Heinlein's List (How do you stack up?)

POSTED BY: Koffee
UPDATED: Tuesday, July 8, 2003 05:15
VIEWED: 7480
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KOFFEE

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 7:35 AM

Taking a cue from Kenwwod’s post on the “Firefly and the Heinlein Connection” thread, I thought it would be fun for all of us to go through Heinlein’s list and see how we measure up to his expectations.

Here is Heinlein's list of the 21 things every human should be able to do:

A human being should be able to:
change a diaper = can do
plan an invasion = haven’t felt the need to yet
butcher a hog = haven't yet, but I've helped with my fair share of deer
conn a ship = if this means drive it, well, I’ve paddled a canoe once, but that is about it
design a building = helped draw out my parents plans for their house before we gave the drawings to the architect
write a sonnet = wrote poetry back in high school
balance accounts = I try to make sure the check book is updated via online account every other day
build a wall = yep, landscape retaining walls
set a bone = never had to
comfort the dying = all to recently
take orders = all the time
give orders = all the time
cooperate = yep
act alone = ya
solve equations = when necessary, if I understand them in the first place
analyze a new problem = part of my job
pitch manure = now this is an area where I could be classified as an expert!
program a computer = no way, I’m lucky I found my way to the internet
cook a tasty meal = learned from Grandma
fight efficiently = um, depends on if he means with words or fists? I love good natured debate. But I’m still waiting for mom to teach my those judo throws she used to use on her older brothers.
die gallantly = hopefully I won’t find out on this one for a gorram long time

----------------------------------------------
“It's a real burn, being right so often.”

LOTV

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 10:07 AM

change a diaper = No Problemo
plan an invasion = Every night on my comp
butcher a hog = If its just butcher, no problem.. but you probably wouldn't want to eat what I slice to ya...

conn a ship = Driving a ship... Remember MST3K the movie?

design a building = sure.. but I don't suggest actually building it..
write a sonnet = Been there, done that.
balance accounts = I know what money I've got...
build a wall = Built a tower.. walls are nothing
set a bone = Done that in scouts before...
comfort the dying = With as little tears as possible.
take orders = Definitely been there..
give orders = Muahaha... I mean.. yes.
cooperate = sure
act alone = can do
solve equations = y=mx+b
analyze a new problem = yea
pitch manure = tossing sh|t... natural human quality.
program a computer = yes++;
cook a tasty meal = tastey for me...
fight efficiently = been a while, but sure.
die gallantly = ...does that mean I can't cry like a baby?

LOTV: Ima-who-whata-whoichy-whoda-whazza--huh?

Garapagosu Last Update: 6/24/03

MARK

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 12:45 PM

Things every human being should be able to do...

Change a nappy - Yes.
Plan an invasion - I do it as a hobby on weekends.
Butcher a hog - I have the theory, don't know about the practical.
Conn a ship - Totally. Thank the Goddess for space-flight sims.
Design a building - Yup. Not as well as a pro-architect but I could do it.
Write a sonnet - Yup. Have done. Kinda. Just ask Sarahetc.
Balance accounts - Simple. Course, in Heinlein's day they didn't have Excel.
Build a Wall - Hell, I've been a builder's labourer, I could build any damn house I design.
Set a bone - Once again I've got the theory but the practical would be interesting.
Comfort the dying - Done it. Unfortunately.
Take orders - Every day.
Give orders - Not a problem.
Cooperate - Difficult but I think I could.
Act alone - I do that a lot.
Solve equations - Some... With the help of a reference book.
Analyze a new problem - I think so, although it depends on definitions.
Pitch Manure - Done it.
Program a computer - Depends on the language. I'm ok with RISC assembler and Modula 2.
Cook a tasty meal - Easy... But remember tasty can just be beans, potato and something grilled!
Fight efficiently - If I'm given time to make my decisions.
Die gallantly - I hope so.

Twelve spheres of unendurable brightness spalled the velvety blackness of space.
The silence on Lester Tourville's flag bridge was absolute
And then the spell was broken as Shannon Foraker looked up from her console from where she had just sent a seemingly innocent command to the main computers of State Security's finest Superdreadnoughts.
"Oops." She said.

BEOWULF

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 1:08 PM

change a diaper = It's been a while, but I can.
plan an invasion = Sure - but opportunities for execution have been few.
butcher a hog = Oddly enough, yes.
conn a ship = If we're talking about a sailing ship, not a chance. Otherwise, maybe but I wouldn't risk the other folks on board trying.
design a building = Sure. Noramlly I'd run my plans by an engineer before actually building...
write a sonnet = yup.
balance accounts = yup.
build a wall = Would you like that in stone, brick, cinderblock, rr ties or studs & drywall?
set a bone = Had the training but luckily never the opportunity.
comfort the dying = Hmm. I've tried.
take orders = yup.
give orders = yup.
cooperate = yup.
act alone = yup.
solve equations = Not a strong point - but I can.
analyze a new problem = yup.
pitch manure = Did I do it wrong? What is there to know?
program a computer = yup.
cook a tasty meal = Most days.
fight efficiently = Efficiently? Effectively anyway.
die gallantly = On the day I discover that, my training as a human will be complete.

