A Modest Proposal
POSTED BY: perfessergee
UPDATED: Sunday, August 7, 2005 03:04
VIEWED: 2920
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Yowza, the RWED boards are alive with rhetoric the last few days. Could be inflated, might involve some trash, but definitely alive, so what's a discriminating thinker to .... er, uh, think? In the interest of trying to hit on some compromise territory, I want to make a small suggestion. Please note: I'm not talking below about events that have already occurred, my proposal speaks to the future.
Based on my reading of the boards today, it seems like one group of folk thinks that "those people" hate our culture and everything about us, and that therefore we (i.e., the US) would be righteous in invading "them". Can't let anybody trash-talk about us can we? Not to mention tolerate having them shoot back if we were so importunate as to shoot at them (we would only righteously shoot at them, of course).
Other folk seem to think that invasions based on demonstrated cultural dislike are just way over the top (even if they really, really don't like us and truly are likely someday to shoot at us before we shoot at them). We are just picking on poor unfortunates, and perhaps we should indulge them in a shot or two. It might make them feel better about us and cause them to leave us to our own devices. "They", of course, would only righteously shoot at us.
Pretty hard to reconcile these divergent viewpoints, ain't it? Well, perhaps we should just be fair about the whole thing, and in my view, fairness starts at home. Since we've already invaded two places that very clearly don't like us, it only makes sense to begin here at home.
So here's my proposal folks: We need to get serious, and invade everybody who hates our culture and thinks we need to clean up our act. So, let’s start by invading Northern Idaho and National Right to Life. We need to be scrupulously fair, so we might follow that by invading San Francisco and MoveOn.org. We could follow that with the Heritage Foundation and NPR, and I think by now that you get my drift.
Now the more overtly political among you must be thinking that we should also invade both the Democratic and Republican National Committees, but that would be a cheap shot. They are both fully capable of shooting themselves on any given day, so who are we to interfere? Besides, who in their right mind would want to get close enough to shoot either one?
And so we might proceed, fair and balanced (two by two, hands of blue………). Life would be so much better, wouldn’t it?
Just a Modest Proposal,
perfessergee
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If all they do is 'trash talk' us and wave signs exclaiming how bad we are, I could live w/ that. In fact, I'd be happy. If that's ALL they did. We'll continue to send aid/ money / volunteers to countries where we ( The United States ) are hated the most. Not as a 'bribe' to get them to like us, but simply because we care about our fellow humans. Even if they don't reciprocate.
" They don't like it when you shoot at 'em. I worked that out myself. "
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Hhrrummppff. I'm embarrassed to bump my own thread, but I'm wondering if the readers of the RWED threads either a) don't recognize satire (the immediately previous response suggests this might be the case), or b) think satire is not appropriate to the RWED threads.
Personally, I've always thought that much of the discussion on these threads has been satirical. Surely those who expound such extreme positions (be they of the right or left) are being devil's advocates, aren't they? Could they really be so humorless and pedantic? May the gods frown on those who can't laugh at themselves.
perfessergee
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Don't you trash talk about me...
I know where you live...
I have a monkey and I'm not afraid to use it...
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
--W.C. Fields
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HAHAHAHA!!!! I harrumphed (with suppressed laughter) when I read your post. I think we should inavde Karl Rove's inner sanctum. Although we might find Jeff Gannon there...
OH GAWD!! Now I'm going to have to mind-wipe myself to get rid of that image!!! AAAAAAHHHHHHH.......!!!!
I jsut love trash talk- don't you?
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I'm just relieved no one being eaten in your plan.
SergeantX
"Dream a little dream or you can live a little dream. I'd rather live it, cause dreamers always chase but never get it." Aesop Rock
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Quote:
Originally posted by citizen:
I have a monkey and I'm not afraid to use it...
LOL
Quote:
Originally posted by SignyM:
Although we might find Jeff Gannon there...
Gannon!?!??! I thought Link and I took care of him over a decade ago...
----
"Canada being mad at you is like Mr. Rogers throwing a brick through your window." -Jon Stewart, The Daily Show
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Quote:
Originally posted by Citizen:
Don't you trash talk about me...
I know where you live...
I have a monkey and I'm not afraid to use it...
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
--W.C. Fields
Michael? Is that you?
Bubbles doesn't like to be used in that way..you know
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No, bubbles likes to be used in ENTIERLY different ways. 
A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her.
--W.C. Fields
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