRealMe, Doctor of Destiny!
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Quote:
Originally posted by TheRealMe:
The only reason that I became a quack doctor in the first place is that all the jobs that I was good at were taken! Now some have opened up.
Well, feel free to try out for anything!!!
______________________
Soul, Security Chief of the Sereni-Tree, Captain of Destiny.
Mantichorus: "So is there a reason they call you 'Soul'?"
Soul (after a long pause): "Yeah. Because I have one."
http://havenofsouls.livejournal.com/
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Doctor Me revs up his chainsaw.
"I think that I would be good at the organ harvesting part!"
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EW!
Serenity ignores Dr. Me's last statement and runs down the corridor Soul pointed towards.
"SAFE!" She hollers. "YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM ME FOREVER!!! I WILL FIND YOU!!! Best to come out now and face me like man, you purple bellied coward!!!!"
Serenity,
President of The Juggled Gosling Chatroom
Bride8
http://callmeserenity.livejournal.com/
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"HEY!! What about me!?! I Ain't just another pretty face youknow. I know my way around... well... stuff! Waddya need an engineer for?"
Safe's voice echos through the ship reaching Soul and Dr. Me. It is quickly followed by a high pitched scream as Safe's yelling gave away his hiding spot.
"Come back here you big chicken!" Serenity's yells also reach Soul.
A loud CLUNG echos through the ship and Soul and Dr. Me turn as one, "He forgot to duck again..."
"Y'know, he's lucky that low archway doesn't take his fool head off." Souls says to Dr. Me. "Although, I can't see as he would miss it."
Dr. Me's eye light up as he ponders the feasibility of headless crew members.
Soul shakes his head sadly, "I really gotta set higher standards when hiring on crew..."
_______________________________________________________________
"Got a headful of lightning
And a heart full of rain
And I know that I said
I'd never do it again
Oh and I love you sweet baby but I always take the long way home."
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Safe's yells do indeed give away his location.
Serenity swoops down on him, gun raised, as he enters the common room. He grabs a wrench someone left lying around and holds it in front of him in defense.
"Oh, please!" she says. "You'd never hit me with that!" She lowers her gun and grabs him by the shirt collar, pulling him close, her fist clenched.
"Your pranks are driving me CRAZY!! And they stop. NOW."
Safe flinches, ready for her punch. She pulls him closer. 
CLUNG! He drops the wrench.
"You owe me new powder." She whispers, before letting him go and walking away.
Serenity,
President of The Juggled Gosling Chatroom
Bride8
http://callmeserenity.livejournal.com/
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Dusting himself off and catching his breath after his "near-death-by-crotch-asphyxiation", Needy stands tall whilst his crewmembers chase each other about
"Back to normal, I guess" he sighs
Needy had been ignored for too long of late, and being knocked over by Me was the last straw
Grabbing a hold of his comm, he makes an announcement which sounds throughout the ship.
"Excuse me. Is this thing on? Ahem. Yes, anyway, I would like to make an announcement. I sure hope this thing is working, otherwise I will look mighty stupid"
"It's working" Soul calls from down the corridor.
"Excellent." Needy replies, before continuing on the intercom system. "I have been doing a lot of thinking of late, and I realise that my current state has not exactly done wonders for my job as male companion, so I would like to announce my immediate retirement."
Collective jaws drop. Everyone on board knows how much Needy loved his job, but unfortunately the short little tyke was right, there's not much you can do when you're 2ft tall. It turns out size does matter in this profession
"What you going to do?" Soul asked, concerned for the ex-boy whore
"That would be my second announcement... I would like to become this ship's shepherd"
Collective jaws drop off crewmembers heads.
-----
Needy. Male Companion:
First Boy Whore of Destiny
Incredibly Confused Companion of SereniTree
-----
www.myspace.com/needsalt
http://needsalt.livejournal.com/
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Doctor Me seems a little surprised as he looks down. “Oh, Needy, was that you attached to my groin area just then? Sorry, I thought that sensation was something left over from my earlier time with… Ummm… Oh, never mind. But you do remind me that long ago I agreed to research some method to change you back to normal. Right! Now where is that goop?”
Doctor Me starts pulling vials out of the many pockets of his long white lab coat, shaking his head, and tossing them over his shoulder one by one. Then he stops and smiles, staring cross-eyed at a vial of sickly green, glowing, viscous fluid. “Ah! This is the one!”
Holding the vial in his left hand, he continues to rummage around in his pockets with the right. “Ow!” Squinting with pain, Doctor Me pulls his hand out, revealing it to be impaled through the palm with the needle of a syringe. “Ow! I hate needles!”
Clamping the vial in his teeth, Doctor Me pulls the syringe out of his right palm with a gasp and rubs the needle once or twice on the sleeve of his lab coat. Then he takes the vial from his teeth, jams the needle in, and carefully draws out a measure of the strange fluid. Finally, he tosses this last vial over his shoulder. The vial breaks when it hits the floor and the remaining fluid coalesces together and scurries away.
“Needy, I can absolutely guarantee that this mixture has a 17% chance of altering your genetic structure in a positive way!”
Needy is skeptical. “What do you mean by ‘positive way’?”
Doctor Me’s brow furrows as he ponders this. “Well, I suppose it means that you, or some part of you, will end up bigger than now.” Doctor Me’s face brightens. “Or maybe you’ll grow a NEW part that will get bigger!”
Needy does not seem convinced.
Doctor Me gets defensive. “Hey, it works! It produced that lobster-man creature. And THAT thing started out as a little kitten.” Doctor Me stops, and concentrates. “I mean a cockroach. It started out as a cockroach. Or a bunny. Or… or… Ummm.. Hey, has anyone seen Trebek lately?”
Doctor Me dashes off to inventory his surviving lab animals.
TheRealMe, Doctor of Destiny!
President of Serenity's Boys
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"...Not exactly the reaction I was expecting..."
Safe wanders into engineering, eyes glazed over, absently putting things away.
"... not an unpleasant reaction mind you..." Safe puts screwdrivers in his lunch pail and his sandwich in the cot and his pillow, with some effort, in the toolbox.
"...caught me by surprise... my, what a surprise..."
Safe shakes his head "Wait! What's this about Needy? A sheppard? That's just all manner of wrong. Nice little fellow and all, but Sheppard material??" Pauses considering.
"Although... some people do consider the pillow a confessional of sorts, and he is somewhat of an expert on pillows..."
_______________________________________________________________
"Got a headful of lightning
And a heart full of rain
And I know that I said
I'd never do it again
Oh and I love you sweet baby but I always take the long way home."
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