Actually, I'd like to add a few things to this list, if y'all don't mind:

Change a tire = yup
Build a fire = yup
Sew a shirt = yup
orienteer unfamiliar wilderness using a compass and topo map = yup, but I could use more practice.
Navigate an unfamiliar city using a map. = yup
Hotwire a car = not yet
Grow a salad from seeds = yup

KAYTHRYN

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 3:25 PM

change a diaper = yup.
plan an invasion = plan an invasion of the boys snow fort...yeah...anything bigger than that...no.
butcher a hog = I can butcher a deer, does that count?
conn a ship = unless it’s on a lake, no.
design a building = yeah, I used to design parts of buildings... I’m sure I could figure out the rest of that stuff.
write a sonnet = not in a million years.
balance accounts = yup.
build a wall = um...yeah...don’t know how sturdy it’d be but yeah.
set a bone = yes.
comfort the dying = Sadly I’ve got lost of experience with that.
take orders = yes sir.
give orders = hehehe, happily.
cooperate = no.
act alone = very nicely.
solve equations = I could try.
analyze a new problem = yup.
pitch manure = not quite sure how I could screw it up.
program a computer = maybe in a few weeks.
cook a tasty meal = yup.
fight efficiently = yes.
die gallantly = yeah, ‘cause why not?
Change a tire = yup
Build a fire = with one match or two sticks and a shoe lace.
Sew a shirt = yeah.
orienteer unfamiliar wilderness using a compass and topo map = yeah.
Navigate an unfamiliar city using a map. = Probably not.
Hotwire a car = yeah, can break into one pretty cleanly too.
Grow a salad from seeds = yup.

-------------------------------------
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it.
Aristotle

JOHNNYREB

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 4:45 PM

Alright, I know I haven't posted in a while but this sounds fun...

change a diaper--more experience than I would really like.
plan an invasion--I ROCK the games Allied General and Panzer General.
butcher a hog--I could, but it would be, well, butchered.
conn a ship--Since "conn" means direct the movements of a ship by giving directions to a helmsman, I guess so. I would just say, "go there," and hopefully he knows more than I do about "going there."
design a building--floor plan, yes, 3-D model, no.
write a sonnet--Quite a few in college, actually.
balance accounts--My job
build a wall--yup
set a bone--nope
comfort the dying--depends who they were.
take orders--yes
give orders--yes
cooperate--yes
act alone--yes
solve equations--no
analyze a new problem--yes
pitch manure--How hard is it, really?
program a computer--Not in a million jillion years.
cook a tasty meal--edible, though not a real taste sensation
fight efficiently--depends on what I'm fighting for, and what kind of fight it is. I haven't won against my wife yet.
die gallantly--I want to say, yes. But I fear it may be the most abject display of cowardess to embarass anyone with the misfortune of witnessing it. Another problem is, if you screw it up the first time, you blew your one chance.

VETERAN

Tuesday, July 1, 2003 5:08 PM

change a diaper--Can do.
plan an invasion-- Full frontal assault, sure.
butcher a hog--I can clean a fish. But I don't know how to butcher a hog. I 'm sure I could slice off a few chunks if I had a sharp enough knife.
conn a ship-- I can sail a small boat.
design a building--depends on the building.
write a sonnet--Never tried. I suppose there's rules to follow for that, so I give it a yes.
balance accounts--Sometimes.
build a wall-- Yes.
set a bone-- I can tie a splint and treat for shock.
comfort the dying-- I suppose.
take orders-- Most of the time.
give orders-- Sure. But who listens.
cooperate--Yes.
act alone-- Yes.
solve equations-- Depends how complex.
analyze a new problem-- Yes.
pitch manure-- Both verbally and physically.
program a computer-- I used to be able to write Basic and Fortran, but who needs that stuff anymore.
cook a tasty meal-- Yes.
fight efficiently-- Verbally I can sometimes rise to the occassion. Physically I can comport myself in a manly fashion. My spinning-back-roundhouse has seen better days, but, I still have a nasty front kick(and I know where to put it), and I know a couple of good trips and throws.
die gallantly-- I only hope so.

KOFFEE

Wednesday, July 2, 2003 4:21 AM

Quote:
Originally posted by Beowulf:
Actually, I'd like to add a few things to this list, if y'all don't mind:

Don't mind a bit. here are my answers....

Change a tire = if need be
Build a fire = with a good lighter or a big book of matches
Sew a shirt = I can make one from scratch
Orienteer unfamiliar wilderness using a compass and topo map = haven't tried, so I don't know
Navigate an unfamiliar city using a map = yes
Hotwire a car = never tried, but most likely not
Grow a salad from seeds = have a time or two

----------------------------------------------
“It's a real burn, being right so often.”

WULFHAWK

Wednesday, July 2, 2003 4:37 AM

I tend to overconfidence, but I'll try to keep it real.

A human being should be able to:
change a diaper = 4 kids worth
plan an invasion = nothing larger than 30 men so far
butcher a hog = deer, calf, no hog yet
conn a ship = not yet, small boats only
design a building = nope
write a sonnet = done it
balance accounts = done it
build a wall = done it
set a bone = only sprains so far, tuff kids
comfort the dying = yes
take orders = married
give orders = 4 kids
cooperate = yes
act alone = yes
solve equations = only this side of calculus
analyze a new problem = 4 kids
pitch manure = done it
program a computer = done it
cook a tasty meal = not gourmet, but I do ok
fight efficiently = guns, knives, swords, fists, water ballons, bulletin board duels
die gallantly = one day, yup

Damn, that's not as good as I'd hoped.

tanstaafl

SERENITYVALLEY

Wednesday, July 2, 2003 2:29 PM

change a diaper = I believe so
plan an invasion = don't know
butcher a hog = no
conn a ship = maaaaaybe
design a building = probably not one that will stay up
write a sonnet = yes, indeed
balance accounts = not yet
build a wall = doubt it
set a bone = ew
comfort the dying = not yet
take orders = yes
give orders = yes
cooperate = yes
act alone = yes
solve equations = yes
analyze a new problem = yes
pitch manure = not yet
program a computer = I betcha
cook a tasty meal = heck no!
fight efficiently = yeah
die gallantly = don't know yet.

"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?" -Wash
"I told him to sit down," -Simon

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