Why Firefly isn't a good show...

POSTED BY: NEEDY
UPDATED: Thursday, August 25, 2005 17:39
VIEWED: 7423
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NEEDY

Sunday, August 21, 2005 5:15 PM

Inspired by a bunch of similarly themed IMDB Forum posts, I decided to create a Firefly one. It's unfinished but I thought you could help out and add to it

Before anyone starts criticising - let me just point out that the following list is sarcastic

A list of reasons why Firefly isn't a good show

It's unrealistic

As we all know, in the future, everything is sleek and new like on Star Trek, plus horses are probably extinct

A ship's crew always get along, with no member threatening to betray the others.

Simon can't be River's brother but must be her lover, indicated by the fact that she was found naked in his luggage

The cast are referred to as Big Damn Heroes, but anyone can see they are of only average height. Chewbacca is much taller

In real life, the good guys win wars

The show promotes stealing

The show promotes prostitution

Sometimes the characters start speaking Chinese for no apparent reason

It's politically incorrect – the captain often refers to the ship's companion as a "whore"

Every spaceship show needs to have aliens in it. (Applies also to Battlestar Galactica)

Sometimes the cameraman doesn't know where the action is and is desperately just trying to keep up (Again, also applies to Battlestar Galactica)

The show's makers spent so much time getting good special effects, they forgot to add the cool sound effects in space

They also seemed to have run out of budget as the only explosions in space aren’t the big fireballs we see in the superior Star Wars saga

The ship and planets they visit look like they have been lived in – don’t the makers know that the "sleek and new" look promoted in the Star Wars prequels is "the in thing"?

The show is a western but is also a space show?! Nuff Said

Other reasons
Fox cancelled it after only a few episodes. How good could it have been?

Needy. Male Companion a.k.a. First Boy Whore of Destiny

FRSCPE1

Sunday, August 21, 2005 5:43 PM

I just hope everyone reads the post and not just the title before responding.

"Well, other than being shot at by the Electric Mayhem, I'm fantastic."

NEEDY

Sunday, August 21, 2005 5:50 PM

I know, I thought that for a while as it often happens on IMDB, but I figured the members here are not as trigger-happy

besides if they tried to kill me, I'd just kill em right back

Needy. Male Companion a.k.a. First Boy Whore of Destiny

FRSCPE1

Sunday, August 21, 2005 5:52 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by NEEDY:
besides if they tried to kill me, I'd just kill em right back

As it should be.

Yeah, I don't think anyone will jump the gun and go crazy. Unless they're kidding around.

"Well, other than being shot at by the Electric Mayhem, I'm fantastic."

THEREAVER

Sunday, August 21, 2005 6:04 PM

OMG. How could you? If you just came here to slag the show then you should just leave before we all kill you.

Yeah, I was joking.

-----------------------
I'll rape you to death.
I'll eat your flesh.
I'll sew your skin into my clothes.
If you're very very lucky, I'll do it in that order - TheReaver

WHIMSICALBRAINPAN

Sunday, August 21, 2005 7:35 PM

I think, and perhaps it's heretical, that you either get Firefly or you don't. Some people can be brought to the show, I suppose; but let's face it, Firefly's a little weird.

That's why I love it.

But some people don't want weird and challenging. Some people want everything explained to them. If you want a show about Upstanding Humans blowing up Evil Aliens, this isn't your thing. Firefly's not a black-and-white shoot'em-up show. It's not a show built on predictable "plot twists" showing up in the final two minutes. It's not even really science fiction (and I know Wash agrees with me here), since there's very little attention paid to the "science," and the fact that they're in space actually has little to do with the plots.

Think about what passes for "great" TV drama these days and you'll see what the public hungers for. Think about ER for instance: no one ever comes in with a broken leg and no story; the only people who come in are infants riddled with bullet holes or people with obscure diseases or (and these are the worst) "People With a Difficult Choice to Make." This isn't "drama," it's DRAMA!!!! Don't think! Just let yourself be washed away by the blood and beeping machinery.

In contrast, who is Mal? He's a good guy, but not so good that he won't shoot someone who needs shooting. He's not a rebel, though he hates the government and won't shirk from an opportunity to do them some hurt. All he wants to do is live life on his terms, to carve out a little scrap of independence for himself and his crew. Heck, I bet if the Browncoats had won the war, he'd still be doing what he's doing. THIS IS NOT EASY FOR MOST PEOPLE TO GRASP.

There is drama all around us, good drama, if only there is a storyteller gifted enough to package it. The best drama if often not found in a hospital, or a police station, or even a warship in space. Firefly is full of rarer dramatic moments, each dripping with authenticity. My favorite is Inara, curled up in a corner crying in "Heart of Gold"--not a "space" moment, not a "tense" moment, not a "violence" moment--a human moment. Today's "drama" could use a liberal sprinkling of these.

UNCHARTEDOUTLAW

Sunday, August 21, 2005 8:57 PM

I was so ready to come in here, guns a-blazin' based solely on the thread title. So glad that I can save my ammo for something else. :) And yes, I agree that Firefly is something you get or something you don't. And for those who don't...well, I just feel sorry for em.

-Taylor

http://norcalriviera.blogspot.com
http://www.cafepress.com/norcalriviera

**Winner of That Other Shiny Caption Game #2**

River: "So we'll integrate non-progressional evolution theory with God's creation of Eden. Eleven inherent metaphoric parallels already there. Eleven. Important number. Prime number. One goes into the house of eleven eleven times, but always comes out one. Noah's ark is a problem."

KIZZIECSTARS

Sunday, August 21, 2005 9:12 PM

yep, some people get it, some people dont.
but how do you get people to watch it and give it a chance to grow on them without having to hit em over the head, tie em to a chair and sit em right in front of a wide screen tv. coz i'm pretty sure that constitutes a violation of human rights.
but they just say - "oh, it's sci fi, i wont like it"
HOW close minded can you get? do they not understand that firefly trancends genres? its just GREAT whether u like sci fi or not!!!!
just because theres no moany public shoved in some crappy house together and filmed, doesnt mean that all you unintelligent morons (i'm refering to non firefly lovers - please dont kill me) will hate it.
plus, it's got sean maher topless in it, and who wouldn't LOVE that.

peace out
Kizzie
XxX

DECKROID

Sunday, August 21, 2005 9:21 PM

*** More Other Reasons For Cancellation ***

Everyone knows that space ships make noises in space.

Same sexed people dont kiss each other.

Good guys speak English. Bad guys speak Klingon. There are no other languages.

Its not a reality show.

The crew of Firefly were a bunch of losers. Who wants to see the stars of the show fail?

There was a distinct lack of latex appendages.

Heros do not run from anyone.

NEEDY

Sunday, August 21, 2005 10:05 PM

Quote:
Originally posted by frscpe1:
Quote:
Originally posted by NEEDY:
besides if they tried to kill me, I'd just kill em right back

As it should be.

Yeah, I don't think anyone will jump the gun and go crazy. Unless they're kidding around.

Precisely - I have faith in them

Needy. Male Companion a.k.a. First Boy Whore of Destiny

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