Who's Tougher?
POSTED BY: Succatash
UPDATED: Friday, May 16, 2003 02:17
VIEWED: 8657
PAGE 4 of 5
Okay. I'll be playing a solo feature at a concert Saturday evening. Y'all come and then we can throw down in the parking lot.
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Mal vs. Book
Preacher can pack a punch, but Mal has more experience. If Book were to take a swing at Mal, he'd be ready for it. If Mal were to take a swing at Book, he'd be too startled to block.
Mal vs. Jayne
Jayne's like a little whiney kid, but he's got some heavy duty weaponry. He doesn't need brains to be a good fighter, but it comes in handy. Mal's been in the war and knows war tactics but he'd go back to save someone even if it meant dying.
Mal vs. Zoe
I'd like to believe Zoe can beat the crap out of Mal if she had good reason, but she follows his orders for the most part. "yes sir no sir"
I don't know who William Riker really is. Is that star trek or something?
Mal vs. Han Solo
As far as I'm concerned, Mal IS Han Solo. I've thought that from the start. They are so much alike. Mal's a little more serious.
Mal vs. Elvis
Well what kind of a question is that?
I don't know the other people. Sorry.
"Did he just go crazy and fall asleep?" -Wash
"I told him to sit down," -Simon
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Quote:
Originally posted by SerenityValley:
I don't know who William Riker really is. Is that star trek or something?
Riker is the guy who runs the QuickieMart on The Simpsons.
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1. Mal vs. Book - I'm not sure...I suspect we've only seen just the tip of Book's iceberg-like prowess at the fine art of ass-whupage. I'll go with the unknown and say Book, if only because the scope of his skills might catch Mal by surprise (although Mal already suspects much...).
2. Mal vs. Jayne - No question, it'd be Mal. Because after all, there's no way Mal would fight that battle anything like fair, and deep down, Jayne's a sucker for a good fight. Two very different priorities....
3. Mal vs. Zoe - Zoe. End of story (literally...).
4. Mal vs. William Riker - Mal, because even though Riker takes on Klingons for breakfast, Mal would never set his 'phasor' on stun....
5. Mal vs. Han Solo - They wouldn't fight, because neither of them goes looking for trouble. If they did, however, I'd put my money on...one of them.
6. Mal vs. Capt. Archer - Mal, because Archer doesn't even have a phasor to set on stun....
7. Mal vs. Dirty Harry - Dirty Harry, 'cause a man's got to know his limitations....
8. Mal vs. Maverick (James Gardner/Mel Gibson) - Tough call, but Mal could probably drink Maverick under the table....
9. Mal vs. Elvis Presley - Regius exanimus est.
10. Mal vs. Jack Bauer - Maybe, maybe if Keifer were a vampire (a la Lost Boys). Maybe. As an FBI spook, he's toast.
11. Mal vs. Kirk - "We come. In. Peace. We mean you. No. Harm." At this point, Mal sucker-punches Kirk, who responds with one of his two-handed swings to the jaw. Mal looks back in time to see Kirk launch a tackle, and they go flying into a wall. Mal delivers a double shot to Kirk's ears, and Kirk staggers back with a close up on his overly-agonized face. Mal follows up with a kick to the groin, but Kirk busts out a nimble dodge and the canned fight music goes into overdrive (dah dah dah dah dah dah-dah-dah-dah, dah-dah-dah-dah-dah...). They circle each other for a tense moment, and Kirk charges in with a right hook. At this point, Mal shoots him.
- "Everyone's afraid of the neighborhood griper."
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Quote:Have you seen any Elvis movies? He's a tough fighter!
Originally posted by SerenityValley:
Mal vs. Elvis
Well what kind of a question is that?
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How about Jayne vs. Vasquez (of Aliens fame)?
- Fear the badger, for it is mighty!
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Quote:
Originally posted by Succatash:Quote:Have you seen any Elvis movies? He's a tough fighter!
Originally posted by SerenityValley:
Mal vs. Elvis
Well what kind of a question is that?
I still say that the real question here is Wash vs. Elvis.
Sarah
I'm a dying breed who still believes, haunted by American dreams. ---Neko Case
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2. Mal vs. Jayne
Mal wins, it's no secret that Jayne is afraid of Mal, intimidation goes a long way.
6. Mal vs. Capt. Archer
If I remember right, Al would tell Sam whatever he needed to know to win, or Sam would disappear in a flash of blue before he could be thoroughly beat.
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2. Mal vs. Jayne
Well, I'm clearly in the minority here, but six men came to kill Jayne, one of them carrying Vera, and he's still alive! I admit Mal is definitely smarter, but Jayne's main thing is fighting. Even Mal said Jayne's about the best when it comes to fighting (in Heart of Gold). But I admit I'm biased, b/c Jayne is awesome! :)
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Jayne always avoids confrontation with Mal, he demonstrates that he is afraid of Mal. So I think Mal would win because he intimidates Jayne. I don't dispute that Jayne is a better fighter, but I still think he would lose.
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