Historians Demote Bush to 'Dwarf President'
POSTED BY: misbehaven
UPDATED: Sunday, August 27, 2006 10:10
VIEWED: 2164
PAGE 1 of 3
The Satirical Political Report: http://satiricalpolitical.com/
HISTORIANS DEMOTE BUSH TO ‘DWARF PRESIDENT’
By Don Davis
In a move heavily anticipated for the last five years, the National Academy of Historians has ratified what had been generally accepted knowledge, and officially demoted George W. Bush to status of “Dwarf President.”
Although Bush stands over six feet tall, both the microscopic size of his brain, and his total lack of any gravitas, immediately disqualified him from the definition of a full-fledged President.
As with Pluto, which has also been reduced to “dwarf status,” Bush has a relatively eccentric orbit, inclined to six degrees of separation from reality.
Also, in another parallel with Pluto, Bush orbits among various icy wrecks, including Iraq, New Orleans and the entire federal budget.
Some historians actually recommended that Bush be further downgraded to “satellite,” given his inability to break the gravitational pull of the Neo-Con Solar System, also known as Cheney Destroy-e-alis. Still others voted to designate him as a mere ass-teroid.
When informed that he had been accorded the same treatment as Pluto, Bush replied that he “appreciates that, since Pluto was always my favorite Disney character.”
Oh, come on now. You know that was funny. 
"The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation."
-Bertrand Russell
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
Quote:
Originally posted by misbehaven:
The Satirical Political Report: http://satiricalpolitical.com/
HISTORIANS DEMOTE BUSH TO ‘DWARF PRESIDENT’
By Don Davis
In a move heavily anticipated for the last five years, the National Academy of Historians has ratified what had been generally accepted knowledge, and officially demoted George W. Bush to status of “Dwarf President.”
Although Bush stands over six feet tall, both the microscopic size of his brain, and his total lack of any gravitas, immediately disqualified him from the definition of a full-fledged President.
As with Pluto, which has also been reduced to “dwarf status,” Bush has a relatively eccentric orbit, inclined to six degrees of separation from reality.
Also, in another parallel with Pluto, Bush orbits among various icy wrecks, including Iraq, New Orleans and the entire federal budget.
Some historians actually recommended that Bush be further downgraded to “satellite,” given his inability to break the gravitational pull of the Neo-Con Solar System, also known as Cheney Destroy-e-alis. Still others voted to designate him as a mere ass-teroid.
When informed that he had been accorded the same treatment as Pluto, Bush replied that he “appreciates that, since Pluto was always my favorite Disney character.”
Oh, come on now. You know that was funny. ;biggrin:
"The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation."
-Bertrand Russell
----
I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
*ROFL*
*Wipes tears from eyes*
Good stuff...good stuff. Gotta go change my pants now!
Kelkhil
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
In a related announcement, the "Dwarf President" has now been designated "UB an A Hole 313" and it was noted that the demotion was in large part due to the fact that Ub an A hole 313 has lost the ability to be dominant over smaller bodies in its path. Ub an A hole313's course through the heavens has long been under the sway of the much larger body, planet "Dick CheneyCeres" which has also lost much of it's former status... and hopefully will be downgraded as well.
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
In a related announcement, the "Dwarf President" has now been designated "UB an A Hole 313" and it was noted that the demotion was in large part due to the fact the Ub an A hole 313 has lost the ability to be dominant over smaller bodies in its path. Ub an A hole313's course through the heavens has long been under the sway of the much larger body, planet "Dick CheneyCeres" which has also lost much of it's former status... and hopefully will be downgraded as well.
oh the tears! The TEARS! *FMF is in a fetal position on the floor from the laughter*
----
I am on The List. We are The Forsaken and we aim to burn!
"We don't fear the reaper"
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
*laughter...so much laughter...*
Please make it stop. I already had to change my clothes once today!
Kelkhil
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
Quote:
Originally posted by Dayve:
In a related announcement, the "Dwarf President" has now been designated "UB an A Hole 313" and it was noted that the demotion was in large part due to the fact that Ub an A hole 313 has lost the ability to be dominant over smaller bodies in its path. Ub an A hole313's course through the heavens has long been under the sway of the much larger body, planet "Dick CheneyCeres" which has also lost much of it's former status... and hopefully will be downgraded as well.
ROFL. Thanks for the update.
"The only thing that will redeem mankind is cooperation."
-Bertrand Russell
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
If that's the case, then John Kerry ( being Bush's intellectual inferior ) is demoted to satillite to said dwarf planet. 
People love a happy ending. So every episode, I will explain once again that I don't like people. And then Mal will shoot someone. Someone we like. And their puppy. - Joss
" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "
NOTIFY: N | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME
LOL
Dayve,
ROFL
Auraptor,
Did you miss the memo? Kerry was demoted to space junk some time ago.
NOTIFY: Y | REPLY | REPLY WITH QUOTE | PERMALINK | TOP | HOME