Global War on...
POSTED BY: citizen
UPDATED: Wednesday, August 16, 2006 22:40
VIEWED: 1553
PAGE 1 of 1
...Claustrophobia.
You heard it here first folks, we've now declared war on Claustrophobia! Claustrophobics are planning their next big strike, preparing to take down airplanes through attacks of claustrophobia!
Quote:
A London to Washington flight diverted to Boston with a fighter escort after the pilot declared an emergency following a disturbance on board.
...
Nenette Day, a spokeswoman for the Federal Bureau of Investigation in Boston, said the 60-year-old woman was apparently claustrophobic and had become disruptive on the flight.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/4799057.stm
Could it be? Al Qaeda has started it most devious and destructive plan yet! Are Terrorist Grandma's being trained as we speak in Al Qaeda training camps to argue cabin crew to death? Could they be planning to sabotage the aircrafts controls with their false teeth?
Is my grandmother really dead, or did she fake her death in order to join Al Qaeda's top secret crack OAP squad?
Initial reports said that she had 'suspicious' items and Arabic texts possibly linked to Al Qaeda. These claims have proven to be false.
I'm not saying anyone flat out lied but how does one mistake thin air or Hello magazine for Al Qaeda Terrorist instructions written in Arabic?
In other news the extra security at Airports have proven to be well worth it, with the only breach being that of a 12 year old boy who neither had a passport or ticket.
Quote:http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/4796199.stm
An airline boss has admitted to "multiple failures" after a boy managed to board one of its planes without tickets during the security alert.
How could he have pulled of such an amazing infiltration? Could he be the diabolical master mind of Al Qaeda? A super evil pygmy genius who has shaved his moustache to avoid detection?
Al Qaeda, whatever you say about them they certainly are not an ageist Terrorist organisation.
More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.

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LOL.
Well, she might have inspired terror, but she didn't kill anyone, so Al-Qaeda must be slacking.
Can't Take My Gorram Sky 
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Well obviously the only reason no one was killed was because of the two jets scrambled for intercept.
More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.
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Is that what happened??? For pity's sake! Sky News has this whole alert thing about a female passanger who was carrying vaseline and matches and a note about Al Qaeda!!!
Although I'm not sure what threat vaseline poses. We did have a discussion in a male and female imponderables thread about Jessica Alba being smeared in the stuff to get into a particularly form fitting costume. Maybe it was too distracting for the air crew? Perhaps some passangers took offence?

More animations available at http://desktophippie.googlepages.com
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Quote:She was 60, the thought of a 60 year old woman smearing her naked body with vaseline in order to squeeze into a form fitting cat suit is enough to cause serious mental harm. Imagine seeing it in person.
Originally posted by DesktopHippie:
Is that what happened??? For pity's sake! Sky News has this whole alert thing about a female passanger who was carrying vaseline and matches and a note about Al Qaeda!!!
Although I'm not sure what threat vaseline poses. We did have a discussion in a male and female imponderables thread about Jessica Alba being smeared in the stuff to get into a particularly form fitting costume. Maybe it was too distracting for the air crew? Perhaps some passangers took offence?
Al Qaeda's plot grows ever more devious.
"We will strike down the infidels with live Granny porn! muwhahahaha!!!"
More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
No one can see their reflection in running water. It is only in still water that we can see.
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I saw this on the news this morning. It is on CNN, MSNBC, and FOX, and it is all they have been talking about all day long. You would think that claustrophobic grandmothers are the most important news in the world. The three big news outlets in the U.S. have become a joke (well, FOX always has been). They contiually f
k up the stories with misinformation, and they always focus on one or two news events, or in this case a non-event, to the exclusion of all others. It is nearly impossible to receive worthwhile news here anymore. The only way this story might have deserved the media attention it has garnered is if those F-15's actually shot the aircraft of the sky. Thankfully, that did not happen; however, if it had, then it might actually have deserved the borderline hysterical coverage it has received, "What is it? What's going on? Is it another Al-Qaeda plot? Are we ever going to be safe anymore? Oh no! We're all going to die......aaahhhhhh!"
Morbid and creepifying I got no problem with, so long as you do it quiet like.
