Words of the 'Verse

POSTED BY: Grimlock
UPDATED: Tuesday, May 30, 2006 14:57
VIEWED: 8911
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GIXXER

Friday, May 26, 2006 7:43 PM

Just an old joke.

American tourist arrives at a British Hotel reception desk, checks in, and the receptionist advises him that his room is on the second floor and directs him to the lift.

The American gets a bit arsey and stands on his dignity, demanding that it be called an elevator, since an American invented it.

Cue devastating put-down in cut-glass English accent.

MSG

Friday, May 26, 2006 7:46 PM

That is marvelous:)

GIXXER

Friday, May 26, 2006 7:47 PM

You're welcome.

MORWEN112

Friday, May 26, 2006 9:50 PM

That really is great, Gixxer! I prefer British English and spelling to the American version myself but my (American) teachers don't exactly sympathise...

I would also like to note that not all Americans are that rude when abroad.

Mine is an evil sugar high laugh! Bwahahahaha!

Morwen

GIXXER

Saturday, May 27, 2006 12:34 AM

That's OK. Just keep sneaking the letter "u" in here and there. I'm sure it'll find favour with someone somewhere. Or get you sent to Special Ed...

I'd also like to say that I've never met a rude American yet. Meet a few over here at work, spend holidays whenever possible in New England, and only use Ralph Morgan mouthpieces.

However, I have no time for that Bush fellow. He seems a thoroughly bad sort. He and the horrendous Blairs deserve each other.

FLORALBUNNY

Saturday, May 27, 2006 4:31 AM

msg wrote:
Friday, May 26, 2006 08:23
um torch is the British word for flashlight
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We didn't know that already? We weren't knowing that?
(Ack. Me and my foolish assumptions.)

Lift and elevator trivia: In US, one may wear "elevator shoes" which are built up, or one may insert "lifts" into the heel portions of the shoes to similar effect. I suppose one could do both. And pitch forward onto one's nose...

What's UK terminology for these?

bun
~6/23~Serenity/Firefly Summer~9/30~
----- why's the rum gone? 7706 -----

GIXXER

Saturday, May 27, 2006 11:39 PM

Status shoes (a term I must confess I've never ever heard used.)

Or you could go with the more prosaic "Height Increasing Shoes." While undeniably descriptive, I can't see a tagline like that causing many ad executives' hair to catch fire.

http://www.taylormadeshoes.co.uk/ReadyMade/StatusShoes/index.htm

(Be more handsome, eh? With my luck, I would be just as ugly as before, but just a bit taller...)

I've always had a problem understanding this sort of thing. First time wearers, how do you cope? Do you suddenly turn up at work / school looking like you're on cunningly concealed stilts, or what?

Then there's the removal problem, which puts them squarely in the same problem area as padded bras and toupees (you'll have to imagine the accent).

If you do have to consider removing them, they presumably have worked, and you've pulled. Unless you are a strictly "lights off" kinda guy / gal, the next few moments are likely to be interesting.

Define...well, you know the rest.

FLORALBUNNY

Sunday, May 28, 2006 2:30 AM

ROFL, Gixxer, at the images both of suddenly tall and then the taking off.
One could possibly market a series of taller-makers which could be used in sequence until the proper stiltedness was achieved.
Then, for the taking off, careful planning might result in doing it at the last minute (may one politely say "at the edge of the bed?")should there be any ambient light which might reveal the subterfuge.
Dual showering would be out, of course, and other activities I'll not mention -- such as brushing teeth together.

I've a tale of false eyelashes...not mine...but that's for another day.

bun
~6/23~Serenity/Firefly Summer~9/30~
----- why's the rum gone? 7706 -----

MORWEN112

Sunday, May 28, 2006 2:37 AM

False eyelashes, bun? Oh, do tell.
And as for status shoes, women have had them for awhile. We call them heels. I don't really wear them much...they have the nasty tendency of making me fall flat on my face. Not fun. Any one else have that problem?

Mine is an evil sugar high laugh! Bwahahahaha!

Morwen

FLORALBUNNY

Sunday, May 28, 2006 6:21 AM

Oh, I've paid my high-heel dues many times over.
No falling, however.
One learns to stalk along right smartly in the things.
Standing up to work in them all day was another matter.
Feh.

I'm trying to think of a way to condense the eyelash story properly...

bun
~6/23~Serenity/Firefly Summer~9/30~
----- why's the rum gone? 7706 -----

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