Passing along the random funny...

POSTED BY: chrisisall
UPDATED: Monday, May 1, 2006 19:41
VIEWED: 3484
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CHRISISALL

Monday, April 24, 2006 11:18 PM

I draw your attention to the fact that your most recent world-famous well-loved MI-6 double-oh was in fact Irish.
So there, limey.

Did I just dis myself to get at someone Chrisisall

CITIZEN

Monday, April 24, 2006 11:21 PM

But he was reading lines written by an englishman.

Game.
Set.
Match.

More insane ramblings by the people who brought you beeeer milkshakes!
And as you know, these are open forums, you're able to come and listen to what I have to say.

CHRISISALL

Monday, April 24, 2006 11:24 PM

FEE FIE FOE FUM....

Chrisisall

SAINTANDEOL

Monday, April 24, 2006 11:28 PM

Oh snap!

TAYEATRA

Thursday, April 27, 2006 9:59 PM

I was told this one when I was younger and I must admit to being vaguely amused...

Q.What do apples and hatstands have in common?

A.Neither of them can drive tractors.

For the more traditional amongst you...

A man walks into a bar and immediately falls over... Why???

...The bar was iron.

*****
Taya
*****
Dark Angel, Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Enterprise, Farscape... anything else you'd like to cancel?

NEEDY

Monday, May 1, 2006 6:50 PM

Wow, there's some real groaners in there - all great though

Here's some (long winded) favourites of mine

President George Bush was at the airport the other week when he noticed an old man with white hair, a long white beard and a staff standing around.
Astonished, George walked up to him and asked "Excuse me, are you Moses?"

The man stood there silently, blatantly ignoring the president's question.

He repeated the question "Excuse me. Are you Moses?"

Still, the man refused to acknowledge the president's presence.

Annoyed with the man's lack of response, George walks back to his security men, and tells them of the man rudely ignoring him.

One of the security men then walks to the silent figure and demands an explanation.
"Yes I am Moses..." the man responds. "and I did hear the President's question. But the last time I spoke to a Bush, I spent 40 years wandering in the wilderness"

And if you think that was a groaner...

There were two prawns swimming in the ocean, best friends. One was named Justin, the other Christian

Life wasn't great though, they were constantly harassed by the sharks that swan close by.

Tired of being afraid for his life all the time, Justin sighed "I wish I was a Shark, no longer would I be prey to my enemies"
Just then, a mysterious Cod appeared and said "Your wish is my command." With that, Justin found himself miraculously transformed into a Shark.

Petrified that he would be eaten by his best friend, Christian immediately swam away.

Justin was contented with his new life though, for a few days at least. But then he began to feel lonely. Whenever he went and visited his old friends, they would flee, afraid they would be eaten.
Yes, soon Justin was very lonely.

"Oh, I wish I wasn't like this. I don't want to be a shark any more!"
"So be it" a voice called out as the powerful cod appeared, transforming Justin to his original form

Elated, Justin immediately swan back to his old home looking for his old friend.

"Christian?" he cried outside of his friend's house

"Go away. I don't want to be eaten!"

"No. It's okay" Justin replied. "I've found Cod. I'm a prawn again Christian!"

oh and I might as well add a classic englishman,scotsman,irishman joke

An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman were driving through the desert when all of a sudden the car breaks down.
Unable to fix it they resolve to walk to the nearest town, taking only necessary provisions with them.
The Englishman takes some food. "If we get hungry, at least we'll have something to eat"
The Scotsman takes some water. "If we get thirsty, we'll have something to drink.
The Irishman takes the car door.
The other two look at him confused.
He explains "Well, if it gets too hot, I can wind the window down"

-----
Needy. Male Companion:
First Boy Whore of Destiny
Incredibly Confused Companion of SereniTree
-----
www.myspace.com/needsalt
http://needsalt.livejournal.com/

NEEDY

Monday, May 1, 2006 7:20 PM

some quickies:

A black horse walks into a pub.
The barkeeper says "Hey, our pub's named after you!"
The horse replies "What? Eric?"

A Horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?"

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
Pregnant

A blonde locked her keys in the car.
She had to break a window to get out.

-----
Needy. Male Companion:
First Boy Whore of Destiny
Incredibly Confused Companion of SereniTree
-----
www.myspace.com/needsalt
http://needsalt.livejournal.com/

TAYEATRA

Monday, May 1, 2006 7:41 PM

A little girl is in the garden digging a large hole and sniffling. The lady next door peeps over the fence smiling.

"Whats wrong?" she asks.

"My goldfish died," the little girl, replies not turning around.

"That hole will be too big for your goldfish," the lady replies.

The little girl continues digging..."it's in your cat."

*****
Taya
*****
Dark Angel, Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Enterprise, Farscape... anything else you'd like to cancel?

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