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well there goes my insidious plan to disable an entire aircraft crew with jello shooters...dang it they are always one step ahead of me... I may be forced to switch to my master plan of disabling said aircraft crew with really expensive vodka ( though based on the latest round of drunken pilot scandals I may not need the good stuff)
I choose to rise instead of fall- U2
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Update:
Now CNN, MSNBC, and FOX are all running the JonBenet Ramsey story, because we simply didn't get enough coverage of this the first time around. Please! Bring back the claustrophobic grandmother. Maybe they'll cap off the evening with some O.J. Simpson news or we can have another rendition of, "What happened to Natalie Halloway?". I go to the Guerilla News Network (guerillanews.com) to find out what's going on in the world these days, because we're not going to get anything of any value from the talking heads at the other stations.
Morbid and creepifying I got no problem with, so long as you do it quiet like.
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i thinks its becoming pretty obvious by now whats going on, and its disturbing.
as im watching all this "TERROR 2006!!!" news coverage, i cant deny the literal feel of bombardment by propoganda; and the ultimate message is: "is current security enough?" or "Hilary Clinton voted against the Patriot act...is she soft on security?" and worst of all "is America prepared for the next Terror attack?" apparently, its been decided for you, that a terror attack is inevitable, and that security is priority one.
then on FOX, Neil Cavuto(?) was interviewing a soldier doing service in Iraq, who said that he believed (paraphrasing)'that the terrorists are recieving funds from somewhere, which is providing them with the weapons and other neccessary means.' essentially, hes saying, "someone is benefitting from this terrorism, which is why theyre supplying the money."
i wonder if the CIA, FBI, or homeland security guys are chomping at the bit for the next big one to strike, cause $$CHA-CHING$$ suddenly their budgets swell up and out of proportion to reality. of course im not presuming they have a motive! but perhaps the Federal Reserve will just manipulate a few more trillion dollars of inflation into the economy, to fund the next string of wars neccessary to remodel the world
if its not obvious that theyre conditioning us, literally out of our minds, to subconsciously implant a predistined goal, which they will then bring forth, then we deserve it. and by they, i mean the elite interests who really control the worlds money and assetts.
if we know mere politicians are taking advantage of this "war on terror", for their own political gain.... then why not huge financial interests, corportate giants, wall street, the military industrial complex, the black budget and intelligence communities, the global drug lords and international robber barons of the world; these people see us as degenerate, expendable, ignorant, shortsighted consumers, gentile cattle and cannon fodder for global conquest; probably no differnet from any other empire in History, only this time the media forces them to conceal their power.
the best way to grasp where such a collaborative agenda takes place is to research the Bilderberg group*, an elite "talk shop" or "conference", as they claim, which takes place annually under a media blackout, replete with armed guard, protecting the 125-150 rich-of-the-rich fortune 500, oil execs, media exes and corporate CEOs and world leaders, isolated from the common man and his prying ears. their collective worth is in the tens of Billions consistantly. the G8 summit is similar, but hides its blatancy from the public behind political correctness, spin and their corporate globalist rhetoric.
i fear a Terror attack not because of a terrorists, but because of our political leaders, since this is proving to go beyond just mental conditioning, into physical violation. it seems to me that to sacrifice a few 3000 on 9/11, or several thousands more in Iraq, in order to set up this utopic global police state, united serdom corporatocracy, the end would easily justify their means. keep that in the back of your mind the next danger of bird flu, anthrax, bomb scare, or whatever fear mongering antic the media blitz into your head
we've proven that in the past, the US gave Alqaeda hundreds of millions(maybe billions)in funds to fight for our cause; is it possible they never defected, that our FBI and CIA have treated them with kid gloves, let them run loose on purpose? it is odd the FBI admits it has no hard pyhsical evidence linking OBL to 9/11 isnt it? is it possible that recruiting disinfranchised muslims is so easy, thanks to 50's yrs of American foreign policy failures, that the CIA took their peice of the pie?
it frankly doesnt matter who terrorizes who, if you cant trust your own elected government officials to protect your "freedoms", that they so insistantly claim the terrorists hate so much; who is the real terrorist then?
since i believe this to be the case, this to me marks the official end
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The way I heard it, Gretta Vansustran was the hijacker. FOX NEWS said so. She allegedly had some KY Jelly, a photo of Geraldo Rivera, a Snoopy note book and a ice cream scooper.
That's what the unnamed sources said.
Honest.
People love a happy ending. So every episode, I will explain once again that I don't like people. And then Mal will shoot someone. Someone we like. And their puppy. - Joss
" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "
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