CAPTION TIGHTPANTS #26
POSTED BY: TenthCrewMember
UPDATED: Tuesday, May 10, 2005 01:42
VIEWED: 10394
PAGE 2 of 5
Mal: ...and you're going to stay standing on one leg until you stop seeing homoerotic undertones everywhere.
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SEAN:"What are you guys up to?"
NATHAN:"Just prepping to head out for the next Con"
SEAN:"Soooo....why are Adam's pits all sweaty?"
OR
Jayne was awfully embarassed when Simon walked in on Mal finishing giving him a dance lesson workout.
OR
MAL:"I've given you a raise, now what do you say...."
JAYNE:(reluctantly)"Thank you Master Reynolds...."
SIMON:"OOoooookkaaayyyyy........"
OR
SEAN:"What's going on?"
NATHAN:"Oh, Adam, just saw all the fan mail since last Tuesday...got kinda sick"
OR
JAYNE:*grunt**puff**grunt*
SIMON:"What's going on?"
MAL:"Oh nuthin'. Just getting Jayne to move all the past Caption Tightpants out from the middle of the room."
OR
GAME SHOW STYLE
MAL:"Jayne, you can either try and lift this box, drop it, and get what is inside, or ask for whatever Simon is bringing down the room in his pocket right now!!!!"
JAYNE:"I....I'll...I'll take the box!!!
*picks up the box and drops it with a thud*
MAL:"HE TOOK THE BOX!!!LET'S SEE WHAT'S IN THE BOX!!"
*Jayne opens the box to reveal that it is, in fact, empty*
MAL:"NOTHING!!ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!!STUPID!!!YOU ARE SO STUPID!!!!"
OR
After Mal returned from the "corner of No and Where" and got his clothes on, he realized that he and Jayne and Simon had ventured into the "Center of Yes and There"
OR
SEAN:"Bad news guys, we've been cancelled!!!"
NATHAN:"Oh no, what happenned!!"
SEAN:"well, they simply had no room for us. They had to make room for such quality shows as Fastlane, That 80s Show, Andy Richter Controls the Universe, Cedric the Entertainer, Greg the Bunny.....(continues for 3 minutes naming shows)"
ADAM:"So what do we do?"
SEAN:"Well, i suppose if all those shows go down the tubes, or the DVD's sell well enough to start a movie, we might have a shot....."
/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\
Time for some thrilling heroics!
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The first event of the Serenity Olympics was a blowout, as Jayne stopped to catch his breath before taunting Simon after Mal declared him the victor of the One-Legged Race. Wash had dropped out of the race so he could practice geese juggling. (Things can get pretty boring when you're out in the black, staying clear of all manner of civilized folk)
I mock you with my monkey pants.
Oh, yeah - check out my rock band: http://www.readyempire.com/index.php?option=com_artistdirectory&task=s
howCD&id=1
Click on "Play Entire CD"
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Quote:
Jayne: Watch this Cap'n.
Simon: Hold that football good and tight, Jayne.
Mal: Simon Tam...you blockhead!
OR:
Simon presides over the annual Serenity Scoliosis Screenings.
OR:
Having pissed off both Mal and Jayne, Simon found himself in the uncomfortable position of "Honorary Horseshoe Spike".
OR:
Simon: I'm a flamingo...Caw Caw...Caw Caw...
Jayne: Say Mal, his sister ain't contagious, is she?
OR:
Mal: So, Simon? You gonna tell us your plan or not?
Simon: Yeah...Given the pit stains under Jayne's arms, I think I'll be telling you from over here.
OR:
Mal: Ha Ha, Jayne...you left a pin!
Jayne: Watch me pick up this spare!
Simon: I'm...uncomfortable with this.
OR:
Simon: Is that the new shirt I gave you to replace the one River sliced?
Jayne: Yeah? So?
Simon: Yes, I can see where a rip and some bloodstains would be much worse than the thirteen gallons of sweat pouring through your yellowing pit stains.
OR:
Simon: I have a job for...Never mind. I can see you're in the middle of a "job" already.
OR:
Nathan: Well, if it isn't the "Little Bitch"!
Adam: Yeah...still having problems remembering your sister's name?
Sean: Come on guys. Its not my fault I got more fan mail after Objects In Space!
And I'll be back with more later...this one's hard, and the ones that are already here are funnier than anything I could come up with!
Kaylee: "What's so damn important about being proper? It don't mean nothing out here in the black."
Simon: "It means more out here. It's all I have..."
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(Jayne after injuring his back in Trash)
Mal: Hay Simon your right! Jayne is some sort of man-ape!
Simon: Yes he must be the missing link; Homo-Stupidis.
Jayne: Yea laugh it up! So are we going to play horseshoes or screw around?
EV Nova Firefly mod Message Board:
http://s4.invisionfree.com/GunRunner/index.php?act=idx
My Other Site:
http://www.utnhq.com/TLAM_Strike/index.htm
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Caption:
*Baywatch theme begins playing in the background*
“I loath bus stations. Terrible places. Full of lost luggage and lost souls.”
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Simon: CAP'N! LOOK OUT!! A TERRIFYING SPACE MONK--oh...it's just Jayne.
Jayne: Y'know, if wishes were horses I'd stick your head up--
Mal: JAYNE! You'll keep a civil tongue in that mouth of yours...besides, *snicker* you do look a might terrifyin' and kinda ape-ified right now.
Cilantro!
TCM
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Simon: "Hey, has anyone seen River? She kicked me in the face last Tuesday and I just came to, so if either of you know where she went....? A bar, perhaps?"
or
Simon: "Hey guys, i was just....WOAH!"
Jayne: "uh, umm, doc, this ain't what it looks like, i swear!"
Simon: "So you aren't playing horseshoes without me?"
Jayne: "Um, yeah, that's it...we were playing horseshoes....sorry we didn't call you first.."
That's the best i can think of for now.
"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie
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sorry 'bout the double posting, but i gots another idea......
Yes, they had both just been punched in the groin. But Mal took it like a man.
Either that, or
Simon: "Hey, Jayne! I see you found my life-sized mannequin of Mal. Like it?"
Jayne: (thinking) "Mannequin?.......AAAAAAUGH!!!!!"
"When your miracle gets here, you just pound this button once." -Alan Tudyk, in a message to Joss with the packaged button, about the Firefly movie
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Jayne lines up his approach, knowing it will take all his skill to pick up the very difficult Simon-10 split...
OR
Calvinball was enjoyed by everyone. Simonbowl was enjoyed by everyone except, well, Simon.
EDIT: Changed 1-Simon to Simon-10. I go for the cheap puns every time!
MAL "You only gotta scare him."
JAYNE "Pain is scary..."
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